Hi all, My fiance and I got engaged in 2014 and booked our wedding last...

I think you're over thinking it. You yourself said that only a couple of people will be going to both weddings.

I think you need to take a seat back and relax. It is normal to worry but I don't feel like her day will tarnish your day. She probably doesn't even know you feel like this and i bet she didn't book it with the intention of stealing your limelight. As you said there are only certain people going to both your weddings and i very much doubt they will compare weddings when attending either. Only you will be the one comparing. I don't think there is any need for you to not attend or be worried, it happens and there's nothing you can do to stop it!! Good luck x

Your being a tad irrational, maybe just concentrate on your own wedding and what you want. You don't own the year or anything else just because that's when your getting married. You say you aren't a bridzilla but this post makes you sound exactly that.

Seriously love u need to get a grip. Ppl that go to both will know u have had yours planned longer and its more like shes getting in first. Trust me lifes to short to give a toss about things you have no control over. Focus on your wedding to hell with hers xxx

I booked my wedding 2 months after my mums. And separately have designed a very similar 'type' of wedding. We just both like similar things. Our centrepiece are nearly identical! Neither of us care. We're both getting our special day

Wow I understand you're wedding is important but you can't stop people getting married the same year?! Maybe that was the only date they could get that year At the venue they wanted to suit their friends and families?! It's not like it's the same venue! She's entitled to whatever wedding wherever she wants it. You're clearly not even close to her she's your husbands family and as you've said there's only a few people attending both, it probably wouldn't have even crossed her mind to "ask" you if it was ok seeing as you're probably massively insignificant in her life... Grow up, and concentrate on your own wedding an what you want. You are the one making it into a competition not her, and why?! Does it matter whose is bigger or better?! Surely all that matters if you got the venue you wanted the date you wanted and you're marrying the love of your life. Geez

People get married all the time, I honestly think you're over-reacting, and would try not to let it get to you. I'm sure they meant no disrespect in booking their date, maybe they didn't want to have a long engagement and picked a date that held special meaning to them?
With regards to you feeling like the 'copycat' wedding, I really wouldn't worry about it. As you said already, only a small handful of people attending her wedding will be at yours, none of your other guests will know, and to be quite honest, I've been to a lot of weddings (family and friends), and can't for the life of me remember details such as colour schemes, food choices.. not even the dresses of some of them! What matters most is that you're marrying the person you want to spend the rest of your life with, and you have people there who want to celebrate your love with you- Also, it's just one day... it's not worth getting upset or causing a family rift over who got there first. Just be happy that there are four of you who are happy, in love, and about to start the next chapter of your lives together.

If you knew she was going to have something similar would it make you change to something you like less? Probably not. So you will still have the day you want - similar or not it will be what you want for your day.

You can't stop other people booking their wedding before you, it's not even in same venue! Anyway everyone has their own ideas for the day which makes each wedding original so I wouldn't worry bout it

Definitely over obsessing. If you are this anxious nearly 18 months before your day you are gonna give yourself a heart attack by the time it comes round. Put the other wedding to the back of your mind and just concentrate on planning for your day, and try and enjoy it not stress over it.

Slightly bridzilla! don't worry bout it just concentrate on your wedding an making it how you want it you can't expect people to put their dreams on hold because your getting married theres 365 days in a year your day will still be magical.

Personally I think you may be over thinking it a little. You should have your day how you want it to be and I'm sure it won't be exactly the same as every wedding is different. It may be a similar venue but not the same. All that will matter on the day is that you get to marry the one you love. I have been in the same situation where I have got engaged first and then a friend got engaged and has had her wedding before me. My bridesmaid got engaged after me and is getting married the week before me but I'm enjoying talking to them about their weddings. It hasn't bothered me at all because in the end we will only have a small number of guests the same and and I'm planning the wedding that myself and my fiancé want. The only thing that has worried me is if I can't get the time off work for the wedding the week before mine due to the time I'm having off for my own. I do really want to be there and I'm looking forward to it.

I think the best thing to do is just to try to see it as a totally different wedding, nothing at all to do with yours. No one will be comparing yours to theirs when the day comes and the chances are they will choose very different themes etc. I don't know about it not being the done thing, I wouldn't bat an eye if one of my cousins booked their wedding a few months before mine as long as its not on the same weekend...after all you can't expect the whole year to be reserved just for your wedding. The chances are it'll be a very different day to yours, they've probably just picked a similar sort of venue because ultimately there are only so many choices for wedding venues, unless yours is something really off the wall and different it's unsurprising that they've found something somewhat similar. Don't let it stress you out, there are bigger things to think about :)

Hi,

It sounds to me like you know that you are being irrational. And whilst I understand how this is something you feel, you really need to get over it and let this be a fleeting feeling.

