Wedding Forum - Having 2nd thoughts about our date....

What have you already got booked and paid deposits for? Will you lose much if you change the date?

If that is all and you don't have florists, photographers, transport etc. booked then go for it, better you're happy you have everyone there than on the day wishing you had certain people there xx

I guess this would be a personal choice. We are only having 3 children attending our wedding which will be on a Wednesday. This date falls the Wednesday before the Easter holiday for our 2 boys, the only other child there will be a family friends child who calls me "Auntie Kate", however his school holiday doesnt start until the week after our sons holidays do so it will be 2 weeks before his holiday. I will be upset if he is unable to attend however, his parents have joint custody & there is no guarantee his mum will have custody on that day anyway.

However, the most important thing for us is the date, we will have been together 8 years the day we plan to marry & from the day we got engaged we always said we will get married on our anniversary. If people are unable to attend, then thats understandable, but due to that date meaning so much to us, we are not willing to change the date for other people.

Its a personal choice hun, if your date doesnt mean too much to you, then i think that changing it is an acceptable plan for you.

Im not up to speed on the whole fining for being off school but wouldn't a wedding be an exceptional circumstance its not like the child will be missing a week or 2. The schools round here don't do trip the last week but the 2nd last week at the very latest

ive just realised my daughter will start school the week of my wedding and my wedding is on a friday but its too late to change lol my younger brothers and sister will be missing a day of school too if they go back that week, its only one day they arnt going on holiday for a week lol x

I think you should keep it given the reasons behind having it that day - It's sentimental and has a great deal of meaning for you both.. I think a wedding is a justifiable excuse xx

It seems like the date is more important to you thanhaving the children there although you want both so I can understand the decision is difficult to make. My oh works in a school so I asked him about the fine business and he said as far as he is aware that it would be classed as an unortharised absence if the children are ment to be at school and are not. These are nit rules set by the school but the gouvernment. He said the school may give allowance for say your own child but as most schools finish around 3-3:30 they wouldn't expect a child to be taken out for a wedding as they can attend later in the day. So the parents would have to be prepared to face a fine if they take a child out of school.

I know that seems a bit unfair though. X

I would speak to your family members (those who it might affect) & ask for there opinion.
If you do decide to go ahead with the weekday wedding I would suggest to the parents calling in sick rather than booking it as a holiday.

If its only for 1 day, then there should be nothing to worry about. The education department only generally fine the parents of children whos attendance is that of 94% or below... so I would speak to the school in question as they would give you info on their policies. Hope this helps!

I just spoke with the headteacher at my sons school & he said that as far as he is concerned a wedding is an exceptional circumstance as such they will definately consider the request but that "you should not worry as we do consider a wedding to be an exceptional circumstance so dont worry about it" so basically hes saying yes without actually saying it lol. i also asked if i could put in the request for my youngest aswell as my eldest, my youngest wont start school until september, so they will also be considering it on a child not currently in their care but that WILL BE in their care at the time.

This was the first time i have met the head teacher, so i think that this informal chat in the playground went quite well, it is always worth asking.

I think you need to talk to the family members and see how it affects them before changing anything and then see x

Have now decided to change our date after speaking with a couple members of the family with kids, it would be much easier, and then they can come down on the monday, hang out etc, and even have a mini holiday down in devon if they want. so come tomorrow will have to call regitras office and change date (and time) then call venue again and change it with them. and then inform everyone that the date has now changed.

Like I've said in a different thread If i was invited to a family wedding which was no kids etc I would not be able to go as the only people I trust woth her is my mum an cousin.

Called registras office today and they seemed to have changed the system from last time I called . They took the details of what I want to do and pass it on to the wedding team who will call me back in the next 7 working days. So now I have to wait a week. Hipfully they will get back sooner rather than later.

We have not given notic yet with 16 mo ths to go. So no stress there.

Have now changed that date. Registry office called back within about 10 mins after being told 7 days!
Im alot happeier about the situation now. I would of been very dissapointed if alot of people could not come due to schools etc. alot of kids in 2ndry have activity weeks and trips the last week. And have alot of people thank me since i broke the news.

Alot of them had all had letters from schools statung kids out of school apart from for illness/medical appointments wpuld be fines something like £50 per child per parent per day.

Rediculous! But all sorted now. And slot are having to travel from oxford/ london to devon.

Great news now you can relax knowing all the people you want will be there x