Im callin of the wedding as we cant afford it and I dont want to start married life in debt!! I hate how im feeling right now everything just feels like its going wrong. Things seem to be going from bad to worse can bearly afford to live let alone get married. Its hard bring up a 3 year old one your own most of the time and pay the rent and by all the dinners. Sorry ladies just need a rant! xx
CommentAuthorShirleygirly
Rant away. First off do you have to call the whole thing off or can you postpone for a year or two. There are some brilliant threads on here that give money saving ideas and the bay of e seems to offer some bargains. I've paid deposits for all the big things and calculated how much we need to pay 6 weeks before. All the little bitty bits I've been buying as I go along with money I have spare each month. It's meant I have to do without things but I'm surprised at how much I've accumulated. My parents have said they'll pay for the venue but my dad has had some health problems and may have to retire so I'd rather they used their savings for themselves. I was like you when I thought about paying for everything myself but h2b said we don't need to have 100 guests we could make it more intimate and we can forget about the band, just have a dj. When I look at it that way there are lots of things that aren't turkey necessary and we can do without.
I hope you can sort something Hun, talk it through with h2b.x
I can't wait until 29/06/2013
The day I marry the man of my dreams!
CommentAuthorsam
Im not sure im going to talk to dan when he gets in but we have booked the church but i seem to be doin everything alone and i can take anymore xx
CommentAuthorInDreamland
Oh no hun! Hope you don't have to completely cancel and can just postpone for a year or two which will allow you to save up more and also maybe pay for things slowly.
Shirleygirly is right, there are some really inspiring threads on here from brides who are doing alot of DIY and have money saving tips which is great for any size budget.
I hope you can sort something out xx
Married the love of my life on Saturday 11th May 2013 xxx
Had our dream perfect honeymoon in Hawaii!
CommentAuthorsam
i made my invites thinking it would save money but ended up costing more, partner doesnt seemto understand that i hate the way im left alone planning xx
i think you really need to sit down and discuss this both of you. i joined this site roughly the same time you have left and i felt like you i was planning everything as i was worried i wouldnt get this and that that i wanted. when i asked him he said that it was over a year away and really he didnt feel he had much to do as it was so long to go. so dont feel the need. ive just asked h2b to sum this up and he said what i thought. just do wee bits at a time, make lists etc but dont cancel the wedding etc because of that reason alone.
plus remember hes a guy he doesnt think about a dream wedding (sorry all guys on here!!!)
All the ways of my life id rather be with you.
Theres no way without you.
10.11.12
CommentAuthorRaggedyAnne
I have done loads of DIY and saved a LOT of money. Basically I work it out that the budget we had, I was able to in half by DIY-ing it. it CAN be done. First thing we did was only have our nearest and dearest on the guest list.
I can resist anything but temptation
CommentAuthorSelinaK
Don't do anything rash hon, talk to the OH, tell him how you are feeling and ask him for help. Sometimes they can't read minds so you have to be EXTREMELY clear with them!! He might surprise you and be really supportive, but you won't know if you don't speak to him!! At the end of the day, you have to decide what is more important to you, we only get one life so make it count!!! xx
CommentAuthorShirleygirly
Men really don't get why we plan so far in advance. I had 22 months when I started planning and h2b used to yawn at my suggestion be ause we had ages to go. He then started to moan about the fact he didn't get a say in my decisions. I had a meltdown with his lack of concern and once I showed him the list of things I had to do he realised how much I had on my plate. He's helped out more but now he's in Afghanistan I still get a bit panicky about how much there is to do. I still haven't tried on a single dress and I don't know how I'm going to get my widespread bms together. It is panicky and you want to tear your hair out but remember you've got lots of women in the same boat here to help you in whatever way we can. Even if you just need a rant. x
I can't wait until 29/06/2013
The day I marry the man of my dreams!
CommentAuthorsam
thankyou everyone i spoke o dan last night and he said he was goin to talk to his family when hes home next but i cant see it heppening at the moment because as soon as he gets in he has dinner then just lays on the sofa and does nothing!! xx
CommentAuthorAtaraxia
The problem is that for most men, the wedding doesn't occur to them until about the three months before. As brides to bel we start planning the moment that ring goes on our hand and we say yes but for them a year or more is something that isn't even on the radar.
I spent the first year or so planning almost entirely by myself with some help from bridesmaids etc, and at first it ALWAYS ends up that with the overwhelming load of information from bride magazines and websites on stuff you end up thinking you need you end up over complicating it. At one point I was convinced my wedding would suck completely if I didn't have all these silly things I've never seen before... Bring it back down to what you both want and build from there.
We were supposed to married a year ago tomorrow but postponed because we realised we needed more time to save and the wedding we were planning wasn't the wedding we actually wanted. We started from scratch and it's been worth it - there were times when I felt like I was completely on my own and we had arguments but eventually he did get excited and now we're five days away and our wedding is set. Don't lose heart. Sit down together, tell him that you need him to tell you what kind of things he couldn't live without on the day and you do the same, make a list and a reasonable budget and start there. We realised we didn't want a huge formal affair with everyone we ever knew in attendance, so we're having an intimate wedding with just 40 guests, just having a little sit down meal and some music and drinks after. All in all we've spent less than £2k. You'll find as you go some things may go slightly over but with some wonderful help from friends family and the lovely ladies on here, I have managed to find some absolute steals so i think you'll find some bargains too. Once all the important things are paid off, if there's any extra cash you can start on the little extras you'd like to have.
it's stressful but it's so worth it, i can honestly say I've never felt more excited, or close to my h2b.
Got married 27th June and blessed on July 5th 2012
Finally Mrs M :3
Love, love... Here we are.
CommentAuthorHa_x3
Im very sorry to hear this hun, how about postpoing it two years? or is that still a bit unrealistic? xx
Mrs Lunn
08/05/12 was the best day of my life
& I love my husband with all my heart xxxx
