I really don't want to invite one of my uncles to my wedding. He has always been distant from me and the rest of my family at best, despite living less than an hour away he rarely comes to any family events. He has also been downright nasty, accusing my nan of caring every day for her elderly sister in law in her final years "just to get money and to exploit her" (my nan has a heart of gold and this is the last thing she would ever do, my uncle may I add never cared for or even visited his aunt whatsoever). He has also sent nasty emails to my mum calling her "cruel" for trying to organise a rare day out for their parents, suggesting that as they need a little more help mobility-wise than they used to they just sit indoors every day instead! I mentioned to my mum that I didn't want to invite him and she said she and my nan would be upset if he didn't come as it "wouldn't be right" and they are prepared to forget what he has done in the past as "he is family." He has never apologised or even shown any remorse for this previous upset and I don't forgive him for hurting my beloved mum and nan. I really dislike him, and really do not want him to be a part of my wedding day but I don't want to upset my family.
Hi just explain to your Mum and Nan that you don't want him at the wedding :)
I agree with Lucy. Try to explain again as it will clearly upset your day x
This is your day! Not theirs. They need to respect that what ever you choose. I am facing a similar problem with a family member that I do not want to invite.
Talk to your nan. Explain that no matter what they say about forgiving him you can't. And go from there. If you feel strongly enough about not having him there then don't xx
I'm with Amy on this one. Your day, your guest list, your rules. If you don't want him there, don't invite him. You need to surround yourself with people who love you and you want to be there on the most important day of your life.
Or, look at it another way - sad but true, I'm afraid. Would you buy him let's say, £120 worth of present? If the answers no, then don't invite him, because that's pretty much how much you'll be spending on having him there when you don't really want him there. Better to spend it on someone you know will appreciate it.xxx.
Don't invite him. Simple. If you don't like him that much there's no dilemma
Its YOUR wedding not theirs. Personally i wouldn't invite a trouble maker Tell your nun and nan that you want no trouble on your special day and this man can't be relied on nit to do this. Also you only want those who you are close too and he isn't one of them
I wouldn't invite him, will you miss him if he isn't there. No! I didn't invite one set of aunt and uncle and their children as I don't like them. Z
its ur day you have who you like there :) i didnt have certain relatives and neither did my husband due to not getting on with them x
Simply don't invite them. My partners cousin is getting married, we don't speak as hate each other, and so we aren't going to theirs, and them not to ours. Being immediate family and all, all goes out the window.
It's your day if you don't want him there don't invite him, I have problems with some of my family and I won't be inviting them and my whole family know about it and understand that, it's not about them it's about you and how you feel x
Invite him sounds like he wouldnt come anyway
I would send him an invitation but include a letter from you .....
" as you will see I have invited you to my upcoming wedding, this has been done purely on the wishes of nan, I would do anything to make her happy and apparently despite the vile things you have done/ said to her and the rest of the family you being there she feels is 'right' ,
I have seen the upset you have caused,you may think that the couple of minutes spent writing an email is it..but the hurt continues to go on.
You could take ownership of what you have done and do the right thing by apologising but I'm not sure you feel sorry.
Obviously it is now up to you if you come,but at least you know my open & honest feelings "
Id invite to the reception...not the weddin...wedding cerne r ormaly for close family and friends and receptions extend the celebration...hes not super close..hes an extention..peraonally id keep him at reception only xx
I have someone like this who I do not like. I haven't invited them cause I want to see people who will be generally happy for me on my big day xx
It's your wedding day and you don't need negativity. I'm not inviting half my family for that reason. Family is what you make it and you should surround yourself with people who make you feel happy and loved xx
I don't speak to the majority of my family ! Would rather have close family and friends there ! If you wouldn't buy them a meal in a restaurant why would you at a wedding ?
It's tough, but perhaps ask your nan as I assume it's her son. Explain why you feel this why and what it means to you if he is there.
From what you say he probably wouldn't come anyway, but it would be the time he decides to make an appearance.
Frankly he sounds like he has a chip on his shoulder
I doubt he would attend from what you've said about him.
Chances are he won't turn up anyway if he doesn't go to any other family events, I would invite him, then if he doesn't RSVP then don't book him a meal etc, if he doesn't turn up then at least you tried, good luck and have a wonderful day xxx
It's your wedding at the end of the day. If you feel uncomfortable having him there, then he shouldn't be there! I hate one of my mates girlfriends, so she's not invited, end of.