Hi i have three children 24, 21 and 11 my son the youngest is my concern, my h2b and i have won a holiday to malta which is to be taken the week after our wedding, it's a 5 star spa resort half board etc and looks stunning. I originally said i wouldn't go unless we could get my son included but as it's a spa resort it's adults only. My son has no contact with his father so it's left to my daughters to look after him get him to school etc, they are fine with this but my son is extremely close to me and has only spent a couple of nights away from me before( i haven't told him about it yet) I just don't know whether to go or give the holiday up, i can't bear the thought of him upset the whole time we are there but then we will be giving a £2,000 plus holiday up which seems silly as we are not exactly rolling in money! Advice please.
CommentAuthorSuzieS
No grandma/granddad, auntie/uncles that he will feel comfortable with? I'm sure he will be fine. Also some space might be good for both of you to know that you can do things without each other, he is 11 so old enough to understand. And its a free holiday you can't give that up!! I say go :] xx
CommentAuthorCharlieBe-Cool
We have two boys who will be 7 and 3 when we marry. I'm nervous about leaving them, but thats because the only people who can have them if we go away (my mum and dad) dont spend hardly any time alone with them so dont really 'know' them that well. They have only had them a handful of times while we've gone for a meal and only ONCE had them overnight (eldest is 5 now). Having sais that, if I had a free holiday, as long as it waa no more than a week (otherwise id go out of my mind with worry!) id probably go and just 'check in' regularly.
Met my prince charming - May 2002
Finally tying the knot - July 2015
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CommentAuthorHappyBunny
If you want to go hun then talk 2 him and see how he feels hes old enough to understand hun and as long as hes close to his sisters, just try not to make him feel pushed out. Mine will be 5 and 20 months and we are just having a family holiday after xx
CommentAuthorLauraJo87
I can see its hard, and he might be upset about it, but at eleven he is old enough to understand....although he might not be happy about it, it might be a good experience and give him a bit of independence as well as some quality time with his big sisters.
Make sure your sisters have nice things planned for him to do, ie baking night or movie night and promise to keep in touch regularly!
He probably will be a bit glum for the first few days, but that's all part and parcel of it, I'm afraid. You shouldn't feel guilty at all - you only get one honeymoon and I'm sure that you would regret not going.
Maybe soften the blow with the promise of a 'family moon' at a later date?
It may be the first time, but there needs to come a first time!
Think of this as a step towards your son's development! He's at an age where he probably will be excited at some freedom from his mum! And, this will help with his confidence when he's in secondary school. Otherwise you're at risk of developing a mummy's boy!
If he's back at school, maybe speak to a freind's parent and ask if he can stay with him/her and try and arrange some stuff for him to do-this could be the start of a new hobby for him!
How do you know how he will react? It's best to tell him - he is probably expecting you to go on honeymoon! And if he kicks off, you need to reassure him if he's upset. If he's angry, then you need to be a firm mum and put him back in his box.
Sometimes for the long term benefit of a child's development you need to take short term hits... he'll probably forget about it... Perhaps organise, as someone else said, a min holiday later in the year to something like centreparcs or a trip down to London for him or something.
Malta is absolutley fantastic... we stayed in Valetta and it's where we got engaged! You are incredibly lucky to have one a holiday there! You have no idea how much so...you really CANNOT give this up!.,... but if you do...let me have it! ;)
Good luck!
And we lived happily ever after!
CommentAuthoralmost a year wife!!
Do not give up your holiday!
He's 11 not 5!!!!! I'm sure he can cope for a week without you!
Ill marry my hero
CommentAuthorMrsGothBride
you have to go on this holiday! I agree with pretty much everything Valentine said. Your girls Will look after him and a week Will fly by end he'll be back at school then so his days Will be filled up. Take a tablet or laptop with you and Skype him, he Will be perfectly fine!
When we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours
we join up with them and fall into mutually satisfying
weirdness and call it love, true love.
5th September 2013
CommentAuthorElinor Claire
I'm sure he'll be ok. Your daughters will be able to provide emotional support as well if he struggles, but he might find it really exciting.
30th August 2014 was the best birthday ever.
It was the day that I became Mrs. Dixon.
CommentAuthorJanetM46
Thanks everyone for your replies the are very reassuring, i think i'm going to tell him sooner rather than later so he can digest the information, he starts high school in september and i don't want him stressed out about it. I agree it is silly to turn down the honeymoon i think after the initial disappointment he'll be ok. There is no family no aunty's uncle's grandparents etc so it's down to my daughter's i'm afraid,they're great girls though and i'm sure they will do a fine job looking after him.
CommentAuthorWhovianbride
I think hes more than old enough to stay at home and your daughters are more than old enough to look after him! X maybe ask one of his friends parents if maybe he could say with them a night ir so, so hes with his friend, should make it mire fun, and guve your daughters some free time!
Met June 2009 on my Birthday,Met again July 2009 and got
together, May 2010 Moved in,Jan 2011 got pregnant,
August 2011 Got our own place, 2011 Had our Baby Girl,
Dec 2011 Got engaged, July 2015 Getting married! Yay!
CommentAuthorFernP61
He should be fine with your other children x
CommentAuthorlala "mod" bunni
To be honest i think at 11 it would be good for him to be away from you ( oh thats sounds harsh ) i mean it will be good for him to do that man of the house thing
Just wanted to update everyone that was kind enough to reply, my daughter asked my son earlier how he would feel about mum going on honeymoon he replied " whoop whoop a week without parents yea" he then asked if we would be doing lots of kissing on honeymoon she said yes that's what honeymoons are for, he said yuk i don't want to see that then! lol. So the seed has been planted now and he seems fine with it, so sometime this week i'll tell him we have booked a honeymoon. I'm really pleased and relieved at his response.
CommentAuthorTori
I agree with Lala a week away will probably do him a world of good and you may even find that he will love the independence. Let him know how dull he would find the break.
