So basically my problem is that when me and my partner announced our engagement all of our siblings an friends started whining and asking to be involved, to make things easier I just said yes and now we have 6 bridesmaids and 6 groomsmen and its costing a ridiculous amount. It's at least £50 per bridesmaid and £100 per groomsmen so its going to come to at least £900 and our budget is only £6000. Basically i need to bump some of them off cause we can't afford it and none of them are willing to pay for their own dresses/ suits. HELP!
Love: A wildly misunderstood, although highly desirable,
malfunction of the heart.
37 Pounds down, 22 pounds to go! I will be a skinny bride!
28th March 2014 will be the day I marry my best friend.
CommentAuthorPrincess2be
if they are not willing to pay hun then your just going to have to be ruthlesss. Explain that you are on a tight budget and after looking into prices it is just not feesable to be able to have them all as much as you would like it. If they love you then they will understand. There are other ways they could b involved like helping making favours or stationary. etc x
CommentAuthorInDreamland
Princess2be is right, couldn't say it better myself x
Married the love of my life on Saturday 11th May 2013 xxx
Had our dream perfect honeymoon in Hawaii!
CommentAuthorLoz K
Siblings should be more understanding and step aside to let other friends take those sorts of roles, they shouldn't really be joining in with the whining!
I'm going to have a similar problem when I announce my plans to friends and family - we're going abroad and taking literally parents and bridesmaids and groomsmen. I have siblings that won't fall into those categories so hopefully they'll be understanding!
CommentAuthorShelleyM46
u need 2 expain like the other posts hav said if there not willing 2 pay towards it.it is expensive int it iv just started lookin in 2 prices of suit hire.my budget was 3000 think its gunna b a lot more by the time iv finished lol x
cant wait to marry the love of my life
my soul mate and my best friend
They should pay to participate it's as simple as that. They asked to participate after all. You've kept the prices low, many of those "bm's" would end up paying more to get an outfit to attend the wedding in. You may want to explore other options for the men that might be lower in price.
CommentAuthorTeganandRob
Have you asked them to contribute? Tell them that you would love for them all to be involved but in order for that to happen they will have to contribute, if yu can't chip in you get cut!
CommentAuthorLaura JaneW
It's hard work hunni but you have to put your foot down. Just say you and your OH have talked and your budget won't stretch to all those bm's and groomsmen. Tell them they will have to pay their own dress. Just explain gently that you understand it's a lot for some of them and if they can't afford to be a bm you won't b offended! Turn it round on them! Haha. X
CommentAuthorAmyP7
I am only have one bm to keep costs down but my close friends will be involved as I'm going to ask some to do a reading and someone else to be a witness and others to help me do invites and I'm getting them all involved this way x x
CommentAuthorTatty
Thank you so much everyone! I've mentioned it to a few of them and told them we just can't afford it and mum (bless her) offered to help with my sisters dresses so hopefully everything will work out and no one will be upset. xx
Love: A wildly misunderstood, although highly desirable,
malfunction of the heart.
37 Pounds down, 22 pounds to go! I will be a skinny bride!
28th March 2014 will be the day I marry my best friend.
CommentAuthornatalie2614
I could have ended up in a similar situation but just put you r foot down love and explain that you dont have the budget for 6 of each, unless someone can pay for your bm dresses and someone pays for the suits? xx
Married my best friend 05.04.2013
CommentAuthorStaceyP91
Explain to them like others have said & see whether they will all contriute half of there dresses/suits? I have 5bmaids but im getting there dresses of the bay of E for £42 each!
instead of them being bridesmaids, give them a set role, lets them feel a part of the wedding, ie sorting out hen night, doing a reading etc xxx
30-11-13 my life becomes complete
Mrs Solomon to be
CommentAuthorb2bnicola
How about asking 2 of them to do readings, 2 of them to be whitnesses that gets rid of 4 :) lol x
Happily Married! :) xxx
CommentAuthorHayley Elizabeth
I think Nicola has a great idea, use some as witnesses and reading etc, ask them to help you out to pay too :) xx
CommentAuthorShazk
I agree think that going to be your best option and that way they still get to play a part in ur day and will part of teh whole service but you wont need to fork out the extra to dress them etc 6 of each is a lot, if they not willing to pay for their own then do the witnes/reader idea xx
Away with the flutterbys xxx
CommentAuthorbridalmiss
Or you could choose a colour for the dresses and ask that they get a dress themselves in a similar colour - I've seen BMs in varying shades of blues and pinks and it looks really good! My friend also got married last year and the guys all wore their own suits, but he got them matching ties - which is loads cheaper than hiring 3 piece suits each for them!
