I have been told today by my sil 2b that she has brought her 2 daughters dresses to wear for our wedding and she has gone for the same colours as out BM's and fg's! What the hell! Also she has brought them from a China site so I am guessing that they are like bm dresses! I can't beloved she is trying to make them look as though they are bm's. There was a reason we didn't ask them in the 1st place. I am so upset, if I didn't already have mine and bm dresses I would have changed the colour scheme!
X
Cant wait to be married
must loose weight!!
start weight 12st 12lb
current weight 9st 10lbs
CommentAuthorjo Santa
Oh that's so unfair. Make sure that your girls have flowers, or something in their hair - some bit of sparkle or pizzazz that makes them stand out. Also make sure they're not in the bridal party photo's. Deliberately have a series of photo's done with you and your bm's.
My ex sister in law did this to my other sister in law a few years ago - except she refused to allow her daughter to be flower girl, changed her mind at the last minute and said she'd get the dress. She sent her in an oyster pink dress which clashed with the other bm's red dresses deliberately and to be honest, there was little to be said without causing a family row, so we all said nothing. At the end of the day, everyone could see who were bridesmaids and they didn't think she was.
I think that unless someone in your family has the guts to tell her it's wrong and unfair, then you'll just have to outdo her.
Jo Santa
CommentAuthoremmyle
Oh dear. Did she know wat the bms dresses looked like wen she brought them? X
CommentAuthorlisa123
That's the only thing we can do :(
X
Cant wait to be married
must loose weight!!
start weight 12st 12lb
current weight 9st 10lbs
CommentAuthorlisa123
Yes she did emmyle, she came round unexpectedly when my daughter was trying
hers on X
Cant wait to be married
must loose weight!!
start weight 12st 12lb
current weight 9st 10lbs
Thats really quite rude of her, have you spoken to her about it, i think you should. Have her dresses arrived yet? I would tell her how you feel about it and ask her nicely to change the dresses. That mite cause arguements tho, but i cant believe she would do that after seein the colour of bms dresses. X
CommentAuthorlinzmum
maybe you could make a point about it on your wedding day by thanking them BMs but making a biggish thing about naming each one and why they were choosen etc. that way your guests will be in no doubt who is and who isn't a bm....of course it would have to be done tactfully but she will get the hint :) are you giving your bm's sash's or wraps? and like previous comments try to bling the bm's up a bit more, not really much else you can do if you don't want to buy new.
Soon to be joined together as the Wheeler family, can't wait
Doing thing our way xxxx
CommentAuthorMrs van der Lee
I'd do as linzmum says - make an effort to ensure people know who your BMs are. How utterly selfish of her to do that, it's ridiculous.
Sam & Adele
Mr and Mrs van der Lee
10-08-2013
CommentAuthorbecky -mrs firth
i wud tell her thats ure bm colour and for them not to wear that dress
Engaged 27th November 2010
Hen Do Newcastle 2nd June 2012
Marrying the man of my dreams 11th August 2012!
Honeymoon To Jamaica 14th October 2012
CommentAuthorlisa123
Thanks ladies, my bm's will def stand out from the rest. H2b'a family have not been bothered about our wedding at all since we didn't ask sil 2n's children to be involved, that's probably why she has done it!
X
Cant wait to be married
must loose weight!!
start weight 12st 12lb
current weight 9st 10lbs
CommentAuthorMrs van der Lee
i agree with becky also, tell her not the let them wear it - she damned well knew it was your BMs colours!
Sam & Adele
Mr and Mrs van der Lee
10-08-2013
CommentAuthorlisa123
Just had a thought, what do you think about putting at the bottom of my invites something like
Please avoid burgundy and ivory X
Cant wait to be married
must loose weight!!
start weight 12st 12lb
current weight 9st 10lbs
CommentAuthorKat831
That is such an attention seeking, selfish thing to do! Don't let it get to you hunni x
Friends since 1999, together since 2007 :D
Mum to Twin girls and my little boy
Step mum to an amazing big boy
CommentAuthorKat831
Love the invite idea!
Friends since 1999, together since 2007 :D
Mum to Twin girls and my little boy
Step mum to an amazing big boy
CommentAuthorMrs van der Lee
yeah, pop it on the invite!!!
Sam & Adele
Mr and Mrs van der Lee
10-08-2013
CommentAuthorAtaraxia
And you could, if you do the invite thing.just say out and out that if she doesn't change the dresses, she might as well not bother coming because your venue has been told not to allow anyone in if they are dressed in the colours of the bridal party.
