Hi, My future mother in law is trying to control my and my htb wedding plans. She wants us to not get married until I have a job despite being a student, any you give me any advice?
We've been engaged for 3 years now and we are fed up of waiting to please his mum.
Thanks
CommentAuthorFlossie
I understand where she is coming from, but at the end of the day its yours and your h2b's decision and nobody else's. It's not like you are rushing into anything having been engaged for 3 years already. Life is too short to wait around for things to happen and to wait for the 'perfect' moment - is there even such a thing? Sometimes you just need to take the plunge and do what will make you happy!
I always wanted to wait until we could afford to buy our own house until we got married. But I got tired of waiting. As long as you can afford it and not get yourselves into debt or financial difficulty then there's no reason why you shouldn't start organising your wedding :)
When are you looking to get married? x
Happily married
18th June 2016
xx
CommentAuthorMrsBull2B
I am in the exact same position, we have decide to cut costs and reduce numbers rather than postpone the wedding yet again (its been postponed twice already) yet when he told his mam that the wedding is not postponed anymore and it is going ahead, she just mentions money. She has not contacted either of us regarding the wedding since he told her, which was last week, and we are normally really close. We are both going back to education, and he has just started temp work. I have worked finances out, and I'm positive we can afford it, wouldn't of bought little extras otherwise. Do what you want, dont let anyone dictate when you get wed
xx
Met 5th Sept 2005
Got together 10th May 2011
Got Engaged 14th Feb 2012
Getting Married 13th June 2015
CommentAuthorElinor Claire
If she is just concerned that you won't cope before you have a job, maybe you can put a plan together to show her that you've thought it through and how you're going to make ends meet.
I knew a couple who got engaged not long before me, who I thought would wait until they both graduated, as she is final year BSc (will finish as soon as she does a couple of resits), and he is doing a PhD and is nearly complete. However they went ahead, and although neither is working they seem to be managing pretty well on her student finance and his grant. She will be starting a PGCE in physics soon, which comes with good financial support, and he should get a pretty decent job.
If you can afford to get married now without cutting back so much that you regret it and wish you'd done it differently later then I would say go ahead.
30th August 2014 was the best birthday ever.
It was the day that I became Mrs. Dixon.
CommentAuthorWhovianbride
edited
I don't see what her problem is unless your expecting her to pay.
Met June 2009 on my Birthday,Met again July 2009 and got
together, May 2010 Moved in,Jan 2011 got pregnant,
August 2011 Got our own place, 2011 Had our Baby Girl,
Dec 2011 Got engaged, July 2015 Getting married! Yay!
If you and your H2B are paying it's not her wedding so no say ! However I understand how it can be awkward, I would suggest to H2B to have him talking to her (or both together) explaining that you feel it's the right time as you are in the position to plan your wedding, if she brings up the job thing just say we have taken all things into account and we are ok to go ahead so there is no need to bring that up again :)
Somehow always connected , finally became friends .
Friends became soul mates :)
Engaged 6th July 2013
<3 <3 Married my best friend 11/7/2015 <3 <3
CommentAuthorVictoriaL46
In my opinion as long as you can afford it without getting yourself into debt then I say go ahead.
Met in Nov 2005
Engaged 13th June 2013
Becomes Mrs Stewart on 10th Aug 2015 Honeymoon in Florida!
My Diary Thread: My Alice in Wonderland Wedding Diary
CommentAuthorGemmaS890
Myself and the h2b did actually consider asking for some help financially from both our families but that made us think they could try and dictate what we could do so we did the best thing all round and added another year onto our original date so we could do it all ourselves. Its your special day and his mum should see that. After all u didnt tell her what to do for her wedding so why should she do it to u
CommentAuthorGemmaR81
Do it, its your day, you and your h2b get married when you want. My h2b and myself have set a limit and we will stick to that, neither of our mums are putting any money to it, so OUR decisions. We are all always here for a chat xx
CommentAuthorAndreaE20
Im lucky my mums fab and MIL is wonderful my mum is putting pennys away for us but I know she wont try t butt in as she knows how much this big day means to me and H2B and how personal we want our day to be
Future Mrs Ryan
First Date 4th July 2009
Asked me to be his wife 6th Augest 2014
Hoping to be his wife on 4th July 2017
CommentAuthorCharlotteE98
If you think you can afford it go for it. We've been engaged for almost 6 years and have had to put off organising ours because other things got in the way. I really wish we could've done it 4 or 5 years ago like we planned though :o/
CommentAuthorVelcro
It's not her decision to make. She can give advice but don't let her dictate your life or plans. If you can afford it, then go for it.
Wibbly wobbly, timey wimey
*Kelbel* is my wedding twinny!
CommentAuthorbride2b90
Its is not her decision its yours,
I am a student and both me and my H2B are part time workers, I we have worked out money and we are having what we love and can afford. I certainly would not let others rule your plans, at the end of it she's not getting married you are x
I met my soul mate in school, after chasing him for 18months
We got together 15th September 06,
We celebrated our son Jacob 29th October 10,
He proposed 15th June 14, We marry 09th July 16
