I was talking to a very posh aunt of mine earlier today, she lives in Milton Keynes and said that the only reason she would come to the wedding is if we paid for 2 nights in a hotel!!!! when i asked her why 2 she said, the night before and the night after so they are not rushing to get here and back.
I asked her why she couldnt pay for the room herself seeing as she isnt exactly short of cash and she said because its my wedding i should pay for all guest accomadation? is that right ettiquette? Well even if it is i told her that there is no way we can afford a hotel room but she is welcome to our flat because we wont be using it for those nights, then she said she doesnt want to stay in a dingy little flat, so i told her to shove the invite somewhere unmensionable and hung up.
Do you think i was being unnreasonable? i did offer her my home for goodness sake, ok rant over lol xxxx

its probably traditional for millionaires to pay for accomodation for all their guests lol. i would never expect anyone to pay for my hotel! especially when its for 2 nights not 1! i'm glad you told her to shove it :) x

I think its your aunt that is being unreasonable not you. Also I would be really insulted if someone called my home a dingy little flat! xxx

honestly family are a nightmare sometimes ! she is being very unreasonable and u did the right thing, she insulted u return which wasnt nice at all, well done on telling her where to go xx

No your not being unreasonable!!
If she wants to stay in a hotel fair enough but she can pay for it. At the end of the day your paying for your whole wedding day!!

I would have hung up on her aswell LoL!! xx

I agree with everyone above.. You're aunt is the one being unreasonable.. I'd just wait and see though hun, if she's really bothered about coming and she can afford the hotel, she'll pay.
And oh my gosh, i'd be so offended if someone said my home was a "dingy little flat" I mean it's your home!! ooh, you'll probably have a better day if she doesn't show anyway (no disrespect meant there) x

Send her an invite to the wrong place.....

:)

I wouldn't do it really...not unless someone had REALLY pissed me off!!! ;)

I think it's pretty clear that she's the only being totally unreasonable. Everyone I know who has travelled to a wedding has paid for their own room, it's pretty fundamental stuff. Maybe if there was someone there she might be putting it on, but would you want someone that fake to your wedding anyway, even if it is your aunt?
I think you were totally within your right to hang up, 'specially if she called your home a 'dingy little flat'!! xxx

she is being horrid, ignore her, we have people staying in our house, or with other family members, we negotiated a special rate at the hotel for everyone else.
I might pay for my Mum a room so she can get merry instead of worrying about the 25 mile drive home but everyone else has been left to make their own arrangements.

we are paying the deposits for the rooms, just to secure them all. then when the guest check out they have to pay their bill in full and the money that we paid for the deposits comes of the final venue bill. so no u are not out of order i wont pay for our guests rooms just dont have the money if they want to stay they pay xx

no i wouldn't call that unreasonable at all hun.. i call that damn right and i would of done the same!!! xxx

omg not unreasonable at all hun, i wouldnt pay for my guests its up to them if they want to share our specail day and to let someone use your home is amazing she should be grateful and honoured that you would do this for her x

...jeeeeeeeeeeez ALL my guests are travelling a minimum of 6 hours some 10/12 to our wedding and staying a minimum of 2 nights...not ONE guest has complained.

That is why we will be treating them as much as we are able to when they are with us!

PLEASE NOTE: I would like to say that we spoke to our guests re the venue/distance/travelling/costs BEFORE the date was set etc...there WHERE worries but ALL sortable!

EVERY guests has sorted accomodation to suit their budgets etc...there is plenty of time at Fiddles wedding as mine for folk to save...!

OMG the cheek of some people!!!!!!!!!!!!! that is certainly not the normal thing to do!

i can't believe some of the things people expect from you when your already spending a fortune on your wedding!

good for you for sticking to your guns though.
xx

My future husbands family and best man are coming from Norway. They are all paying for their own air fares and accommodation we are just providing coach transport to & from airport and church and venue etc. We are having our service via skype for those who can't make it or can't afford it. I think it was lovely that you offered her your home and she should be aware that weddings are expensive enough and everyone is struggling in the present climate. It does leave you a bit deflated though and upset. If you want to clear the air just send a note explaining you dont have the funds and have been hurt by her attitude then it is up to her and you can get on with enjoying your special day.

Im sorry ive got to laugh.....what a cheeky mare. All our guests are paying for their own accomadation. Good on you girl for telling her where to shove it :-)

Pffft....some people ey?! They do my head in! No i dont think your being unreasonable at all! You stick to your guns :) x

Defo not being unreasonable, thats so rude, I would have done the same. Its your day and guest should feel privilaged that you are inviting them to join you in your celebration, therefore they should be more then happy to pay for hotels for themselves, so that they can be there. x

Gotta say in all my 40 years I have NEVER had my accomodation paid for at a Wedding...I must complain! lol

How rude of her to be that way. Its your wedding. Because we are marrying in a hotel we have warned everyone that if they want to stay I will give them a price and they will have to pay for their own accommodation. We can't afford to pay for everyone as we already have with the wedding celebrations anyway. Take that approach lol

I wouldn't even bother on sending her an invite as its so rude. No one pays for hotel rooms unless they are really rich. I'm including a card with a couple local hotels and the price. My aunt assumed she would be staying at my parents and was miffed when my mum said no. If she don't want to pay for a hotel for 1 or 2 nights I think it shows they don't really care about you so don't bother with them!! x

Personally I think you totally did the right thing how dare she for one try and put a damper on your offer and two inslut your home, and just because shes family doesnt give her the right to be a chuffing diva ( thats your job ;) ) lol xxxx