My H2B's sister is a BM. Now she has been miss pain in the backside since day 1. My wedding is July 21st so a few months yet. Anyway she wasnt happy with dress 1, i tried to change it but it suited other two girls so majority had to rule as you cannot please everyone. Her mum called my h2b last night to get him to ask me if i had got a new dress. I txt his sister to say, no am going with original as cannot afford to etc. I had no reply. Two mins later her mum calls (sarah is 25 and cannot call me herself??) Mum says " i heard you are going with original dress, Sarah must have it this week as need to make changes and Sarah hasnt got long till the day. " i said " well its not till july and my dress isnt ready yet" to which she replied " right but sarah must have it this week, its a must, she needs to have it ready for the day as time is going quickly"
Erm, who's day is it? plus i do not even know what "changes" to the dress she is doing
Am i wrong to be mad??
CommentAuthorJoanna
I don't blame you for being mad. I think it's very strange that her mum rung you instead of ringing herself! You should ask her what changes she wants to make xx
The greatest thing you'll ever learn
is just to love and be loved in return
CommentAuthorHayleyDnowM
certainly not, i cannot believe they are pressuring you in the run up to the wedding, she should accept that it's your day and your choice! you should ask her what she is going to be changing on the dress too as they should really be asking you if it would be ok to do so in the 1st palce! i think you should be the bigger person and ring Sarah and talk to her yourself rather than through the mil2b! If it comes down to it and she's still not happy then tell her she can either go with what you say or don't bother being a bm, can't believe how awkward and selfish people can be! Hope you get it sorted! xx
CommentAuthormadhen
You are definitely not wrong to be mad!! What are they on? It's hardly more important for the BMs dress to be there than the bride's, for goodness sake! I would find out what these changes are. If she hasn't the decency to go with your plans for your own wedding then she shouldn't be BM, end of story. Good luck, not a nice situation :(
CommentAuthorKaya
Oh dear!!!! Haha. Sarah and her mum sound like right ones!!! haha
I would definitely consider dumping her as a bridesmaid if she can't speak to you herself (she is 25 years old?!) and being so awkward about it all. They really need to be consulting with you about any changes before going ahead instead of demanding to take the dress away and do god knows what with it! It really is annoying when family think they have a right to be your bridesmaid regardless of your actual relationship. x
CommentAuthorFuture mrs mac
I think you need to find out what changes she wants - if she big chected/big built?Maybe she wants only slight changes so she doesn't feel self consious in the dress? Could you get your h2b to call her direct and find out what exactly the problem is?x
CommentAuthorFuture Mrs Doublé
I would talk to OH if I were you as his mum and sister are being proper pains, you should not give the dress to her until the day before the wedding. I am keeping everything here at home and my adults bm are staying with me and in morning all flower girls will join us and we'll all get ready here at my place. It is your wedding, she should be honoured that you have chosen her as a bridesmaid, and try to make the day easy for you and accept your choices, especially if YOU paid for it.
Soon to be Mrs Gary Doublé
Everything is now booked
Getting really stressed and excited now
CommentAuthorbecky -mrs firth
u need to ask wat changes she wants to do, tell her bar makin it fit no changes r allowed
Engaged 27th November 2010
Hen Do Newcastle 2nd June 2012
Marrying the man of my dreams 11th August 2012!
Honeymoon To Jamaica 14th October 2012
CommentAuthorhjessie
Hi, thakns for replies :) dresses will need to be taken in slightly anyway for all of them which they all knew. Its a funny sizing dress but we all agreed. I know she is worried about her big bust but i still do not know exactly what changes will be. Even if i did, i feel that demanding dress NOW as she hasnt got long till day is very much making it about her. My dress isnt ready yet. I was gonna get measurments etc done a month before as people bodys may differ slightly
CommentAuthorkrissy905
mmmmmmmmmm changes to the dress i would be keep hold of it till the last minute the only alterations it should need is taking in or taking up and thats not something that needs to be done till a month or so before the wedding just in case of weight gain or loss.
is she forget that shes just a bm and not actually the bride lol
CommentAuthorhjessie
Whats worse is that from day one my mum and sister are umming and ahhing about coming at all as i invited dad. First they flat out refused to come and said i was selfish having it in July as too expensive for them to come over (they live in France). Also my dad said he would put 2k towards it but now (being 4 months away ) saying he cannot afford it, so we may have to get a loan. Sarah and her mum know all this and how its hurting me so why add pressure?
CommentAuthorkrissy905
because unfortunately some people feel any situation is about them and whats in it for them they sound like right selfish so and so x
CommentAuthorhjessie
Its odd as i would never dream of doing any of that. Heck if i was told to wear a bin bag, i wear a bin bag. Not my day or my say so, i mean i would never humiliate a bridesmaid but there are limits.
