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UKbride Member Request 25 Jul 2017

My post from before .Hi, can I have a post please I'm engaged. Want to be...

My post from before .Hi, can I have a post please I'm engaged. Want to be married in 2020. Do you think it's fair that I just want a registry wedding between me and my partner and two witnesses. It's not about money but more to the fact his family don't bother and i dont talk to mine . I never wanted a big wedding but scared of the family arguing that they weren't invited. Any advice is welcome.We would prefer to just have a reception part where everyone is invited. But I don't want to disappoint anyone. My closest family know and understand. But I have a huge family that never bothered but I know they'll have something to say. His mum and stepfather are the only ones that talk to us and see us. There have been accusations that I'm controlling stopping fiancé from seeing them etc but truth is they've never bothered in his 25 years of life. They only started saying this when I stood up and said that his sister needed to make more effort. I just don't want to have them ruin the day like they ruined our engagement. Thanks to everyone that gave advice on my last post.

23 Comments
Bethan Roberts
Bethan Roberts 25 Jul 2017

If they never bother and do actually say something tell them to do one xx

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 25 Jul 2017

Where does fairness come into it?Nobody is owed an invite to your wedding. Plan it how you want,invite who you want

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 25 Jul 2017

It's your wedding you can both do as you want and if they're annoyed and can't understand then they obviously care more about what they want and not you or your oh feelings x

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 25 Jul 2017

I found that weddings bring out the absolute worst in people. So you do what works for you and your fiancé, what will make you guys happy and no one else. It's your day, your money you're spending, your memories. Do what's best for you

Angie Norris
Angie Norris 25 Jul 2017

do what you & your h2b want, its what makes you both happy not anyone else. good luck.

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 25 Jul 2017

I am getting married in October I'm only have 2 people at the registry office, then having a small party at our local club I would hate a big wedding its your day do what you want

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 25 Jul 2017

Do what you want- It's your day not anyone elses. People who can't accept your wishes don't deserve to be there anyway. 🥂

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 25 Jul 2017

That's what I wanted bit my h2b hasn't been married before so wanted something a bit bigger to include family, now he's wishing he had agreed with me. It's ure day so do it ure way, someone will always have something to say no matter how u do it so do it how u want, good luck x

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 25 Jul 2017

Do whatever the two of you want to do. You two are the only people that matter. Don't worry about what could happen afterwards, just focus on having an amazing day with your H2B xx

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 25 Jul 2017

Honestly, forget everyone else. They don't matter. If they want to argue amongst themselves about it, so be it. You don't have to respond to anyone or anything if you don't want to.

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 25 Jul 2017

Mug everyone off and go abroad, have a wedding/honeymoon and a party when you are back.

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 25 Jul 2017

My fiancé and I have both been married before. I have a large family but he has a relatively small one, both his parents have passed away whereas both of mine are remarried. Some of his family don't want anything to do with me because I'm simply not his first wife. So we aren't having any family there. We are having 8 close friends and not even telling anyone when our wedding is barring those invited. We are having the wedding we want and will have a party at some point after for everyone to come to if the want. It's your day and you should enjoy it

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 25 Jul 2017

its your wedding its up to you what yous want have your registry wedding just invite the parent both sides and any siblings best man and you moh or bridesmaid its your chose and either keep it quiet just go for a nice meal or have a reception and invite everybody then good luck x

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 25 Jul 2017

That's absolutely fine. It's your wedding and you're day. It's not about the ceremony or the party afterwards but about you and your husband to be

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 25 Jul 2017

Please remember that it is your wedding sod the rest who don't bother. Trust me if you spend too much time worrying about what they think you will just stress yourself out. It's about you and your partner nobody else everyone else should even feel privaliaged to be going to the reception in my opinion. I've been in the same boat and regret a lot of stuff about my wedding. So please take my advice and do what makes you happy xx

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 25 Jul 2017

I'm going to Gretna green saving all the trouble

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 25 Jul 2017

If thats the case I would have the quiet wedding you want no need to tell anyone that you don't want and if they find out after and kick off more fool them as they will have just proven why u didn't invite them and all be the time its too late to ruin the perfect day. Only u and your OH matter the rest are just ppl we have to put up with ;-)

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 25 Jul 2017

A friend of mine recently went on holiday and announced their marriage online with pictures after they wed! Needless to say we were a little shocked but it was what she wanted. When they came home they arranged hen, stag and reception parties for friends and family. I believe you should do what is right for you, your wedding is about you and your partner and nobody else.

Danielle Ryde
Danielle Ryde 25 Jul 2017

me and my fiancé are having a small wedding with close friends and family with a big reception for others who cant come to the wedding so its completely ur choice I think a small wedding makes it special to u then other family cant invite people who weren't invited in the first place x

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 25 Jul 2017

Do what you and him want, and if that means no fuss and a few witnesses then do it. I like the idea of a party with everyone there, almost like a blessing/reception. Ours isn't big and fancy as both families are very small, and just having those there who have mutural respect for us. I hope you have the perfect day!!

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 25 Jul 2017

Totally agree with my daughter Amy Barker it's your day to enjoy xxxxxxxxxx

Emma Gibson
Emma Gibson 25 Jul 2017

My step dad has a big family and the only time I ever really see them is big family birthdays. The last time I saw them was 5 years ago at my mums 50th, so there's no chance I'm inviting any of them. I'm not paying for people I don't have anything to do with. They way it was said to me was would you buy them £100 meal if not, don't invite them.

Even if they do kick off about it Hun, if they don't really bother with you both does it matter? You may get grief for a bit but it will die down. It's better than you feeling awkward on the day or something xx

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 25 Jul 2017

your day your rules. those that matter won't mind and those that mind don't matter. or you could elope!! xx have a great day what ever you decide. :)

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