My fiances best friend is female and we are wondering if she would be able to be his 'best man', he is one of four brothers and doesnt really want to ask one of those, as he doesnt want the others feeling left out
CommentAuthorJessabell
edited
I say do what you want. I think the best man role is about knowing the groom and what he wants out of the day and helping him to organise everything he needs to organise (plus the stag do of course); and if she is the best person to do all of these things then why not?
Regarding not hurting the brothers' feelings, maybe find small roles for each of them so that they don't feel left out. you could have each of them be responsible for different aspects of the best man role (like introducing the speeches, helping to organise the stag party, or other little aspects of the wedding that will make it personal).
we're trying to find little roles ffor most of our close family, for example: we're planning on getting in the sea (first swim as man and wife, we went surfing the together the day we started dating) after the ceremony itself and and my fiance's brother in law (devoted surfer) is going to preside over a fun little "ceremony" and make a speech in the water.
just little things that make people close to us feel special and useful.
anyway, the point is: do what you like and don't think that you have to adhere strictly to roles and tradition.
x
CommentAuthorjosie
edited
I would personally find that a little bit weird. What would she wear, a suit and tie?
Just social conditioning I guess... if you are fine with it then that's all that matters hun!
xxx
CommentAuthorMrsM2be
edited
My friend had a best woman! She wore a posh frock.
Though to be honest by that time they weren't as close and he speech wasn't great so I'm told missed the wedding due to work.
Do what ever you want it's YOUR wedding
CommentAuthorMel+Chris
edited
Thanks for that, i think she would be wearing a dress similar to my bridesmaids, all your opionions count
I think that you should do whatever makes you happy i think your brothers will respect you for you choice and your reasons and dont forget you'll remember your wedding for rest of your life so its important you do what makes you happy now cos you'll only regret it in long run! look at us
CommentAuthorOuttahere
We're having a best woman as my h2b best friend is a female and he has no siblings. I think people will be shocked to see her but who cares, it's our day and she's who we want x
CommentAuthorMrs_Dillon
our best man was originally a woman only reason we reverted is because said woman stopped talking to h2b and hardly spoke to him unless she wanted something
CommentAuthorTattieSoup
I think a best woman would work really well, all men should have one - judging by Don't Tell the Bride, male best men are completely useless at everything except organising the stag do. I would ask her to wear a dress, different to the bridesmaids but not a suit, unless thats the kind of thing she would normally wear if she was a normal guest.
Alternatively just have all four as "groomsmen" - very American but I like it as you can involve more people in the ceremony. My H2B is having four, two of his friends and my two brothers. One of his friends is more outgoing than the others so we've nominated that one as best man and he is in charge of speeches and stag do, but they are all involved.
CommentAuthorEmsy5000
there are no official rules it should be someone he trusts and will help him
Dyslexic
its spelt wrong
I No! I Now! I Know!!!!!
I am NOW MRS LONSDALE!!
CommentAuthorRachie :D
I think it sounds like a lovely idea xx
9th June 2012 when two worlds collide
The Crazy Cat Lady and the Transformer Man!
CommentAuthorKerrylmac
H2b's cousin had his ex girlfriend as his best man when he got married! Now that's weird!! However I don 't think best men have to be male, just preferably not have slept with the groom! Lol x
CommentAuthorheidianne
i'm going to be a best man when one of my best friends get married coz I'm his best friend. there is nothing wrong with it if you are ok with it
Tick Tock "why is a raven like a writing desk???"
CommentAuthor*Vixie*
i wanted to have a "man of honour" as my best friend is a man but h2b really doesn't like him but at least my friend is coming to the wedding now. spose ive got a happy medium. x
CommentAuthorRachie :D
Kerrylmac sorry i find that so funny :) xx
9th June 2012 when two worlds collide
The Crazy Cat Lady and the Transformer Man!
CommentAuthorMrs Alsbetty
nope dont our originals plan was to have als best friend sarah but her worked cocked up with her holiday so unfortunately we couldn't have her so als dad was in the end but yeah your day your way xx
Enjoying being a wifey!!
Currently baking a small person at last, took a while :)
CommentAuthorMrs (Dove) Pidgeon
My husband is his best mates Chief Bridesmaid. Luckily not wearing a dress...
Now a extremely happy German housewife and now a Mother!!!!
Islay Jean born 24th June in Hannover.
CommentAuthorRachel_Sarah
I was best Man(Woman) at my sisters wedding, i get on really well with her husband and they knew i didnt really want to be a bridesmaid. They both had 1 brother and didnt want to upset either of them so chose me instead.
CommentAuthorHalloween_Bride
h2b is thinking of having his best mate as a best woman as they are like brother & sister xx
Little Miss StressHead
I speak my mind if ya dont like it then tough
Men cant live with them, cant legally kill them
I'm like Marmite you either love me or hate me!!
CommentAuthorlittlemisssunshine
i think having a women as a best man is fine!! its totally up to u as its ur day! and u can have it how ever u want it that the best thing really lol
CommentAuthormrsbeal2be
no i dont think best men have to be male! if shes hes best friend then why not be best female?x
CommentAuthorHeidi
My cousin got married in June and her husband had a best woman x its ur day i say do wot u want x
CommentAuthorSuzie Bear
Yeah there are no rules these days! I'm having a man of honour and 2 male bridesmaids to go with with my three female bridemaids! x
is Mrs Suzie Bear!!!!
Gotta be pink!!! :0)
I think I blinked and missed our wedding!! lol
CommentAuthorHappilymarried Mrs G
I was best "man" for a friend a few years ago, i wore a suit matching his and just added high heels. I organised his stag do, gave a speech everythng and it was all a huge success. On the same note, i have a man in the role of "man of honour" though he has given himself tital bridesmaster lol. It your day and about who you both feel comfortable with and trust to do the job.
CommentAuthorprincess_alicia
i dont think it should be called 'best man' i think it should be 'best friend' :) x x
