Wedding Forum - A bit upset - not sure what to do...

So me and the OH went to visit venues for the first time today - 3 venues to be exact.

I really liked the first one but it was more so for the backdrop, its by a lake with lovely scenery - however given our large guest list i was concerned that the hall would be too small. - the hall sit 120 and 150 standing - looking at it i just dont think that it would be big enough..this is just the reception venue..

second venue was the venue i had my heart set on from when i saw it on the website - i had an app booked at 2.. however i was left waiting for 40 minutes by the event manager, was then told i can be shown the venue by the security guard but i had to be quick as someone had an app at 3 with the same event manager, so i got to see her briefly but she diddnt have anything much to say which kind of put me off.. however the venue was still wonderful, its just the reception venue...

the third venue was very similar to the second however the people were much more accomodating and had two potential rooms - and i liked both of them...

However the OH decided that he liked the first one straight away before even looking at the other venues and barely gave the others a chance, he just did not appear interested after the first venue, its like he had made up his mind.

This really frustrated me and im thinking it was mainly because it was a really reasonable price and thats all he was talking about... and he got on my nerves all afternoon..

iv tried to explain that its going to be too small but he is not having it and i dont wish to cut down my guests any further...

How do you suggest i work this out with him without choking him... (lol)

Maybe go back to the others with more time, ask them to revisit but ensure the events manager has plenty of time to spend with you showing you around and discussing things. Maybe he will then change his mind.

Maybe you can ask him if he is willing to cut down his guests any further. If he can see that that is a condition of the first one he might be more open minded. Sometimes people can decide they like the first one they see and find excuses with the other ones for why they're not as good. I would certainly not let it drop, keep pointing out why you like the other ones better.

It needs to be a joint decision. I don't think you should choose a venue he doesn't like. I think you may have to cut guests as the wedding is about the two of you getting married, not always about having hundreds of ppl there x

Id go to the third venue again, to me this sounds like the one. get him when hes in a good mood. some men ive found approach weddings like they do clothes shoppin. IN, LOOK, BUY, OUT, HOME. they dont shop around like we do lol

ideally you dont want to cut guests im sure, but if it needs to be done i found there is a handy pic floatin round the net on how to cull guests - if uve not seen them for a yr or you wouldnt miss them at the wedding then cut them.

explain your worries to him and that its stressing you. compromise.

good luck.xx

To be fair my partner and I saw a few venues, he said he liked them but the one he preferred was the cheapest one. I think it must be a natural thing for a man to do. However, in saying that, he could just really like this venue, maybe he sees it as intimate and that your guests would have to mingle as they would be so close knit to each other. Maybe try a completely new venue and see if yous can come to an agreement on a completely different venue. Rather than one of you having to chose a venue you're not happy with. We went for the cheaper venue, but my H2B gave me other reasons, other than price: It was central to all our guests, it was stunning, the staff we're friendly, it was kid friendly (big to us with 2 young boys) and it meant I could spend more on other aspects lol

Haha, Flossie. My man has expensive taste with almost anything but when it's his money he's spending he rains it in a little :~)

My husband knew which venue he wanted before we got engaged. I had one or two ideas, although a couple of them while phenomenal were through the roof on cost. However he had a good reason for choosing the hotel that we used, as his parents and sister stay whenever they visit and his sister is severely disabled. That particular hotel had always been great about accommodating her, including adapting the bed, so having the reception there meant that we knew Sarah could be looked after, and could be taken up to her room during the meal (she doesn't eat and gets fed up being around people who are eating). When he explained his reasoning I was quite happy to go with it.

i think he is just trying to be cheap... loool,,,

but im going to look at some other venues when i get back from my holiday.... and hoepfully we can both agree on something... if anything i think we will have to cut down some guests if we go with the first one..

buut i think were at the bare minimum already as we have big families.. but we will see