Some of my so-called friends are making me feel like im being really stingy with my wedding. We are on a budget, like most people and so I am making as much as possible or getting things as nearly new or in the sale.... You know where i'm coming from. these people have being saying things like "why are you doing that" or "is that all your doing" and things like that.
my OH and I are not really fancy people, and things we are doing are basic, but effective and i love them.
I'm sorry, I just needed to get it off my chest
CommentAuthorkerriface
Ignore them. Or say if they don't like it they don't have to come. They'll soon change their tune if they think they're missing out on free food, people usually do!xx
CommentAuthorsamwiseheart
if they are true friends they should be surportive of you and the mrs wishes hun, me and my mr have cut alsorts out of our wedding, only im having flowers none of the others, were not really having table pieces, so dont feel cheap hunny, its your day and your making the best out of the day with what you have. does all the aftermath count? as soon as your husband and wife will you really be worried about the party and will others? i dont think so, im sure you will have a good day, xx
CommentAuthorlh2404
It's your day, you do it your way.
Me and my h2b are not having a big fancy wedding either. Very small ceremony (like 20 guests small), followed by a buffet and reception in a masonic lodge. My brother is making my wedding cake, my bil is in a band so is doing that for us for free, I got my shoes on ebay (second hand but practically new), my dress was half price because I bought the one in stock instead of ordering new one in - oh and I'm doing my own make up.
Weddings can be as expensive or as cheap as you want them to be. We are cutting loads of corners to save money. it's the marriage itself that's important - not how the day is dressed up.
CommentAuthorkatie1991
aww hun bless ya i dont think u are! I look for things in sales and if people dont like it they aint got to come at the end of the day if she was any mate she would be behind you helping you look for things. xxx
Oh ignore them. It's your wedding you do what you want, not them. Defo know how you feel though xxx
CommentAuthor~feebee~
It's a pain when people stick their oar in, I agree with kerriface lol x
I think the whole wedding thing has got out of hand these days, you're expected to do and have this that and the other. My mum's first wedding dress was borrowed (just after the war) and her second was just one of her best dresses, you know, that's how people were if they were skint and no fancy honeymoons or posh cars etc....
It's nice to be able to have the best of course but if money was no object where would we stop? I would certainly be doing it a lot different! A helicopter instead of a car for one thing *sigh* ;0)
Finally Mrs Grove :)
CommentAuthorx Disney Princess x
A wedding is not supposed to be about how much you spend on it. My friend got married in a registry office then hired a bar which didn't cost much but it was lovely and they are really happy together.
Your so called friends are jealous don't listen to their negativity and just tell them so long as you and h2b are happy then you don't need to spend loads of money on a wedding x
CommentAuthorLegoWife
Nothing wrong with being cheap anyway in my opinion. Doesn't mean your wedding is going to be any less meaningful or not look fabulous regardless! Just cause it's a wedding doesn't mean you have to spend ridiculous amounts of money on it. It's not about "being royalty for a day." Like so many people would have us think. It's a celebration of love, and no matter how much you spend, it could never be cheap!
~Wedding made of Lego~
*Married 30/03/13*
CommentAuthorbabybex
Ur wedding is ur wedding, whether you do it for £500 or £500,000 no matter who you have there people will always find little niggly things (I'm sure thats jealousy) if you didn't tell them how much u was spending would they still judge? I think no because their minds won't know that x y z only cost u £30 and not £300. Put a price tag on a piece of tat for mega bucks and someone will buy it. Don't worry about what other people are saying, ur day is ur day. U make it as special as u want with as little or as much money as u want.
CommentAuthorsussie
I know its stupid and oyur right, we are doing what we want, i was just so proud of what i had done and now Im not, I'm sure aas time goes by I will be happy with it again, as it is what i want
CommentAuthorLegoWife
Just tell them if they think you need more expensive stuff you're happy for them to pay for it! lol :)
~Wedding made of Lego~
*Married 30/03/13*
CommentAuthorloustew2012
real friends wouldnt so that they would be supportive.
i havent told any of mine anything as they are not involved and will be guests
end of the day its your wedding and if u and h2b is happy then forget about them!!!
xxx
All the ways of my life id rather be with you.
Theres no way without you.
