In the past month we've seen 5 venues I think and only liked one.
We've got 4 more left to see and h2b ses he doesnt want to go as he cant be bothered n i can choose.
Which I duno how i feel about.... i liked the idea of us going and looking around and deciding together? What happens if i pick one he doesnt like?
Im kinda upset to be honest as we were meant to be going tonight and hes literally just told me he "doesnt feel up to it"
So now im going with his mum instead as im not missing their wedding fair (next one is september)
But we have 3 more to see this sat and sun and i dont want to go without him i feel like an idiot tbh!
Anyone elses h2b left u to it? x
Happily Married! :) xxx
CommentAuthorSazzell23
I think you should question him further and get to the bottom of it hun. You need to know the proper reason not just 'he doesnt feel up to it'. Is he really down about something like work or money etc?? Or is he shy? I know most Grooms don't get that involved in weddings but he should be sharing this special time with you. The choice of venue is a really big deal as it's the biggest part of your wedding budget and I think he should be going to view the venues with you. I think you need to find out whats going on in his head over the wedding hun xx
CommentAuthorLauraJo87
I went with my mum to view ours, although Richard had been on the website and was impressed with it. He's no good at the logistical side of things so most of that has been left to me...he is not in the least built interested in table layouts, room plans etc so it would probably have been more of a hindrance him being there.
He is more excited about the food and entertainment, so I have put him in charge of that!
It can be tiring planning a wedding, and it sounds like you have really had a lot of stress over it recently, so maybe he just fancies some 'non-wedding' time? Xx
My Beating Heart Belongs To You
30 August 2013
The First Day Of My Happily Ever After
CommentAuthorLegoWife
Sounds to me like after seeing a few already he just can't be bothered. I'd be giving him a good kick up the ar5e and telling him it's his wedding as well and he needs to have some in put.
I could not be dealing with a man who has no interest in his own wedding. Let him believe it's the brides job to do it all and he'll not bother helping. Beat it out of him now lol!
~Wedding made of Lego~
*Married 30/03/13*
CommentAuthorRaggedyAnne
I would not have got my H2B to go to see 9 venues, no way!
Why dont you go and look around, and shortlist a couple and then take him to see them? once you have looked around a few you will know what you like and what you dont, and just take him to the couple that you like but cant decide on?
Lol LegoBride - I will pinch that advice from you myself as I have a feeling that is what my other halfs view is at the mo.
I agree with Raggedy Anne - go and look at them all yourself then go through all 9 and if any he hasn't seen are in your final few maybe arrange to go together in a week or so once he has had some wedding free time. Good luck xx
7 years together
6 years engaged
2 surprise arrivals
1 date set. I will finally become Mrs A in December 2013!
CommentAuthorVelcro
I agree with raggedyann too!
He might be all wedding'd out and need a breather from it, i cant imagine id be best pleased in your situation, but he may have the mentality that hes seen 4 already, how can the next however many vary that much? i dont think id want to trawl round that many places myself though, if im honest, weve already seen 2 venues, and i cant imagine anythng else living up to venue number 2, but his mum is encouraging us to view somemore, il go along.... very begrudgingly haha
Wibbly wobbly, timey wimey
*Kelbel* is my wedding twinny!
CommentAuthorLegoWife
That said, we looked up possible venues online and only went to view the one we were sure we'd end up booking. There wasn't much within our budget though and maybe we just got lucky!
~Wedding made of Lego~
*Married 30/03/13*
CommentAuthormrs clarke to be
i think you should ask him why he dont want to go other than can not be bothered cos if he does not like it then u would feel bad , i think you should make him go so he knows what you will be doing and staying xx
CommentAuthorOWB
My h2b came and sat through me trying on 30+ dresses, so I would certainly expect him to come as view as many venues as I saw necessary. It's his wedding too, and I expect full cooperation.
If only life could be one long tea break
CommentAuthormym72
Nine venues is a bit much. Like RaggedyAnne - can't you shortlist a few of your favourites for him to see? Or maybe give him the links to the websites? If they're a reputable company/venue then they'll be on the net.
CommentAuthorsuzky123
see I had the opposite prob that h2b wanted to do everything and I couldn't make anything but joint decisions but im glad he had a say. Speak to your hubby to be and stress how important this is to you x and to him and your future together
cant wait to be Mrs Evans less than 3 weeks woooo
start weight 10st 1.5 lbs
weight now 8st 4.5 lbs
total loss to date: 24.5 lbs now need to maintain!
CommentAuthorHalebob85
Leats he came to see some. My h2b hasn't been to any. Doesn't want to come yet when I tell him about them or show him pics, he develops an opinion, he's like 'don't like it' 'too exensive'. I'm looking at a few more and then will tell him the ones I like. If he stilll won't go then tough luck if he doesn't like the one I choose.