Other people are allowed to get married, and the very nature of the bridal business means that there may well be similarities between your days - ivory dress, flowers and sparkle, anyone?

All I can suggest, is that you understand that your day (I iterate, your *one* day, not year) is about you and your husband, therefore make decisions based on what is right for you and your personalities. That way, it will be a reflection of your partnership, which is unique.

Aside from that, getting married is not a competition, it is not oneupmanship, it is union of two people who love one another.

It seems to me that you both aren't that close in terms of family, you aren't sisters or anything, so I don't really see a problem if i'm honest. People gett married all the time and people with use similar ideas to yours, and unless you have a custom made dress then someone somewhere will be wearing exactly the same dress as you on their day. Especially as you say there won't be that many of the same people there's not going to be an issue. Just focus on your day. No one will be comparing weddings, they all know you are both different people.

Enjoy your day, forget about the dress being similar I got married 6 months before my sister in law and a month before oh cousin and 3 months before my 1st cousin. 3 of us had similar dresses but laughed about our good taste and venues for me an my cousin were same. But had different styles an even if it were similar we all had amazing memories for different reasons x

no two weddings are the same tbh i think your over reacting a little just because she got engaged after you and booked are wedding few months before yours does not mean she will copy you yes she might have same ideas etc but what does that matter take it as a compliment she likes the same ideas etc x

Bridezilla alert! Guess what, the world doesn't revolve around you!!!!! Hundreds from other couples will be getting married in the weeks and days before your wedding - some of them may have a similar dress and even (shock horror ) have the same decorations or favours as you!!!! You have no right to dictate when or how anyone else gets married! You've already stated there's only going to be a few people at both weddings so there really isn't an issue!

I think you should plan your wedding exactly as you wish and not think or worry about hers. It's your wedding and I highly doubt that all things are going to be very similar.

I doubt they planned to hurt your feelings but at the same time they probably were in a position where they could book and pay for theirs sooner and knew the date and venue that suited them.
We went to 5 weddings last year and 4 were close friends all in the space of 2 weeks. Everyone remembers each wedding for different reasons so I wouldn't worry that guests will be at theirs and yours! When you plan a wedding you have to be selfish to your own needs which is probably what they've done!

I am engaged an I don't care who is at my wedding or what everyone wears to be honest the dress I want can be made for less than wedding shops cause it's simple an personal to me I know all the people that love me will be at my wedding an no matter the venue food or anything else I will be marrying the man I love infront of the people I love and that's all that should matter. Also someone can only copy you if she knows ur plans and if she doesn't then why are u so worried. Be happy your getting the wedding of your dreams some people never even find that special someone

Oh get a bloody grip or you will end up pushing everyone away! You are acting like a first class spoilt brat. There are millions of dresses out there it will be bloody hard to both pick the same bloody dress and all wedding dresses have their own unique touch to them!

Hello I notice your wedding date is in a years time, trust me when I say, from experience (my wedding is a week and a half away), that once the date approaches you will be so caught up in planning your own wedding that you won't even have time to worry about this other one. I generally don't think guests will be too worried about brides wearing similar dresses or similar themes, your guests just want to have a great day and all the focus in on the bride and groom in their day. Please don't add more stress to your planning , planning my wedding is one of the most stressful things I've had to do and there's honestly no point in worrying over small things like this. Concentrate on your own wedding as everyone else has said and I promise you when the day comes it will be special and yours, doesn't matter what's the same or who's the same etc. I'm wearing a similar wedding dress to what my friend wore but you know what I liked it so I don't give a toss, every wedding is unique so please don't worry too much.

Get over yourself. No one cares about your wedding as much as you do, if you remember that, the pressure should be relieved a bit. You need to think about why you are getting married... make your wedding personal to you and your husband. Unless they are the same people it will be different. Think about what is important from the day. For all you know they considered timings so they dont clash with you and steal your thunder. She will probably be in a white dress, there will be food, dancing, a nice location and the standard wedding speeches. Like nearly every other wedding since the dawn of time.

The complicated answer would be yes you are over reacting but you are also totally justified to be miffed! Firstly, your day will be your day. You will love it and no one will compare it with any other because it is yours. But you also have the right to feel that your 'thunder' is at risk. I feel slightly miffed that my h2b's friend is having exactly the wedding we had originally planned 5 months before ours. Ours has totally changed because of circumstances but still it feels a bit hinky lol.
The best thing to do is contact the other bride and have a chat. 2 family weddings so close together is always going to cause friction so why not contact her and politely explain that you don't want any glaring clashes between your big days ask her to meet for a cuppa and a chat about plans. No doubt she will understand how you feel and be willing to discuss your plans. You might even find a new friend in the process xx good luck