10.11.12
CommentAuthorxnikki86x
Ignore them hun, I'm making my own invitations and as my MOH said its more heartfelt that way and I totally agree! Do it your way and nobody else's x
CommentAuthorTsukijin
If they want anything more tell them you would be more than willing to accept contributions towards it! Money doesn't come easily why don't people get that? I've been accused of being cheap too.
eru, shiteiru ka? shinigami wa ringo shika tabenai?
^_^
CommentAuthorFutureMrsPite
dont listen! they obviously have ideas of what they think should be done at weddings etc, just wait til they plan one then they wont speak b4 thinking! its not easy especially if ur on a budget so do what u want and what makes u happy, say u dont feel right spending so much money on one day when theres children in africa starving, that will shut them up! lol its the time and effort ur putting into finding all these things that will show in the end and they will be eating their words come the day x
As the beatles say, Love Is All You Need x
CommentAuthor♥Future Mrs Midgley♥
Doing things on a smaller budget is better than starting your married life in debt together. It also encourages you to be more imaginative; which in turn makes the day more personal to you. xxx
CommentAuthorA.Bird2b
I bet your day will still look fabulous and you will love it, ignore the people who complain, as my father used to say "you don't make your fortune by spending all your money", much better to spend a little than spend to much and end up in debt like Future Mrs Midgley says.
Have fun finding all those bargains you love, making things yourself and when on the day they're oooh-ing and aah-ing over how beautiful it all is you can hold your head that little bit higher knowing you were right
CommentAuthorMrsMcleish2B
I'm having the same too. I have 1 bridesmaid (My Sister) and 1 Flower girl (my Neice) which I thought would be perfect BUT I'm just being treated like a cash cow by my sister. She seriously expected me to buy her a handmade bridesmaid dress that she could design herself priced at £250 +++ Now I feel totally rubbish because I simply dont want to pay that much for 1 dress that she will wear once. That's only the half of it but don't want to bore you with my spoilt sister stories lol Your not alone though hun I'm getting it from all angles too xxxxx
Wedding Day - 16th June 2012
CommentAuthorFutureMrsClarke
Didnt you know that everyone else gets to choose what happens on your wedding??
Oh wait, no they dont! Tel them to keep it buttoned! Blooming nose aches!
CommentAuthorlala "mod" bunni
just remember that by making things your self you are making your wedding unique
Ignore them! I made my own save the date cards and will be making invitations etc too. Its just about money it makes it more personal. I love it because its exactly what I want.
xx
Happily in love and can't wait to be married! xx
CommentAuthorlala "mod" bunni
i have made .....
my inviations place cards confetti cones seating plan bouquets
I too am on a budget, and in all honestly, your friends sound a lot like my family.
I bought my dress ridiculously cheap, I practically stole my bridesmaids dresses (£15 for two) and when I showed my mum she couldn't even try to be nice about it! She told me the BM dresses were horrible, and when my sis asked what they were like my mum said "be glad you're not going to be wearing one".
What you should probably know is this, my family are snobs! Proper snobs! Nothing is ever good enough, and nothing ever will be!
When I showed my future SIL the BM dresses she almost cried! I've discussed everything to do with the wedding with her, so she knows what I'm going for. She couldn't believe how much the dresses cost me, and they're the perfect colour too... to me, they're a blank canvas that I can add my own twist to!
The only thing mymum approved of was the invitation sample... but when I told her I would be making them myself she sighed!
Just remember that this is your wedding, not theirs! If you want to do something, do it!
CommentAuthorLolaMay0412
I am also on a budget, and because we have had to do our holiday sheets at work, word has gotten around that my wedding is in May and everyone wants to know the details. And they keep telling me 'I can't believe you aren't having a big evening do' and 'aren't you having a hen party then?'. I work in a predominantly male industry, so there is only one reason they are interested in a hen party!! All they want is an excuse to get completely trollied and make fools of themselves. I'd love to invite people from work but just our depot has nearly 100 staff!