Met August 2003
Started planning 2012
Getting married 29th June 2014
CommentAuthorLinzi-jo
I think you need to have a word with him hun. Your venue is always going to be the place that you and your h2b got married, so in my eyes this makes this one of the most important decisions of the whole wedding! My h2b came with me to see ours and he was actually the one who pushed to have the reception venue (I got my church so it was only fair). He needs to have a say in the major decisions and this is one of them. I think there may be more of an underlying problem here than just not wanting to go and see them. Stress to him it is his wedding too, not just yours, therefore he needs a say in things aswell, he cant just leave it all up to you. Hope you get it sorted soon xxx
Got together 14.02.2008
Got engaged 31.12.2010
Will become a Mrs on 30.08.2014 xxxxxx
CommentAuthorJennyTembo
i went with my sil2b hun, think blokes are all the same and hes says he trusts me to do it and that my sil2b would have more to offer with input and thoughts and the reason it wasn't both of them is because sil2b has a 2 year old and who ever came with me the other would take my little nephew 2b to maccydee's lol so think that swung it for him..lol xx
looking forward to being Mrs Embo :)
CommentAuthorGazza 122
Im on the fence with this one lol, i agree with what ur saying in that he should be interested in the venues etc, but i think its more to the point of 'why is he not interested in the wedding' .perhaps he is all wedding'd out lol, who knows? i would defo make a shortlist of the venues YOU LIKE first, and then book appointments for the few you know are in with a running. Your H2B probably feels a bit daunted by so many desicions, break it down a bit n say this one...........or this one . I would certanly tell him that its BOTH of yours day, and not left just to you to decide on one of the most important factors of it. x
CommentAuthorbridalmiss
I agree, men are a lot simpler in decision making - I chose one, showed him the website and then he agreed to view - thankfully the day we went he agreed with the choice and we booked it there and then - but guys definitely aren't that good at window shopping so you need to shortlist for him first!
CommentAuthorOfficially Mrs M
thats the best way is you to short list them then take him back to choose, thats what i did as my OH worked weekends so i went round and looked at all the ones i was interested in and then i got him to come round the ones i really liked on a weekend when he had some time off
8th September 2012 I married my best friend
1st September 2014 our little family grew by one
Women are made to be loved, not understood. - Oscar Wilde
CommentAuthorb2bnicola
Hey, well I went last night with his mum(!) and it was amazing! The best venue ive seen yet, it was elegant yet subtle. The staircase into the cermony was just the nicest touch - then the eve reception room was just totally different it looked like a nightclub - suited me down to a T! I got back all ready to talk about it and he was asleep (!) at 8pm. Eugh! So still haven't spoken to him about it. Hes agreed to come to the two tomorrow, and we're sacking off the sunday one as its just too expensive accommodation wise for our guests. So 2 more, then he will have to come and see the other venue again if those 2 are no good! Hes given no explanation as of yet as to why he wudnt come. Maybe he was just tired. Im just getting all excited to book things as after me and my ex broke up I didnt think id find someone again! Maybe im just overly excited and need to tone it down! The venue last night that I went too had the two dates that we are interested in free the day before wen I emailed, then last night the woman informed me one of them had gone the hour before we got there! So it is important for us to book our venue soon! Esp as the weekend we're after is the May bank holiday(!) x
Happily Married! :) xxx
CommentAuthorSteffie
That's deffo a bloke thing! They don't like shopping so why should they like shopping for venues, coz essentially that's what we're making them do! We saw 5 venues together and instantly both fell i love with our venue on our drive up to the venue so LUCKY!!!
xxx
CommentAuthoremmaaa
b2bnicola, if he was asleep when you got back and had already said he didn't feel up to it, maybe he's come down with something, or is just feeling a bit washed out? To be honest, I agree with RA, in general, men aren't as picky about these things as we are. Try looking at it from his point of view, he has probably seen several suitable venues amongst the ones you've already seen, but in the end if you're not happy it's not right, so there isn't much point him being there until you have found some you do like! I think he'd definitely be more compliant if you'd already eliminated some and had narrowed it down to a few that it genuinely might be, rather than just visiting venue after venue that isn't necessarily suitable. My h2b was getting a bit angsty after the first half a dozen venues we saw, I completely accept that planning-wise I am far more interested in the details than he is, I do the basic legwork and then we decide together. As far as he's concerned all the razmataz of the day is secondary to the 20 minutes it takes for us to sign on the dotted line.
CommentAuthorLlosa
Awww, hun you need to have a chat and find out why....its the most important bit after the actual ceremony....thats were you will show up as husband and wife....maybe explain that it is important to you and that you'd be hurt if he didn't come...my h2b was a lil cautious in the beginning but after the awkward looking around the first few venues and also he thought we were doing it too far in advance but when the venues told us how far in advance they booked up he got more involved.
Really hope he gets more hands on for you x
CommentAuthorMrsNoz2b
We sat and looked on the net for a good month and came up with a short list of 3. Do you have a type of venue you like? It just seems alot of venues i think my head would be spinning lol. Maybe hes just had enough of looking, i wouldnt have thought hes not interested. Maybe you should sit down together and decide what type of day your bothlooking for. It definetly needs to be a decision you make together, this is one of the most important day in your lives and you need to both be comfortable on your big day xx