Got married 27th June and blessed on July 5th 2012
Finally Mrs M :3
Love, love... Here we are.
CommentAuthorcherry82
I cant believe she even had the brass neck to do that. I would definitely do what linzmum said and make sure everyone knows who the bm & fg's are x
CommentAuthorlisa123
Ataraxia, I am liking that! X
Cant wait to be married
must loose weight!!
start weight 12st 12lb
current weight 9st 10lbs
CommentAuthorMrs van der Lee
I've just been talking to my housemates about this and theyve said to tell her outright to change the dress or not bother coming but that it downright nasty. What a disgusting thing shes doing it's pure jealousy. xxx
Sam & Adele
Mr and Mrs van der Lee
10-08-2013
CommentAuthorUnknown
i think she is annoyed her girls are not involved. my siter was like that. i had my bm in purple and because she wasnt a bm she went out a bought a dress in the exact colour to wear. we had a huge row and i said that is she wore it she wouldnt be allowed in and i meant it!
i would tell her the same that they cant come if they wear those dresses. if they are from a china site they wont be that expensive either xx
CommentAuthorsuzky123
I would clearly put something like 'to save unnecessary embarrassment, please avoid the bridal part colours of ......' and if she phones up winging saying she already has them, just tell her well if she wants to come she will have to change (as you will be following atraxias advice) and if she doesnt want to change and not come then that is fine too. It is a sign of disrespect to clash and if she has a fit at yo0u trying to make you out to be the one in the wrong, then give her what for back and do not budge! It is tough she has spent money. She has known the colour scheme so she could have easily avoided it and saved her money, and as I said, it is disrespectful to clash with the bm's etc.
cant wait to be Mrs Evans less than 3 weeks woooo
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CommentAuthorTsukijin
I like ataraxia's idea! what a childish woman trying to get the spotlight on her kids on your day. Also like the sash idea. nice bright ones :P
eru, shiteiru ka? shinigami wa ringo shika tabenai?
^_^
CommentAuthorsuzky123
why does she have to be so immature to try and get them to 'blend in' Its actually very sad when you think about it! Stupidity of some people is beyond me.
cant wait to be Mrs Evans less than 3 weeks woooo
start weight 10st 1.5 lbs
weight now 8st 4.5 lbs
total loss to date: 24.5 lbs now need to maintain!
CommentAuthorAtaraxia
I'm glad my idea was amusing to some of you haha..l I think it really is completely down to her, it's considered rude to show up in bridal party colours unless it says on the invite for guests to wear a specific colour or anything like that... I know the are a few girls on here who have asked for their guests to come in bright colours only, or black and white only... and they have had guests say they will not stick to that too! Our own Lisa (mummy2Olivia) had her cousin wanting to turn up in a wedding dress... Floor length white wedding dress!
I think some guests really will just go out of their way to bring attention onto themselves and can't let someone else have their way for even one minute!
Got married 27th June and blessed on July 5th 2012
Finally Mrs M :3
Love, love... Here we are.
CommentAuthorMrs van der Lee
If anyone does that at my wedding they will be removed!! Arghhh!
Sam & Adele
Mr and Mrs van der Lee
10-08-2013
CommentAuthorsuzky123
That is stupid to try and turn up in a wedding dress. I had an issue with my mum wanting to put my moh in a red wedding dress..... I couldnt believe how stupid that attitude was and to this day, she still cant understand why I wont allow it. It is not rocket science to not clash with any of the bridal party. Tell her straight that those dresses are not acceptable and please dont let her guilt trip you or threaten that she wont come. If she threatens, call her bluff and say 'oh that's a real shame you feel that way but I will take you off the list if that is what you want'. Therefore, re-placing it on her and then family cant accuse you of being the b!
cant wait to be Mrs Evans less than 3 weeks woooo
start weight 10st 1.5 lbs
weight now 8st 4.5 lbs
total loss to date: 24.5 lbs now need to maintain!
CommentAuthorMrs van der Lee
^^^^^ well said!
Sam & Adele
Mr and Mrs van der Lee
10-08-2013
CommentAuthorOWB
A friend of mine got married earlier this year and one of her aunties turned up in a long white dress with her hair styled like a bride and a wrist flower. If that happens at mine I'll be fuming. People are so inconsiderate at times.
If only life could be one long tea break
CommentAuthorsuzky123
was the auntie allowed in? I would have told her to get changed and come back later and if she refused, say well dont come back at all. How rude of the auntie?
cant wait to be Mrs Evans less than 3 weeks woooo
start weight 10st 1.5 lbs
weight now 8st 4.5 lbs
total loss to date: 24.5 lbs now need to maintain!
