Rachael Cass
Rachael Cass 14 Jun 2017

We are going to have a small wedding, family only and it will be abroad. Is...

We are going to have a small wedding, family only and it will be abroad. Is it wrong to tell my father in law he isn't allowed a plus one? Reason being is he has a new partner every few months and I don't want some random person in my photos. If it was big would be easier to avoid but it won't be. Thoughts?

18 Comments
Lucy Lewis
Lucy Lewis 14 Jun 2017

Hi if it was me I wouldn't want a plus one I didn't know at my wedding. I am not asking any plus ones to attend if I don't know them before my invitations are written:)

Rachael Cass
Rachael Cass 14 Jun 2017

Thanks Lucy, just wanted to checking I wasn't becoming a bridezilla ha

Naomi Chappel
Naomi Chappel 14 Jun 2017

I agree with Lucy. Is your h2b ok with that too? X

Rachael Cass
Rachael Cass 14 Jun 2017

I've mentioned it, he seemed fine just not sure how his dad will take it. As everyone else who will be there will be paired up

Emma Raisborough
Emma Raisborough 15 Jun 2017

I agree, I don't think you are being unfair by doing this. Good luck :)

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 15 Jun 2017

I'm the same my brother is back with his ex and I refuse to invite her unless closer to the day(if they are still together) I get what you mean xxx

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 15 Jun 2017

She doesn't have to be in the pics x

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 15 Jun 2017

I know what you mean, I had a friend who was always with different blokes and when we got married I made sure I didn't put a plus one on but also spoke to her and said about numbers without telling her the real reason.
I had a rule that if I hadn't met the partners then they weren't invited, I wouldn't walk into a restaurant and pay for a total stranger to have dinner so why would I do it on my wedding day? We had my husbands ex wife at our wedding which I was fine with and was my idea, mainly because his older kids were invited and so were her other kids (his step kids) which he still has a good relationship with. I just sort of made sure she wasn't in any family pics or owt (good job as she's turned into the awful green eyed monster since then) I did make sure photographer took so photos of her with her kids ect.
If you father in law to be does take things badly could you not maybe allow him to bring her but make it clear that she's not going to be in any group photos? With it being a holiday maybe he'll feel lonely. Whatever you decide to do just make sure both you and hubby are in agreement as long as you are then nothing else matters hun. Good luck xx

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 15 Jun 2017

I don't think you're wrong. If he brought someone and they broke up a month later,you're the one stuck with this woman in your wedding photos

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 15 Jun 2017

Not unfair at all.

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 15 Jun 2017

just say you want it small wedding close family and you hardly know tthe person and you want your dad for the day by himself the budget small and limited space so sorry his partner not going x

Ashley Power
Ashley Power 15 Jun 2017

"No ring, no bring" is our motto with plus ones lol

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 15 Jun 2017

Or let her come but you don't pay for her and she doesn't go in pictures ,father in law wants her there her pays end of

Alys Brierley
Alys Brierley 15 Jun 2017

I gave my sister a plus one for her fella she was with for 4 years they've recently broken up and now she's on a mission to find another one and I don't know how to say erm no .

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 15 Jun 2017

If your Dad is happy and that's who he's with at the time then why not? If he's going abroad and they are also having a holiday surely you would all get to know each other?! I'd just be glad that he was happy and let him share the special day with someone, but that's my opinion x good luck

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 15 Jun 2017

It's your dad's choice of course he should have his partner there it's none of your business how long they've been together you should be happy to have them at your wedding

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 16 Jun 2017

Not unfair at all. We made the same decision and get married next week. We know it's for the best. At a wedding abroad your all going for a holiday too so you should know the people your going with so you know you all get along. Xxx

Celine Harland
Celine Harland 16 Jun 2017

My H2B and I decided we'd have nobody at our wedding either one of us had to be introduced to. An easy way of saying "no" because our wedding day is ours and intimate. You are invited because we both love you so please don't be offended . That said, we have lost one guest because of this policy but heh ho, obviously we don't matter or mean enough to that person so good policy in the end

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