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UKbride Member Request 14 Jun 2017

I have a bit of a dilemma. My partner and I have always wanted a very...

I have a bit of a dilemma. My partner and I have always wanted a very relaxed wedding abroad. Beach, fizz and family. My niece had cancer and although she is a lot better her parents don't want to take her away (which I totally understand) But now I feel like I have to choose between having my brother and his family at our wedding and having the dream wedding we've both always wanted. Has anyone else ever had to make a decision like this during their planning? Any ideas of how to deal with this are welcome, even wacky ones!

45 Comments
UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 14 Jun 2017

Could you have a celebration at home with your family and then maybe have a small destination wedding where you want to have it? With less people

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 14 Jun 2017

Have your dream wedding and live stream the ceremony for loved ones at home (they could even have their own celebration in your honour) and then have a party on your return for everybody xx

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 14 Jun 2017

My brother is getting married in Malaysia this November and we cannot get over for it and they are having a service at a registry office then going for a meal in the summer part because being officially married in Malaysia is proving tricky and partly because numerous family members can't get out to the wedding in Malaysia. Xxx

Jasmine Jasiukiewicz
Jasmine Jasiukiewicz 14 Jun 2017

My sister got married in st Lucia.
She said to everyone we are more than welcome, and she would love to have us all there however it's going to coat xxx so me and my h2b had to say no because of the money, however I would have never stopped her doing what she wanted, that was their dream and she had it.

Dee Gilham
Dee Gilham 14 Jun 2017

I'm getting married in Greece. My grandparents were never going to be able to come and that is upsetting. It's always a hard decision but you have to do what is best for you and your partner. Have a live stream and a party on return for the people that couldn't make it.

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 14 Jun 2017

Have your dream wedding abroad then have a big celebration party when you get back so those who couldn't make it can attend. Best of both worlds

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 14 Jun 2017

I got married in Cyprus. We had so many friends and family members that couldn't make it. So we had a party when we came home to celebrate our wedding. Put my dress back on and had a slideshow of our wedding photos. It's a really hard decision but my wedding was so perfect the way I wanted it, don't regret my decision at all! X

Catriona White
Catriona White 14 Jun 2017

Could do dream wedding there but a blessing back home followed by lunch (my uncle did this and worked well). Or if they are essential to your day how about Cornwall in summer? Not quite the same as abroad but would do you for relaxed beach wedding without overseas travel or leaving the NHS at home.

Laura Roberts
Laura Roberts 14 Jun 2017

Go for your dream wedding and have a party for everyone when you're back, that's what my sister is doing. Her partner's parents aren't able to travel long haul but they wanted to get married in Dominican Republic so when we're back we're all going to get dressed in our wedding gear so everyone can see :) xxx

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 14 Jun 2017

Have your dream wedding, I'm
Getting married in Cyprus next year, and my dad can't make it as he is terrified of flying. Even though I was devastated , I want to have the wedding I always wanted. Have a get together when you get back and have everyone their, including people you wouldn't necessarily have at your wedding. Hope your sort it.

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 14 Jun 2017

Yes but we chose to get married at home, in the end the day was special because of those around us and we will still have a blessing on a beach one day with just us x

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 14 Jun 2017

Can't you have your wedding in england on a beach and then just go away for your honeymoon?
I suppose you just have to decide which is more important to you.. I know I would pick my brother and niece over a beach xx

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 14 Jun 2017

It depends on how important it is for you to have all your family with you. Like others have said if it is your dream then go for it and have something here when you get back (that way you get to wear your wedding dress twice!). For me I couldn't get married abroad because having all my loved ones with me when I get married is far more important. I hope you get what you want xxx

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 14 Jun 2017

Have you thought about UK beach wedding? I know the weather is not always what you want but can make the wedding what you want and have all guests there

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 14 Jun 2017

Depends really on what you want. To me I couldn't imagine not having my family with me. So I would do the formal wedding here first so your family can appreciate them being there and then have a blessing on the beach somewhere beautiful x x

Lucy Lewis
Lucy Lewis 14 Jun 2017

Hi have your dream wedding it is your brothers choice if he wants to come or not, I have something similar to contend with :)

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 14 Jun 2017

I'd go for what you and your partner wants as it's your day it's what makes both you happy

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 14 Jun 2017

Marry abroad and have a party at home with a celebrant so you can personalise words to you husband in front of friends and family who couldn't join you xm

Marie Karkoszka
Marie Karkoszka 14 Jun 2017

My OH really wanted to just jet off to a beach somewhere or vegas. I explained I couldn't do that because I want all my family there especially my nephews. We actually compromised and found a beautiful hotel in Dublin that's on the beach (he's Irish)
So we kind of have that holiday feel but it's close enough that all the family can come.
Have you looked into any beach weddings in the U.K.? If you get the right time of year and the right place it can be like being abroad

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 14 Jun 2017

Have your dream wedding followed by a blessing when you get back for those who are unable to travel abroad