CommentAuthorMrs van der Lee
I would have kicked off big style. Wouldnt care who they were they wouldve been removed!
Sam & Adele
Mr and Mrs van der Lee
10-08-2013
CommentAuthorMrsRay2be
Thats terrible, think shes got a bit of the green eyed symptom going on there!! Not fair her trying to push others into the spotlight when they obviously never got asked to be in the spotlight! Its your wedding, not her's, how dare she try make decisions at your wedding...I feel angry for you hun, I can't stand people like that. I agree with you, put it on the invite in big bold writing so she gets the hint, and if she don't like it she knows what she can do lol! xx
CommentAuthorFuture mrs mac
Did the cousin turn up in her wedding dress?
Suppose you wouldn't notice if someone looked like a bride at your wedding untill after but you could accidentely spill red wine on them ;)
I would def do the invite idea but if they do come in those dresses everyone will just think its pathetic and attention seeking - don't let it spoil your day xx
CommentAuthorMrs van der Lee
"great aunt battleaxe" i am literally laughing my bum off overhere!
Sam & Adele
Mr and Mrs van der Lee
10-08-2013
CommentAuthorsuzky123
it just annoys me that so many families act in this way. You would think they would try to be accomodating.
cant wait to be Mrs Evans less than 3 weeks woooo
start weight 10st 1.5 lbs
weight now 8st 4.5 lbs
total loss to date: 24.5 lbs now need to maintain!
CommentAuthorMrs van der Lee
im no-nonsense. anyone tries to screw up my day will be shown the door!
Sam & Adele
Mr and Mrs van der Lee
10-08-2013
CommentAuthorMrs van der Lee
hahahahahahaha!!!!!
Sam & Adele
Mr and Mrs van der Lee
10-08-2013
CommentAuthorAtaraxia
Omg mrsboyd2b! Hahahahah. Too funny!
No man likes a woman to be smarter... What does she think this is, 1950?
Got married 27th June and blessed on July 5th 2012
Finally Mrs M :3
Love, love... Here we are.
CommentAuthorMrs van der Lee
my H2B openly admits im smarter, i use up to 3 syllabul words atleast twice a day!!!!
Sam & Adele
Mr and Mrs van der Lee
10-08-2013
CommentAuthorAtaraxia
Get back in Her cupboard hahahahah pmsl oh Lordy hahaha.
Got married 27th June and blessed on July 5th 2012
Finally Mrs M :3
Love, love... Here we are.
CommentAuthorMrs van der Lee
mrsboyd2b you make me laugh so much!!
Sam & Adele
Mr and Mrs van der Lee
10-08-2013
CommentAuthorsuzky123
very good haha
cant wait to be Mrs Evans less than 3 weeks woooo
start weight 10st 1.5 lbs
weight now 8st 4.5 lbs
total loss to date: 24.5 lbs now need to maintain!
CommentAuthorMrs van der Lee
hahaha!!! same in my family :)
Sam & Adele
Mr and Mrs van der Lee
10-08-2013
CommentAuthorlisa123
Thanks for your advice ladies, I have decided that I am going to try and put it to the back of my head now, really can't be bothered with her immaturity
Xx
Cant wait to be married
must loose weight!!
start weight 12st 12lb
current weight 9st 10lbs
CommentAuthorSkamer
I feel for you Lisa, as everyone else has said, Ataraxia is spot on with the invite. The only word of caution I would suggest is when/if she phones ranting let your h2b deal with her, if he will stand up to her that is! lol
CommentAuthormunchkinpie
Having had the MIL and SIL from hell when I married when i was younger I can totally sympathise on this one!
I just have to say that knowing that she has already gone ahead and bought dresses when she knew your colour scheme etc then I very much doubt putting a colour code on the invites will make a blind bit of difference to her. In fact if the rest of the family is like her and anything like my Ex In Laws then they will all traipse in on the day wearing exactly what you have asked them not to!!
My experience taught me you just have to rise above it (and its really blinking hard sometimes) - my comeback would be to have a little dedication to the real bridal party on the days order of service or running order for day if you are having them to give out, or on your website if you have one and then on the day id invite real BMs and FGs up individually to give them a little gift . Also make sure you have a word in the photographers shell like on the day and make him clear on who is the bridal party!
Working on a 3 dream plan for the next 5 years!
Dream 1 = My gorgeous Mr P proposed - 4/9/11 Sydney Harbour
Dream 2 = Getting Married Easter 2012 by Bonnie Loch Lomond
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