Ok so my h2b best man has let him down massively. So long story short they have agreed he will no longer be fulling the role. Now my h2b wants to ask another very good friend of his to play the role only this friend does not like me at all and slates me at every opportunity. I have aired my opinion on this choice and also told him it will not be a comfortable day for me knowing the things he has said and done to hurt me. I find it difficult that h2b still considers said guy to be a close friend at all but I tend to steer clear in general social situations and keep a pleasant attitude and small talk when needed. I just don't want this on our big day what do I do???
The trouble is you h2b probably feels very let down by his first best man so may just be thinking about himself and what is best for him unfortunately. Maybe try leaving the dust to settle and then talking the situation through again x
Don't know how your h2b could be good friends with someone that slates you at every opportunity He wouldnt be invited to ny wedding atal, let alone be the Best man. I don't think I'd marry someone who would let his 'friends' treat me like that.
Maybe tell h2b to have words with said person that he needs to accept you & make amends or that he won't be attending. X
.how can he make a speech complimenting you etc if he feels that way about you
It's both of your days, although ultimately it is his choice id say it's still both of your weddings. And these roles are important to both sides so I don't think someone who has caused that much of a situation should be quite as important on your big day, I'd talk to him again and make it clear you really don't want him there rather than that it'l just be uncomfortable etc! Good luck Hun xx
The best man has to do a speech about how happy he is for you both...how can he possibly do a speech that is all lies, I wouldn't want my partner to have a best man who hated me and who has nothing nice to say about me, he probably wouldn't even take the role seriously, I'd be worried about him making the situation difficult and hard on purpose. It's your day and you should feel relaxed and comfortable at your own wedding c
It's both of your days so I don't think anyone should be there or have a big role if you don't like them or they have been unkind to you. I know I wouldn't feel happy after a year of planning, saving, & generally being totally consumed by wedding planning only to feel like crap on the build up or day itself. I say tell your fiancé no way.
This is madness of course he can't be best man yeah ok it's h2b choice blah blah but the guy dislikes u how can he stand next to your h2b at cermony, speech etc. Not to cause trouble but why would your man even want him ? would u have a maid of honour he was unhappy about ?
Is it worth trying to have a clear the air talk between you, your H2B, and the potential best man? You can explain how the friend has made you feel and the friend can have his chance to talk openly as well. Then maybe you can find a resolution that allows you to move forward. Perhaps your H2B would be willing to let that happen before making a final choice.
Hi sounds like my Fiance always believes the best of everybody when proved wrong still doesn't believe it :)
Hi try chatting to your h2b and explain why you don't want him as the best man x
I look at things this way....you love the man you are going to marry...he has family and friends you may not like but you have to accept them. Speak to your fiancé and ask him why he is choosing this person while you feel uncomfortable you may find there are other reasons he is so loyal to them
Go and talk to this 'friend ' face to face.... when asked directly what his problem is with you he will have to show true colours,and be put on the spot
My husband mentioned a friend of his that should be part of his wedding party and I can't stand this guy. I explained to him that the people involved in our wedding should love us BOTH and be happy for us BOTH. They are the people you want supporting you on this occasion. I'm not taking away the fact this guy is his friend, but he was so bloody rude to me and one of my family members, why on earth would I want to see him standing there with my husband at the end of the aisle? My husband agreed when I said it should be people who love us both and wish us well
The best man is meant to compliment the bride however it is possible to still do a good speech without complimenting the bride. Just roll with it it's not a nice feeling feeling like he dislikes you but hey it's one day an honestly it won't matter on the day trust me!
My h2b has chosen his brother as his best man. Me and his brother have had a very up and down relationship with each other. But he is really happy to be best man and is excited probably more for his brothers sake, if your h2b friend is a friend he will just support his friend do a nice speech, if not he isn't a real friend. Maybe just air your concern about the speech/behaviour on the day but you might have to go with the flow, you might be surprised.
It's your day and h2b should be more considerate. I'm surprised he even wants him at your wedding if this guy doesn't approve of you
If your hubby to be really respected/loved you he would not put you in this situation. X
I can't imagine the best man being someone who didn't like me. It's awful your in that situation Hun. My H2B has some friends I don't like but I'm not sure he would be friends with anyone who slated me xx
I don't particularly like the best man he's quite patronising . But I just suck it up I don't have to deal with him
This is a nightmare I would have to put my foot down and say he can't have him I would be worried all the time about what he says in the speech !!