Wedding Forum - Help for crying bride...

TBH if my son wasnt invited to my sisters wedding I would tell her where to go (she adores our son and he is 6 when they get married next week).

from my point of view i think its very harsh not to include your niece or nephew. we had 2 children at our wedding our son and his best friend (my best friends daughter) our nephews were invited but their mum choose not to include them in our day which hurt me and my now husband very much.

by the time your wedding comes your niece or nephew will be 1 year old and very cute just make it known to your BIL that of the child gets unsettled they need to go outside during the ceremony so not to interrupt proceedings.

Think how you would feel if roles were reversed and bear in mind this is the grooms brothers child.

EDIT:
we have been invited to 3 other wedding in the past year My best friends, my cousins and 2 weeks after my sisters hubbys friend where our son wasn't invited to which doesn't bother me in the slightest I quite enjoy having some QT with my husband and DS has a fab time at Gran and Grandas. (it would be difficult for us to get a sitter if my sister and BIL didnt invite him to the wedding but as i said earlier they both dote on him so was never a thought he wouldn't be invited).

Unfortunately as you have backed down and said the child can now go I dont think there is much you can do but grin and bear it but make it clear that your not happy about the child being there and if they make a noise to leave the ceremony as IMO thats the most important part of the day.

The phrase 'your day, your way' springs to mind. Everyone will have their opinions on this age old topic but ultimately it's one day where you can have anything/everything YOU want so if you want no children, do that and don't let others dictate :) we had kids at our wedding and two of them caused merry hell in the cathedral running up and down (neither sets of parents stopped them) during my sisters vocal solo so if you don't want them, stand your ground! X

It's your wedding and they should respect your wishes. Children are noisy and have a habit of sidetracking occasions (my 3 year old nephew did at my 1st wedding) and its your perogative to exclude them from your day if that's what you want. The way that I see it is that I'm paying for it so I'm having what I want and you don't need to justify your decisions to anyone.

As a mother of two, I wouldnt lash out at you but I would be frustrated. We dont get babysitting easily and when kids arent invited to things it means one of us has to stay behind with the kids. Usually me as I dont drive.
My two are very well behaved and when they are told to sit they do, equally another frustration is the fac people initially expect them to be badly behaved when they're really not.

That being said however its your day, it's only going to upset you if the baby starts making noise. They should respect your descision especially if they had a no baby policy at their own wedding. Offer to pay for their babysittig or something??? xx

It's your wedding, you can have no kids there if that's what you want!
totally understand where you're coming from, kids can be a big distraction and if it's quite a formal / quiet do then it could get irritating or messy.
I have two young nephews myself, my sister's kids (will be 4 and 18mths at the wedding) and I wouldn't dream of not including them in my wedding - but that's just me. I'm very close to my sister and the kids and I miss them so much as I live in another country!! So it's important to me for all of them to be there.
My wedding will be quite relaxed and informal anyway so I feel like the kids will either not be an issue or just add to the atmosphere for me. :)

You listed a whole host of reasons why children aren't invited. You don't need to give any reason, it's your wedding. We didn't invite children to ours.

I totally agree that it's "Your wedding, your way" if no children is what you want then don't let anyone guilt or bully you into changing your mind. It always leaves a sour taste if you feel you've been backed into a corner. It would be great if family could simply accept a decision instead of protesting but it's a little understandable. It must feel like a slight so I can sympathise that they are not happy. Luckily we only have 3 children at our wedding all of which are in the Bridal party. I want our 3 there but would have had to have massive brass b*lls to have said no kids at my wedding. Boy would my Mum have kicked off not to have her grandsons included and I'm sure my Bro and SIL would have been disappointed too. I can see both sides. I think you have to decide what you are most prepared to live with. The sour taste or the grief from family.

If my sister had this policy I would be unhappy, since I'm immediate family and all people who would usually babysit are immediate family so there would be no where for my 2 to go. this would probably stop me from being able to go in my personal situation since my youngest is so little and refuses bottles.

At the same time it is your day so what you decide is best for you and your oh is the way you should do it. You can't please everyone and trying to will only bring you more stress than you need. unfortunately you have to be prepared for the aftermath of what ever decision you make. The upset feelings will probably continue long after the wedding day is over. Giving in could still have the same effect though, especially if what your worried about happens I.e noise and crying ect, no one wants this when giving their vows/wedding video. If you stand firm they should eventually understand where your coming from. You shouldn't be bullied into allowing children