hello my lovelies havent been on much this weekend

right so nehoo, its coming up on thursday as the 4th anniversary of my dad's death...tbh still havent and probably wont ever get over it cause it was so sudden, he was so young and as was i and his only daughter too..im tryin to move on and enjoy my weddin planning.

went to my best mate's wedding on saturday..had a fab time, dancing like a loon lol then at one point, i seen her dancing with her dad that she's not got the best r/ship with anyway..h2b wasnt' there due to childcare problems and i just felt alone * even though i knew a lot of people adn sittin wtih my h2b's auntie uncle and cousins that i know well*...went up to have a slow dance with my best friend and that was it, i just got really teary and explained im finding it hard and she was so lovely and im b lessed to have her as a best friend *to which after i tried moppin my tears up , the weddin co ordinator came gave me a hug syin that he cant have anyone crying and not geting on lol*

then i did it again just as we were leaving, went into the bathroom and had a sob to which nik my best friend came in, and we sat for 5 mins..

to the point of this post lol...i really don't think im goin to cope walking down the aisle and saying my vows...i think the tears are going to get in the way so much and make me look like a pleb

anythin i can do to try and prevent the tears lol x

i dont think anyone can hold back such strong emotions. alot of brides and grooms cry at their wedding, its only natural. just remember when you are saying your vows that you are in no rush. if you feel the tears coming on, look up and take a deep breath. im sure you will get through it fine. x

aww becca big hugs i dont think theres much you can do to stop the tears an i think they will understand why you are so emotional xx ps you're best friend sounds fab :) xx

aw chic sending you a big hug,i like alsbettys idea lol ul prob laff ur socks of!!but u will find it hard you just got to be strong its natural i think for brides to cry on there wedding day i cry watching people get married lol!!just do what jellytot said look up take deep breath and ul be fine xxxx

i think most ppl get emotional so dont worry embrace it just shows it means alot to you and if you want have a nice pic of ur dad in the room when you get married a cpl of my friends did that and said it was nice to have it there to see bigs hugsssss xx

he will understand hun he knows how hard it is for u its an emotional day even more so for u he will prob cry too lol xxx

I've not got a Dad either and my best friend is walking me down the aisle. On the day you will be emotional about a lot of things but that is what weddings are all about. Your dad would be proud of you so hold your head up high and don't feel alone because your hubby will be there for you. x x

aww thanks again girls...

tbh i dont think ive actually ever grieved properly cause i fell pregnant 6 months after he passed away...since then ive been busy being a mum ..tried councelling didnt work for me, i had post natal depression and was attneding a support group for a year..but still not ok really inside x

big hugs hunni xx

i would say if you want to cry when walking down the aisle, then cry! you will be surrounded by all your family everyone will understand why it is emotional for you you dont need to worry about looking stupid. you are so strong for coping without your dad he will be so proud of you whether you are crying or not :) x

Hiya BrideBecca

i lost my dad 3 years go and was also very young but getting married next September the month he was born :).... i can totally sympathise with you and respect how you are feeling, it was one of the first things i thought about when he passed away was that he was never going to be able to walk me down the aisle, but what i do know is that like my dad, yours would want you to think of him and how proud he is of you, and on one of the most important days of your life he isnt going to miss it and thats what keeps me going, i always want to make it special for my mum so i have a few suprises for her too which i know would also make my dad smile... i hope i have helped in some way. xx

Well its expected you'll miss him and tbh I shouldn't expect to get over him. I lost my mum in January and yeah its a real struggle sometimes to be "normal".

I think there will be times at the wedding where I'll get emotional and I'll be requesting the DJ not to play a particular song (was the song at the funeral) as I think it will make things worse for my whole family not just me.

I hope I will be able to think positively like that she's watching me even though she's not there although I'm not Christian or anything which I am hoping will help me through the day when my emotions catch up with me.

Maybe thinking of your dad like that will help you ?? but I believe they are with you in your heart (with love) and in your head (with thoughts and memories) at least. :)