So I need some advice. When we started planning the wedding we told our mums that we wouldn't be involving our brothers within wedding party. Obviously still invited though. This caused an issue with his mum as all the sisters are being involved. They are all bridesmaids. After some long discussions we decided we would include brothers as it made life easier. We picked out colours told our mums and everything was fine. Yesterday I spoke to his mum about some other stuff and the subject of suits came up. She told me she's wanting to put his brothers in grey and pink. I told her I didn't mind the grey (even though I'd already said black to her) black pink isn't in the colours we picked. She then said well it's fine as their only there as guests. I reminded her that they are walking down the aisle with the bridesmaids. She got a little huffy then. My question is am I being too bridezillery?? Our colours are royal blue and yellow we don't want pink as its not a colour either of us like. My other half reckons we should just invite them as guests so she can buy the suits she wants. I feel like this might cause more issues. Advice please. I really don't no what to do
Hi I am having a similar issue we told his Mother to not interfere as it is our choice> I hope this helps:)
its ur day, ur decision. end of.
Its your desicionand she should respect that. Maybe your h2b could talk to her and say they are either part of the wedding party and they wear your colours or else they are not part of the party and they can wear whatever she likes.
It's just been a pain. Were already having issues with his stepdad. We don't want to make it worse but she keeps trying to change things. His brothers are 6 and 10 so don't want to stop them being part of it just cus of this. If that makes sense?? Xx
honestly this is your day and if you want them to walk with the bridesmaids then they should match the bridesmaids! I would just have to put my foot down and either have my fiance pull him mum to one side or you do it and say we've thought about it and we want them to wear.... so you're not giving her an option to have an opinion as it isnt a question!
I think if they are now part of the wedding party that they should wear what you tell them to.
Say if she wants them as part of the wedding with a role then yellow or blue or if she prefers green if she's not happy then say they'll just be there as guests but let her decide
I know it's a pain and not to your colour scheme but you've got to weigh up if it's worth the hassle and stress for you to argue about the colour. If it's very important to you then stand your ground, if not don't stress and just let her do what she wants
so she has a fit about them not being included, then when you incude them moans about what you want them to wear???
sounds like she just wants to cause a problem to me.
If she wants them to be included in the bridal party then they should wear what you and your H2B want them too, if she wants to provide the outfits in her choice then they should only be invited as guests - simple! x
Not at all if they're party if the wedding party then you'd assume they would wear the colours you had chosen that match the day, it would look a little strange if they didn't.
You're damned if you do and damned if you don't. Do what you and your husband-to-be want :) x
Id tell her to do one lol its your day not her's! X
If they just go as guests but have matching suits with pink its going to look like they are part of the party(as theyre grooms brothers) but will look too mismatched from the rest. Its your day whatever colour you want them in should be what they wear
If they're part of the wedding party then surely you and htb will be choosing the suits? Although I have to say I do think bride and groom should pay if it's the wedding party...and if you're not paying you kind of can't dictate (sorry to play devil's advocate!)
No not at all it is yours and fiancé day so she shouldn't be telling you what to do like I say to my mum it's my day not yours
If you chose black suits they wear black suits. I'd stick to your guns your colours or not part of the wedding xx
Parents are paying purely because my mum offered to pay for my siblings. 1 sister 2 brothers. We then told his mum and she said she would do her side even though we offered as he has 2 brothers and 3 sisters. So more. I feel like if I let her have her way with this one shell want to change other things. His stepdads already said he's not coming so had quite a bit of stress from her side already. I just want an easy life but not willing to change everything. Make sense?? Xx
I'd stick to your guns too hun, some people you just have to be blunt (but nice) and tell them how it is, either they wear your colours or they will have to sit with the other guests. It's your day don't be bossed around hun Xx
If it was me I would give her the choice of them being involved and with your wishes for colour choice or not being involved, having her colour choice and attending as guests, some people just need to feel that they are in control/charge. Its your special day your choice of colour for the wedding party goes without saying, afterall it will be on your photos for a lifetime!
They can't have both. They're either guests who can wear what they want or they're a part of the wedding party and they wear what you want. What is it with people and weddings thinking they can dictate?! Xx
It's ur wedding not ur mums or his mum so it should b wat u say
It is your wedding therefore EVERYONE should have to do what you want. It is your big day therefore it should be your way or the highway. If that makes you a bridezilla then so be it, this is how it is for my wedding x
100% not bridezillery. I think either option could cause drama so which option will work for YOU and your fiancee? If they're in the wedding party they would wear what you choose. If not, they can wear what they like but then they don't walk down the aisle with the party.
Lol, my wedding will have a no pink rule, and I'm as far from bridezilla as you can get. Is she telling you what the bridesmaids should be wearing or telling them to wear what they want? I think it's more to do with the fact that as the grooms mother she doesn't feel included. Give her a job. Let her be part of the planning somehow and I bet her attitude changes x
All these posts moaning about mother in laws to be makes me think just how lucky I am cos my future mother in law is lovely Lorraine Fenton
Do what would make you happier. I would put my foot down and say if they going to be part of the wedding part they have to wear your colours. If they don't like it they can come as regular guests as your originally wanted. Don't let any parent boss you around, it is your day
If they're in the wedding party i.e. Ushers, best men, page boys they wear the same and generally coordinate with the bridesmaids. Put your foot down! Its your wedding. Let her huff...
I honestly think this is way out of line, not on your part. This is exactly the reason my other half and I are not telling ANYONE any details at all, too many opinions cause a lot of issues. You are paying for and organising the wedding (I'm guessing), so how is it up to anyone else what colours you should have? Just having extra people in the wedding party is a gesture in itself, I honestly don't think you should roll over and let others dictate to you on this. This is your wedding day, many people only have one wedding day so you should own it. You are not being a bridezilla just for saying you don't want pink, if that's the case then H2B is a groomzilla because he doesn't want pink either. I'm so sorry for the rant but I have been in this situation too with people trying to tell me what I should do for my wedding and it makes me so mad!! Your day, your say. I hope you are able to enjoy the rest of your planning! :) xx
Give her 2 choices - 1) they wear what she wants and aren't part of the wedding or 2) they are part of the wedding and wear what you want them too. People in our wedding party will wear the same.
Not her wedding! Remind her of that! You pick what colours you want, she don't like it tuff. Enjoy ur day cx
Honestly, it's your wedding so do exactly what you want. A friend who's just got married gave me the best advice which is be a bridezilla otherwise you just try and please people and you can't please everyone. They tried to please people and it was exhausting, so do what's best for you. You originally didn't want them in the wedding party so I wouldn't have them and then they can look like weird twins in matching suits. Xxx
I'm having brothers and sisters walk with me as me and my partner have a grand total of thirteen but only twelve of them will be walking down, I have asked my side to contribute towards costs as the grooms side have done a hell of a lot for us, everyone is in grey suits (yes, also the women) with royal blue ties/bow ties and suspenders. If they don't like it. Tough sh*t. It's one day. It's not going to kill them. Xx
I would very nicely and very sternly remind her that it is your wedding and your colour theme is royal blue and yellow and if she wants them to wear pink then they will be there as guests and not members of the wedding party, hope this helps xx
I'd remind her they are part of the wedding party which is what she wanted therefore they need to wear what you hace requested pls.
Tell her that's fine but they won't be part of the bridal party.
Whos buying the suit? I think if your buying the suits then you can stipulate if not then you cant tell people what to wear. I bought bridesmaid dresses but we discussed it as i wanted my best friends to feel good as bridesmaids. The men wore their own suits and we bought ties.
Tell your FMIL to bugger off
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