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    • DebbieM386
      CommentAuthorDebbieM386
      Getting married in 3 months
      Posted: May 9th 2020
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      edited
     
    Hi everyone,

    First time poster so please bear with me. I really need some advice.

    I’m due to get married in September in Poland (COVID-19 permitting) and bought my bridesmaid dresses a few months back. My bridesmaids have been great but I have one issue now. At the time, one of my BM asked if she should order a dress in a smaller size because she was planning on losing weight. I said no and asked her to get it in her current size. That was all fine. I paid for the dresses (around £800) and said at the time that any alterations would need to be covered by them. No one said anything so assumed that was fine.
    Fast forward a few months, coronavirus has hit and we ended up chatting the other day about the wedding at which she said categorically that her dress won’t fit as she’s put on quite a bit of weight. Understandable in the current circumstances so I said not to worry about it and she can always get it altered. She was quite standoffish about it, almost as if she didn’t want to pay for it although that’s what we’d all agreed. She can be quite narcissistic and argues that her problems are worse than everyone else’s. She split from her husband a year and a half ago and I know she’s struggling financially as she has 2 kids. But this was also the case when I asked her to be BM (I did tell her not to feel obligated if it would be too difficult but she insisted it would be fine)
    I get things are difficult but I can’t afford to pay for her alterations as I hadn’t budgeted for it, and I don’t think it’s fair to the other BMs if I pay for her alterations and not theirs.
    She has some serious mental health issues so I’m so worried about broaching the subject again. At the minute, I’m holding off saying anything because I don’t know for def if our wedding will be going ahead (May need to postpone) so I’m thinking she may have an extra few months to deal with the extra weight. But if I do need to discuss it again, I’m really stuck with what to do!

    Apologies for the v. Long post. Thank you!
 
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