It took me 3 months to get hold of the church we want to get married in to book an appointment to get our date (they originally didn't have an answerphone service but must have had one installed as I left a voicemail) it took them almost a week to call back asking what I wanted, (I had already explained in the voicemail we were looking to get married).
Anyway I explained again and asked for a date to meet with the vicar and was told she didn't have the diary on her and she'd call me back! I then had to wait another 4 day's for her to get back to me and offer me a time of 8 in the evening, I explained this was not possible as that is my son's bedtime and it's hard getting someone to watch the children on school night's due to family and friends working, she asked if my paetner could and again I had to decline as he is on late's the day she chose, I asked if it was possible to have an appointment for around 4 o clock, she said that was fine but me and partner both had to be their!
forgive me if i'm being silly but I don't understand why he had to be their for an afternoon appointment but not an evening one?
yet again I have to call her back as my partner get's his rota's monthly so I don't know whatday's off he has in September and now have to call back once I have them!
is it worth sticking with the church after all this hassle? as am really considering going to our original plan getting married in the park xx

I don't mind waiting a few days or even a couple of weeks but the first time was 3 months!, I did think about going in on a sunday but my children have short attention span's and get restless quickly and I don't want to upset people that go all the time x

And people don't get upset... they normally run a couple of masses, one for people with children and one for less children... people expect you to bring kids to church... they expect kids to be brought up with the church in their lives... They normally even run a children's liturgy.

I can understand your frustration but I think you do need to make an effort to actually go to church if you intend to marry there. People are used to visitors turning up for services and children are par for the course and actually, the majority of congregations will welcome children. Fresh blood etc. Also, it will get the children used to a church environment for when you actually get married. Unfortunately my fiance and I can't get married in our church which upsets us both greatly still even though we have both been going since birth yet you are allowed to go. Sometimes it doesn't seem fair to us when other people can get married in the church but don't go to worship on a regular basis yet us who would give anything to marry there can't! Try and get to services, even if it's just once a month, you never know, your children might actually enjoy it! Also, you don't want to get to the wedding and not have a clue as to what is included in the service or what any of it means. Btw, some vicars can be a nightmare to get hold of however the best idea really would be to get to a service your vicar is taking (check beforehand as they go around the parish taking services at different churches so may not necessarily be at your church the week you go) and go along.. Even if it's just you to start with and your fiance stays at home and babysits. At the end of the day, your fiance should be there as the vicar will want to meet you both alot before the wedding. I hope you get hold of the vicar soon and get it sorted, it is so frustrating when you're so excited! Also, the vicar will also expect your children to be brought up in the faith/church as you are marrying there. xx

When I spoke with the clergy in the church that we will be married in I told him that I would do whatever he requested. I'm entering their house of God, which is an honour and they're agreeing to marrying me which is also an honour. I suppose it's personal preference, some people prefer to marry away from the church. But I think if you choose to marry in a church you accept everything that comes with it. They are so busy that at times their communication just can't be maintained easily. X

The church we are getting married hold information evenings, where you go along and can chat to the vicar and sort paperwork, money etc. it's once a week for an hour, you don't need to make an appointment, just pop in. Maybe your church might do something like this? x

I used to take my daughter to church on a Wednesday morning (before she started school) as it wasn't as busy and we both really enjoyed it, the church we are looking at is a different one and tbh didn't think of asking if they did a service in the week which is silly really!, thank you for all the advice, will look to see if they do a service during the week, I would've changed his bedtime but as it's a school night I really don't want to, as I know the meetings can take a while, thank you again all xx