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UKbride Member Request 20 Jun 2017

Hi is anyone experiencing the same opposition as we are my future MIL is...

Hi is anyone experiencing the same opposition as we are my future MIL is refusing to come to our wedding as she feels she isn't wanted there, also she is afraid that later down the line I would divorce my husband and take his house :)

18 Comments
UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 20 Jun 2017

I'd say "If you don't want to come that's fine but the only person hurting your son here is you."

Angie Norris
Angie Norris 20 Jun 2017

let her get on with it, if she goes, she goes. if she dont her loss not yours. sounds harsh but its yours & your h2b day not hers. good luck.

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 20 Jun 2017

Invitr her if she dont go her loss my mil never come ti mine and my ex husbands and was no loss only the important people mattered

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 20 Jun 2017

Wow! It sounds like she's saying these things so you don't go ahead with the wedding! What's your H2B said? Maybe you need to have it out with her in a nice way!

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 20 Jun 2017

Is there a reason she feels she wouldn't be wanted there ? Is there as particular reason she has focused on his house ? Have you got on with her until this ? If you have could you include her in some aspect, may be she could be in charge of favours ?
Write her a letter- big fan of doing this as the recipient will re read - Explain that she is an important part of her sons life and as such will feature hugely in yours, that if you thought for a split second that this marriage wouldn't last the test of time you wouldn't show the discourtesy of marrying her son in the first place
By doing this you are showing your maturity ....
I know how you feel though ... my MIL actually told my hubby I was only marrying him for his money ( in 14 yrs I've never even touched the joint account ! )

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 20 Jun 2017

I'd invite her and if she continues with her moaning just ignore her. If she's invited she's clearly wanted there! Also speak to your partner about what she's saying and if he doesn't have those worries of you taking his house etc then he should tell his mum to stop being silly. Also ask how he'd feel if she really didn't turn up xx

Heather Hawkins
Heather Hawkins 20 Jun 2017

I don't think I would want her at my wedding. Let her crack on.

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 20 Jun 2017

Sounds like he's a mummy's boy and she craves attention, leave her to sulk if she shows up great if not her loss. I was asked in the early stage of dating my man if I was willing to have a written agreement before marriage of course I don't mind he had debt when I met him

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 20 Jun 2017

Stick two fingers up...im sick of awkward people i had so many people moaning whilst planning MY wedding....i wish id of told them all what to do x
If people have a problem with anything and they dont want to come then tell them not to come
As long as you and ypur husband are there what does it matter

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 20 Jun 2017

Can anyone outside this group see our comments on these threads?

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 20 Jun 2017

Eh? It sounds like she has personal issues.

Lucy Lewis
Lucy Lewis 20 Jun 2017

Hi Marie C. everyone can see the threads but you can put an anonymous question or answer if you want to :)

Emma Raisborough
Emma Raisborough 20 Jun 2017

Invite, her, if she doesn't come then its her loss, but at least you made the effort and can't be blamed.

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 20 Jun 2017

Wow she seems like a delight ! Not
Invite her , hopefully she won't come ...

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 20 Jun 2017

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 20 Jun 2017

Sounds like she's being melodramatic! And trying to divide u and you future husband. If that was me I'd ask my partner to have a word with her. I'd send her some flowers saying you can't wait to be a part of her family and hope that she will be there to be a part of hour special day.

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 20 Jun 2017

This could be my question from years ago!
If you invite her she can't turn it around on you in the future.
We did this, took the higher ground, after an initial rumour (since proven to be true as she tried to implicate the best man) that she was planning to halt the wedding with false accusations of me cheating - yes really lol - she didn't come anyway! Yes we were out of pocket for the 6 family members that didn't turn up but they couldn't say we didn't try.

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 21 Jun 2017

Mines just a nasty piece of work. As soon as she realised I wasn't going to put up with her snide comments about our house and me losing weight she threw her dummy out the pram and said she wasn't coming....Bare in mind we haven't even set a date. She said she didn't think it was right because I stood up to her she told my H2B that I would do it to him as well.

I say sod her, it's no loss to anyone else. She'll get an invite out of respect to my H2B but no one will begging her to come because she loves the attention.

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