the last few days i have been really down and stressed.

I have had enough of planning the whole stupid wedding and couldnt care less about it right now!

just wondering if any of you have felt like this. i would be more than happy to cancel it and just go away and do it to be honest.
h2b isnt helping, he thinks im being an immature pratt his words! he doesnt understand how stressful it is. my mum said yesterday she will help with the planning as she hasnt helped at all yet and was shocked when i said the planning side of it is done!

i am fed up waiting for people to rsvp to the day bit. i asked for rsvp's by end march, still waiting for quite a few!
Right now i really do just want to go somewhere and get married so it is out the way and i can go back to normal!

sorry for rant

I've felt like that quite a few times, it become's all so much and it effect's you in silly ways and all you want to do is forget about it.

I stepped back for a while, tried to forget about it and it did help but I suppose that's a little difficult for you as your's is a lot closer but maybe try it for a for days. Have some "you" time.

Write down all the reason's why you are marrying Ed, what you love about him so much, as much positive stuff as you can, read through it and remind yourself why you are putting yourself through all of this stress

As for the RSVP's, just stick something on your facebook status reminding people to RSVP and send txt's/emails around, just chase them up, some people may of genuinely forgot. Don't worry about looking pushy, they have to expect it! Once you have done that, just try and ignore the wedding for a little while

I really hope you start feeling better about it soon, it's such a crappy way to feel

x x x x

Ok first of all personally id take a day or two off from anything wedding related, including here!

Then when you come back make alist of everyone who hasnt rsvp'd along with their numbers or even emails and get your mum to ring round to ask if they are coming (she wanted to help so give her the stress).....but if they dont give you a yes or a no when you phone say right well the venue needs numbers tomorrow, so your not coming (just tell them that even if its not true).

After that make a list of what you need to do over the next 3 months and try to spread it out as much as possiable so it gets done but your not stressing trying to get it all done at once............
............but most importantly try to relax, have a glass of wine and just chill hunni!

thanks everyone! mel...ed sounds the same as dan. wants to invite loads of people that he doesnt see anymore because he went to their wedding or because they will get upset about it.

I have put things on facebook and ed told me i need to stop putting negative sh*t on there. i have sent reminders to everyone asking for the rsvp on facebook, text and email and still nothing. i cant use the exuse that the venue needs numers as 3 cousins work there and they are some of the people not replying. not even answering messages on fb but they have updated their status so i now they will have seen it.

i really dont think we are going to be able to afford to pay the rest when it is due to be honest. ed spent £900 on olympic tickets a few weeks ago and that money in his bank was for the rest of honeymoon and photographer!

my mum has now sent messages to my cousins saying we need numbers as we will invite other people if they cant come.
one of my best friends lives in andover and he told me he was coming for the last 2 years and then said 2 weeks ago he doesnt think he will as he needs to get back to andover on the sunday to pick his son up at lunch! well i have done that journey in an hour before! he told me he would tell me by the end of week 2 weeks ago for def and havnt heard a thing but he has poked me on facebook so know he has his phone on him!

shelby...i really wish we had just gone away! i really cant be dealing with this stress and just cry whenever i am alone!

Thanks Hails...ive started having a drink in the evening to try and chill which i dont normally but h2b told me to as it will help.

xx

im in chesham near hemel hemstead. have done it in about hour 5 with no traffic.

hugs, im always saying i wish we had eloped xx

I think the closer you get to the day the worse it is and you just can't wait to get it over and done with. It is stressful getting everything sorted and so many people organised but you have to keep your mind focused on why you are doing all this in the first place. The stress isn't always going to be there. x x x

Oh hun im sorry you feel that way, but with so much to sort before your big day its no wonder you get tearful, its so understandable and as brides to be we do understand, all of us getting married at different times but all of us want the same thing - for our day to be perfect, for everything to run like clockwork and for us to be happy,smiling and relaxed. Jo is right the stress wont always be there, its just getting close and you are understandly stressed. We are all here to help you through if you need it, I know i havent been here long but If you feel like a rant and a rave, i can take it. : ) x

thanks claire. going to speak to ed tonight and if he really does want the wedding like this then he is going to have to help me and pull his finger out and start to save aswell and that will mean cutting down the amount he goes out like i have!

jo- i spoke to my mum and she said planning a wedding is one of the biggest stresses you will ever go through! i never would have thought it would be this stressful though.
when she married my dad they got married in a registry office and reception at home and she said invites went out 2 weeks before the wedding and if people didnt reply she didnt care!

i have given people till the end of this week and if they havnt rsvp'd im taking it as a no! i dont think i can be much fairer!