CommentAuthoralmostmrswood
I have 4 bridesmaids and have kitted them out for less than £100!! Dresses are from amazon £10.99 each, perfect colour, tea length and look stunning on. Shoes from shoezone, £8 each, again gorgeous and I'm told very comfy. Bracelets and necklaces were £2 each (so £4 per person) from newlook and accessorize.
Hair is being done as a wedding present (one of BM's is a hairdresser and is doing mine too) and we used artificial flowers for bouquets but you'd never know they were fake. I'm not sure exactly how much the flowers work out at but certainly not expensive.
You don't need to spend a fortune for everyone to look great. Our men are in kilts so it is near impossible to avoid the hire prices there. I'm so chuffed with my bridesmaids outfits though!!
CommentAuthorTatty
I finally stood up to all of them and oh my gosh...ALL HELL HAS BROKEN LOOSE! I had shouting from some tears from others and full on temper tantrums from one of them, baring in mind I had tried to mention it nicely first and they just shrugged it off I thought it was going to be ok but apparently not :/. Anyway I am now apparently bridezilla and ''aren't thinking about anyone but myself'' oh the joys of wedding planning :(
Love: A wildly misunderstood, although highly desirable,
malfunction of the heart.
37 Pounds down, 22 pounds to go! I will be a skinny bride!
28th March 2014 will be the day I marry my best friend.
CommentAuthorSam
Look on the bright side, at least you won't go into debt to dress them for your wedding.
CommentAuthorLoz K
That's just awful! Just remember whose day it is, you only have to please yourself and your OH, nobody else...
CommentAuthorMrsG2b
You're not supposed to think about anyone but yourself!!! Grr selfish people make me mad!!! Why would you want people like that to even be involved in the biggest day of your life if they are moaning about it now!? I say have none of them! Just go for little flower girls and page boys?xxx
Got together 10/11/08...Engaged 25/11/11...
I become Mrs G on 25th May 2013...
...the other exciting parts will follow!
CommentAuthorLauraJo87
Ugh, nightmare. Do they not understand that you don't have an unlimited budget?! They'll get over it xx
My Beating Heart Belongs To You
30 August 2013
The First Day Of My Happily Ever After
CommentAuthorKarenB9
well i would say that least you know which ones are wanting to be a bridesmaid to help you on your day !! and which ones only wanted to be a bridesmaid for the dresses and title and would be no help to you
CommentAuthorRennie1989
You're going to have to be cruel to be kind. I had a lot of girls who eyed me up when I told them of my engagement, but now I only have 3 bridesmaids, maid of honour is my best friend and the other two are my fiancé's sisters. Another friend wanted to be bridesmaid but because of budget and lack of contact with her anyway I apologised and told her no, she now no longer speaks to me (her loss). Just explain the numbers and how it eats up a large portion of the budget, which is not fair on you or your H2B, if they sulk and moan, then just ignore them. I think it's selfish of them to not contribute if they know about this.
CommentAuthorTatty
MrsG2b I would but I don't have many children in my family as everyone has grown up, I decided I just want my best friend and my one blood related sister (the rest are all half/step/H2b sisters) although I haven't told anyone yet as I know it will end in crap again and I've only just got over the last epic fit everyone had. I also had the issue of my step sister saying she would pay for her dress which was lovely of her but I then had to explain it isn't just the dress we can't afford, it's dress, shoes, bouquet, hair, makeup, nails and everything else they apparently need. All in all I've decided to be a little sneaky and told everyone (apart from H2B) that I've decided to scrap all my plans and start over when we have a year to go, that gives me 7 months to prepare myself for WW3.
Love: A wildly misunderstood, although highly desirable,
malfunction of the heart.
37 Pounds down, 22 pounds to go! I will be a skinny bride!
28th March 2014 will be the day I marry my best friend.
CommentAuthornatalie2614
Im getting matching suits and Ive bought the ties for our BM, groom and my dad. After christmas I'll just take them to get suits to match in colour to h2b's, doesnt have to match in style though.
