UKbride Member Request 17 Jul 2017

Okay so one of my bridesmaids shes really begining to make me feel asthough...

Okay so one of my bridesmaids shes really begining to make me feel asthough she wont turn up on the day of my wedding? Reason being so far shes cancelled on me for 2 things which have been imporant to me one of which being my sons 1st n shes meant to be one of my best friends i dont know what to do? Do i tell her i dont want her as a bridesmaid anymore because i think she will cancel or go ahead n still let her?

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 17 Jul 2017

Why don't you talk to her? If she is your best friend you should be able to talk. Maybe she didn't realise how important you thought the first Birthday was or for her to be there. See what she says then decide

Naomi Chappel
Naomi Chappel 17 Jul 2017

Definitely talk to her like Jane said. See what she says and go from there x

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 17 Jul 2017

I had this issue with certain guests.... who did let me down! If you have a gut feeling now, don't waste your time cos you don't want to be disappointed on the best day of your life! Maybe ask how they feel and give them the option if they want to step down?

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 17 Jul 2017

A birthday party is very different to a wedding......

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 17 Jul 2017

Ever thought she had a good reason for not coming ?

Sonja Gibson
Sonja Gibson 17 Jul 2017

Spoken to her about being let down a few times and yes i know a wedding and a bday party are 2 different things but i have a gut instinct i will be let down at last min n i have her reasoning as to why but dont feel asthough it's the real reason bcoz its the same excuse as other times ive been let down by her

Lucy Lewis
Lucy Lewis 17 Jul 2017

Hi I agree with the others talk to her ask her if she would rather come as a guest good luck :)

Becky Dodd
Becky Dodd 17 Jul 2017

I've had to do a similar thing with my maid of honour recently. It is your day and you need to do what's best for. I agree you do need to talk to her but you don't want to be stressing about anyone else on your day.

Jayne Timmins
Jayne Timmins 17 Jul 2017

I would talk to her about your concerns, because if you don't it will make you feel worse if you let it build up

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 17 Jul 2017

I would tell her she is no longer a bridesmaid even if you have to make an excuse this is what I did xx

Emma Gibson
Emma Gibson 17 Jul 2017

I agree with the other comments that I think it's worth talking to her. Ultimately though Hun it's your wedding and go with your gut instinct x

Amy Taylor
Amy Taylor 17 Jul 2017

I agree with everyone about talking to her and maybe asking her if everything is ok in her world. There might be something going on that you're unaware of, if that's not the case then tell her how you're feeling (no-one can ever argue how you feel, it's personal to you) and ask if she'd still like to be a bridesmaid or if she'd rather be part of your special day as a guest. Whatever happens, just remember why she's a friend and why you asked her to begin with - and then relax and get back to enjoying the excitement of getting married. Best of luck :)

Amber Neat
Amber Neat 18 Jul 2017

Talk to her! You need it sorted before she lets you down on the big day

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 19 Jul 2017

Definitely try to talk to her - I tried to talk to one bridesmaid about my concerns re her behaviour at my 30th and how worried that made me about my wedding day - her response was to pull out citing my unreasonableness! If she's a true friend you'll be able to have a genuine conversation- if not at least you know!

E Wilson
E Wilson 25 Jul 2017

Talk to her. It is always good to talk about your concerns


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