Re the RSVPs, rather than posting messages on FB, which people can miss, or even sending texts, I would actually call people, and I would be quite blunt: say something like 'Hi, just wondering if you got the invite to our wedding OK? It's just I asked for RSVPs by the end of March and still haven't heard, so I was wondering if I should assume you can't make it?'; if they say they've received them and will RSVP asap, or something like that, rather than saying then and there that they definitely can/can't make it, simply say 'I'm afraid I need an answer now; as I said we did ask for RSVPs by the end of March so I can't wait any longer, if you can't tell me today I'm afraid we'll have to mark you down as unable to attend'.

Sorry, but people should know by now if they can or can't come: IMPO, unless you know you have something booked ie another wedding or a holiday, or are say, waiting for a date for a big operation, then basically, you are available and should be RSVPing as soon as you get the invite. If people can't be bothered to respond, esp when pushed, then frankly I'd question if they want to be there, and why you're bothering spending money on them. That might sound harsh, but I won't be pussy-footing around when it comes to RSVPs, if people haven't replied by the date I've given, I'll be doing what I suggested above.

Great posts barbie86 and MrsWalker2be : )

love that idea mrswalker2b!! x i hope you get things sorted out hun xx big hugs! xx

aww weddings can be so stressful...it seems like things will never come together..but they usually do. keep the faith !!! I am sure it will all turn out and you will have a fantastic wedding day xxx I started with 75 guests and it became 52 on the actual day..and I lost one bridesmaid to Australia..but we still had the most amazing day. hugs coming your way xxxx

Aw, hun *huge hugs* I think we've all been there. I spent two months alternately being excited and then crying and wanting to elope.

As for the RSVPs- I'm a hard*** with mine. Mine are due by May 20th- if I haven't heard from my guests by then their invite gets rescinded. I'd agree with the other ladies here- contact everyone who hasn't RSVP'd and ask if they can make it. If they don't say "yes" on the spot, then that's that. They've had plenty of time to tell you and the RSVP deadline had come and gone, so they can't complain if you're harsh with them. It's their own fault.

Facebook is a dangerous place for stirring up emotions. I know how it feels, when you know someone is on line but is not answering events and reminders. Wine is good!

Lol Ricky xx

i spoke to h2b last night and i said that i cant be bothered with anything to do with the wedding at the and would rather just get married by ourselves and then tell everyone. he said it is too late to do that and asked if i was having cold! there is no way i am, i want to marry him more than anything!

i feel better today since i spoke to him but still not bothered about the wedding still. my mum has contacted the remaining people to ask and i spoke to my nan and she is going to speak to her brother as it is all his kids that havnt replied and she isnt happy about it. my nan is going to speak to my uncle (her brother, very confusing family) and say that they have until sunday to reply and if they dont then they wont be able to come!

im not going to contact them until the end of the week and if i dont hear anything then i will be phoning and saying sorry you have had enough time to reply and havnt got space for them now!

I think the reason why one cousin hasnt replied is because he asked if his gf could come and i told him not to the day but she could to the evening and i havnt heard from him since!



h2b said last night why dont we just let put them as a yes and if they show they show and if not they dont and i said because i dont want empty seats at the tables and that will be wasting £30 a head!!

I've felt like this on more than one occasion hun. Even to the point i cancelled everything.

I'm glad you are feeling a little better today though.

As for your cousin babe he should respect the fact that you have said his Gf can come to the evening do but not to the service especially if you don't even know her... i wouldn't worry about that too much, it's his loss if he doesn't come not yours xx

hmm why dont u just hav both of them to nite do? i wud do that x

well unless he rsvp's by sunday then i will tell him he cant come to the day anymore but is welcome to the evening. xx

exactly! i really dont think people realise how important it is to rvsp to a wedding. not as if it is difficut either xx

thats a good idea! i gave them 6/7 weeks! 10 weeks later still waiting for some!

thanks claire. im going to come on here today and tomorrow to entertain myself at work and then im not going to come on till next week sometime. going to have a few days off from the wedding completly and enjoy the weekend! then contact people who havent replied! xx

Mrsbarkertobe......Having a few weeks away from the wedding was the best thing me and Craig did. We got to the point where I think if I asked Craig one more thing that was wedding related he was going to just repeatedly throw blunt objects at me! I have lost count of the amount of times I have forgotten what this wedding was actually about!!

All i will say to is.............How much is it going to affect your perfect day if these lazy cousins end up not coming?? I would be very temted to scratch em off and invite people you have had to bump to the evening instead! I have a whole table full of people I am hoping wont be able to attend so we can invite more friends to the day!!

Well my fingers are crossed for you. xx