CommentAuthorlinzi
I have made pretty much everything myself. OOS, post box, table plan, invites etc etc. Also got the flower girl dresses second hand from ebay as well as my tiara. My dress was half price in the sale. And I am also being made to feel cheap, even though the wedding budget is currently coming in at about £12k.
i got sneered at for not putting a stamped addressed RSVP card in with invites from SIL2B and her girlfriend, others have "gasped" when I have said I made the invites myself. Others have happily told me they are getting theirs professionally printed to their own design with a professional stationary company for hundreds of £'s. But does it mean their wedding is gonna be better than mine? does it fook.
i dont care. We couldnt afford to have everything made for us, and making everything really makes me feel like this wedding is alive, and mine. if you get what i mean. A lot of hard work and love has gone into it, and I am sure that is gonna shine through on the day. i would rather that than just a show of how much money we have thrown at it with professionally made things everywhere
I don’t repeat gossip so listen very carefully!!
Started Slimming World - 23/03/2011 - 2 Stone to lose!
Total Loss = 1 stone 7 lbs.
As at 23/11 - 3 days before the wedding.
CommentAuthoremmaaa
Hollhollholly, I adore that sentiment, it says exactly how I feel a lot more succinctly than I could put it, and with a lot less ranting! And it's exactly what you should tell your snobbish friends. I hate how the wedding industry has hijacked the most important day of people's lives to make a fortune from them. If you want to spend lots of money on it, that's fine, but it doesn't make one that hasn't cost as much any less valid or worthy!
CommentAuthornatalie2614
I think everyone is on a budget nowadays because no one has an infinite pot of money to spend on a wedding. I came up with a budget and H2B agreed it and we are sticking to that. I'd love to have a band, table centres that are taller than me and a designer dress but that's me being unrealistic. I'm also making savings by making my own stationary and I think it adds a lovely personal touch. He thinks I'm doing them on my own....nope! H2B will be getting roped in!
Married my best friend 05.04.2013
CommentAuthormarie08
some great advice given to you hun and agree friends should be supportive and help you when they can.if you dont tell them where you saved or how they wont know and wont judge you on it.what matters is your day and how you feel.everyone likes a good bargin and if say otherwise they are fibbing.also you doing bits your self is your own touches and be proud of em.xx
CommentAuthorEcoFreak
People can spend hundreds of thousands on a wedding and it still look cr*p! It's your wedding, do it how you want it. If you listened to these people you'd end up without your dream wedding and in a lot of debt... lose-lose situation really! Xx
CommentAuthorsussie
thanks guys i feel a lot better about it now. I have now designed and started making my invitations, they are cross stitch cards with a printed insert, im cheating with place names and favours, i am doing stitching keyrings with indivisual names which means i dont have to worry about both. i'm making all the table centre pieces myself and very tempted to attempt the flowers, because if i use artifical ones then i can take my time.
CommentAuthor♥Future Mrs Midgley♥
Sounds like you have it sorted now babe. x
CommentAuthorBridezilla
Isn't it amazing how so many people seem to have an opinion about YOUR (anybody's) wedding? You'd think sometimes that they'd been planning how it should be before you (anybody) even got engaged.
CommentAuthorMrsCaitiClarke
What bugs me the most is the people have all these ideas and have the cheek to tell you how to plan your wedding, what to do, what to have, how much to spend...and it's OUR money paying for them to be there in the first place!!! Wedding guests aren't asked to part with cash to attend this thing - we're paying for the privelige of them showing up and then being unhappy! If you don't like it you can jog on - I got fed up with some so called 'friends' who seemed more interested in if there would be a free bar than the fact that H2b and I are getting married so I told them to get lost. Saved myself 6 wedding breakfasts to pay for - H2B and I aren't saving up (and we are also working to a v.modest budget and I'm making everything I can myself as I love to do it) in order to please people who are just fake friends. Rant over!
I can't wait to marry the love of my life - 28/04/2012
OCD Bride - it's all in the details!
CommentAuthorjdnems
if they cant accept the way you want your wedding to be on a certain budget then i wouldnt really say that they are really good friends i know what it is like to try keep it at a reasonable budget, I guess i am lucky that her stepdad is paying my other halfs dress and her dad is going to put towards my sister in laws outfits and her family that has really helped us out
CommentAuthorsussie
i just dont wanna go to crazy. i might put pictures up of what i have done, to see what people think as im still not really sure,
CommentAuthorEcoFreak
Sure thing hun, I'm sure they look great :)
I'm also gonna get silk flowers (just seen some perfect ones for £1 each!) and make my bouquet & buttonholes myself Xx
CommentAuthorsussie
i really want to do that, but i have never tried flower arranging, so a bit scared really. but i suppose i could try....