So I was on the receiving end of a similar situation to this. My former best friend got engaged and booked her wedding in the same year as mine. I was not bothered one bit as I was organising MY WEDDING, not hers. However she was very upset, and struck me off as a friends, blocked me on Facebook and we haven't spoken since( 4 years).
Her problem was that I had tried her dress on (I only found this out after I described it to her) how was I to know when her dress was a secret??? Things quickly escalated to her saying that I was competitive and always had been, bringing things up from the past 20 ish years of friendship...I am not competitive at all and as soon as I realised which was her dress it wasn't even a consideration for me.
My advise to you would be to subtly speak to your cousins fiance about where she is going dress shopping. See if you can gauge how she feels about it and suggest that if you choose the same shop that they remove the other ones dress so that they cannot consider it. I'm sure if you gave each others name they would do that... this is my biggest regret. I didnt even consider it at the time as I was so excited to try dresses on. As for everything else, chance are there will be some similarities a wedding is a wedding.

Weddings are supposed to be about 2 people/2 families coming together not colour schemes and wedding dates... people need a reality check when it comes to their weddings. Is it too much to ask just to be happy with what you have done not worry about what colour scheme other people (family or friends) are having and whether it is gonna clash with urs.
If you want advice and not people slating you then i would advise you just to concentrate on your day and how you and ur h2b want it. Dont worry about what other people want or what they are having at their wedding they are irrelevant. Have your wedding and enjoy yourself...

You are overthinking it. Don't let it worry you. Your day is about you and your h2b and the cousin's day will be about them. Just enjoy the planning and have what you two want your wedding to be.

I honestly don't think you are being a brideszilla as people are saying. I'm in the same situation. We are getting married in August and after we had booked ours my cousin announced he is getting married the week before and having afternoon tea which is what we are having so I was a little miffed to start with but now I just think I don't really care it's my day and as long as it's a good day I don't care. But I was a little gutted to start with x

I think some of the comments on here are a little harsh and on the aggressive/judgmental side as no-one really knows why you feel this way or the history etc.! At the end of the day you've come on here for advice and I think some participants need to remember that weddings are an emotional thing and brides are bound to have a bit of a wobble every now and again and we should be supporting not judging. It seems to me that you know you're being a bit over-dramatic but I can see why you would feel this way when you've planned things and why you may be upset about being usurped. I'm sure that this person didn't mean to rain on your parade and hasn't booked their wedding before yours deliberately. At the end of the day just remember that you are marrying the person you love - focus on that and who cares if you have similar dresses, decorations etc. - chances are in 25 years time you won't remember those details anyway! Good luck and keep smiling - there are bigger things to worry about and your fiance's cousins wedding isn't one of them!

Hahaha Omg hilarious 😂

You aren't being irrational, it's a bitchy thing to do! My older sister did the exact same thing to me, I'd been with my husband (then h2b) longer, been planning my wedding longer, had had my venue booked for ages, and as soon as she found out i had a set date she booked hers for two months before. Some people just have to try to steal the thunder. For me it worked out well though because where we had been planning and saving for ages and they had to rush there's to be ready it meant there's turned out tacky as hell and ours was like saying "this is how it should be done" in comparison.

Wow I think your being a tad unfair,just because you booked your wedding before her it doesn't mean she can't get married the same year.you say you may end up wearing a similar dress,that's not her fault.aslong as she hasn't seen your dress then there's nothing you can do/say about it.like you said there will only be a few people at both weddings so what's the big deal,do you honestly think she cares this much about your wedding?probably not because she's concentrating on her and her h2b,which is what you should be doing.sorry if that's sounds harsh but you are sounding like a bridezilla who cares more about someone else's wedding than her own

If you don't tell anyone your plans for themes, colours , dress etc then you can't be copying can you?
Any anyway, if there's only a few the same it really doesn't apply!
When my ex sister in law tried to get married the same year as me, we ended up having a joint wedding....but I wouldn't suggest it as that takes a whole load more planning!!

Its her wedding she wont be thinking of yours at all even more so if you are not close.
She may of been dreaming of the same ideas
Focus on your wedding not hers!

Totally irrational

Never compare yourself with another. You are unique. Your story is unique. You as a couple are unique!! So don't stress :)

You're over thinking this and worrying unnecessarily. As someone else has said this may have been the only date they could book - also I've been to a number of weddings that have been very similar to what we have planned - thats just how it goes. Focus on your own wedding, choose what suits you and your fiancee and don't worry about anyone else's wedding. If you don't you risk letting this become a fixation and ruining your own day.

I can understand being a little miffed. However if it was the other way around would u want to be told to put it wedding off any longer? Remember what the day is about.... starting the rest of us life with the one u love. Material things make the day look nice however the love and respect u have for each other should out shine that 10 fold xx

It's natural for you to be worried about your day. Please try not to. Your wedding cannot be like any other, You & your h2b are like no other couple. Maybe you can put as much of your personal characters in to the little touches. There are lots of ways to make your day unique. Enjoy your planning and give yourself lots of time to put ideas together, so you eliminate stressful feelings.