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 14 Jun 2017

Go for your dream wedding. My husband wanted the wedding abroad but I wanted my family and friends with me so we got married here. Only 2 of my family came. Lucky I've got loads of friends to make up numbers then we had people saying why are they invited all day and other were just the night. Got really stressed over it. Even though I loved my wedding i wish we had just gone abroad now. Me, hubby and daughter xx

Naomi Chappel
Naomi Chappel 14 Jun 2017

I like the idea of live streaming the wedding back home or having it on a beach here x

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 14 Jun 2017

Yes and we done beach wedding which is today and then a reception at home for those who cannot come and will put a copy of the wedding on the projector on the reception day

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 14 Jun 2017

Abroad. Family and friends would hate for you to change plans because of circumstances outweigh their control. Have a family celebration when you get back.

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 14 Jun 2017

What's more important having your brother and niece there or getting married abroad !!!

Ash Harding
Ash Harding 14 Jun 2017

I would say have two ceremonies, a real quick one here, cheap and nothing special so he can watch you say your vows and feel part of the day, and then go all out for your dream wedding :)

Or stream it live to him, or just take photos with him when you get back from your holiday so he can feel part of it too :)

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 14 Jun 2017

Go for a beach in the UK! This venue is amazing ....

http://www.tunnelsbeaches.co.uk/weddings.html

Amy Wright
Amy Wright 14 Jun 2017

Have your dream wedding and a little ceremony/reception back home after to include them? Xxx

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 14 Jun 2017

Find a nice beach location here and jet off the following day for honeymoon or stick with the original plan and have a blessing here followed by garden party??

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 14 Jun 2017

VIDEO LINK ......

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 14 Jun 2017

I got married abroad, my dad had MS so couldn't come or give me away, we done a live steam so he could see us marry and had a party when we came home so got photos of us together too xx

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 14 Jun 2017

We wanted to get married abroad, but none of our elderly grandparents would have been able to travel, then my grandad got told he only had a few months to live so we had a very casual wedding at home, surrounded by everyone who loves us, we plan to renew our vows for our 10 year anniversary and have the wedding we had always pictured. You need to ask what's more important to you, having your dream day, or having your brother and niece be a part of it. For me I couldn't imagine not having my family at my wedding, my daughter and niece were my flower girls, my sister was bridesmaid, my nephew gave me away and my brother was best man Lol but obviously everyone's different and you need to do what feels right for you x

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 14 Jun 2017

Having got married last year in cyprus. There was a few important people who were not at our wedding as they couldn't afford to come out etc.. we had a big party at home and put dress and suits etc back on, celebrated with everyone who couldn't make it to the day. I don't regret it one bit as it was the most perfect day and just how me and my husband wanted the day to be. Xx

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 14 Jun 2017

Have your weddin abroad and have a blessin here and party after.keep everyone happy.xx

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 14 Jun 2017

You could if you want have a small civil (or church) wedding here, just for family with a dinner and still go abroad for your dream wedding? I know people who have done this x

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 14 Jun 2017

Go to the Isles of Scilly, all sun tropical with beach and palm trees, you can. Get a boat there and still classed as uk, you could have it there then go on honeymoon xx

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 14 Jun 2017

You should have your dream wedding, your brother might still change his mind. If he doesn't come you can have a big party back home to involve your brother's family and other family and friends who couldn't fly out with you x

Jodie Howard
Jodie Howard 14 Jun 2017

This is a difficult situation, why can they not take her away does she still have cancer or is she in remission? I ask because going away could possibly be nice for her after all the pain cancer brings. I am not sure how you can get around it though!

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 15 Jun 2017

you could get married here but take your wedding clothes away with you and have a wedding photo shoot on honeymoon. x

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 15 Jun 2017

Have your dream wedding abroad. We did that and lots of people who are married have said that they wished they went abroad for theirs. Its totally up to you and how you feel. As others have said you can live stream the ceremony. Alternatively a beach wedding in the UK or so.ewhere accessible by eurostar/ferry could be an option? (Obviously depending on whether your neice needs healthcare or just not allowed to fly)

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 15 Jun 2017

We're getting married abroad with only a few close family. Then we're having a blessing in a church over here for other family who couldn't/didn't want to come abroad.

Amanda Cosgrove
Amanda Cosgrove 16 Jun 2017

You could put please wear colour, as we would like to have a bright future

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 17 Jun 2017

You could always have your dream wedding abroad and then have a blessing here in the UK which runs much like a wedding so everyone gets to feel involved xxx

Kim Matthews
Kim Matthews 17 Jun 2017

We are getting married locally because my OH's mother can't really travel. I went along with it because he wants his mum there, which I can't blame him as I want my mum there, but I am a little disappointed. The wedding is not very 'me', which I have to admit has left me dragging my feet on buying things and organizing things. I am not really very enthusiastic about the day at all as it gets nearer. My advice to you is to think about it very carefully... something you may think you are ok with may not feel like that as it gets nearer. You need to be more than ok with it.

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 17 Jun 2017

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