Im getting married in 18 days we have a family issue thats their problem not mine. No ones gona ruin my day xxx

Just plan your wedding. It might just be a case that you and the other bride have very similar tastes,I'm sure they're not setting out to copy you

You are entitled to feel how you wish, but your wedding is exactly that, yours. Her wedding is hers and it shouldn't matter at all. Have what you want and don't give her wedding a second thought.

Just do your own thing and let her do hers, it's not like everyone you know should put their lives on hold because you're planning your wedding.

Nobody should plan there wedding around somebody else's dates. You can't expect her to put her wedding on hold as your getting married in the same year if it was same day I would understand but it's months before yours I don't see the issue think your been a bit over sensitive

Just focus on your day , don't worry about anything else.

Am sure that was not the intention of your fiancé cousin .

Your day will be special and you will forget all about you. FC
WEDDING DAY. So don't worry and just focus on your big day

just think of how you want yours there will be still many differences as no one has the exact same tastes and after all theres 2 major difference of a different bride and a different groom. enjoy your day and dont worry what theres will ve like as yours will be to your taste and for you to enjoy. Dont care what others think its hard work as it is! concentrate on you and your fiance :-)

You need to get over yourself!!! You book your wedding which is for ONE day lol, NOT the whole year!!! So her dress may be similar to yours - if you actually look at most of the dresses around, they are all quite similar, especially if they're the same style (strapless etc). A marriage isn't just about one day, it should be what comes afterwards that's most important.

I don't get what the issue is... you said yourself she's not a close relation, so where's the problem?? Or is anyone you know not allowed to get married anytime near your wedding in case there could be similarities?! I'm sorry, but you're out of order.

There is nothing you can do but make the best of the situation however I don't think you're being irrational to be pissed - I certainly would be to begin with!
It is what it is and whether it's coincidence or intentional you can't change it so just work it to your advantage... look at things that could be improved at theirs and then make them improvements on yours.
Just don't be bitter about it - you are both marrying the people that you love and that's something to be happy about and all that really matters in the end xx

What would you suggest they do instead?

I think part of the issue here is that you have spent SUCH a long time planning and hyping yourself up so to go to someone else's wedding who is (even at a remove) in your close circle and who has such a lot shorter engagement annoys you
However, I think you should bear in mind that you have chosen a far longer than average engagement.
We have chosen a time of year to get married and planned round that. She might be pipping you at the post because she wants a summer wedding.
I've recently lost a friend (and it breaks my heart) who was engaged before me and the second I got engaged and started planning a wedding that is a quite close to hers pushed me away (and I felt it was related) and quite hurtfully cut me out her life.
It's so sad that so many brides seem to approach weddings in close proximity as a source of conflict and competition when they could help each other through the whirlwind of excitement and stress.
I understand why you may feel as you do but I think you need to take a look at whether she truly has any ulterior motives or whether you have projected insecurities or something onto her.
But that's just my humble opinion.
Love not war.

So just because u are getting married that year means that she can't get married before u? I think u are being very harsh not all people wait to long to get married and as for steeling ur thunder that sounds silly as she is entitled to get married too what is she supposed to do ? Ask ur permission on what dress she buys? It seems to me that ur jealous as ur not the only 1 that's getting married that year and that her wedding is before urs sorry if I sound harsh but I'm just being honest and saying it how I see it and it's not like ur getting married on the same day

I think u all need to stop being so rude, after all this site is for advice, if use have nothing nice to say dont say anything!!

The richness of your life is all about perception and how you choose to see things, so you are in control of this. How lucky you are to be able to marry the person you love in the venue you want, and not only this but you get to be a part of his cousins special day too. Why don't you reach out to her and share experiences beforehand and count your blessings every day as the important thing is you decision to plan for commitment with your future husband x

Don't tell anyone your themes, dress etc then she can't x

I think ur being a bit of a bridezila... im sure if u don't know what her theme is she equally doesn't know urs... do exactly what u want let her do her thing and if they are similar so what just proves u both have excellent taste. I'm sure it won't be identical. Just plan away enjoy her day as a guest then enjoy yours as a bride... If weddings are close together maybe have a chat n swap ideas.. I don't think she will have done anything deliberately.

Maybe you could try talking to her about it as she may not realise how you feel. You may even be able to plan so stuff together as that way you could tell her what you want and she probably won't want to have similar stuff? We had a similar situation where my fiance's sister was married last month and then his cousin is to be married in August and then ours is next year. I have a recurring dream that ours will be identical to there's but then realise that we have different tastes and different colour schemes so really won't matter. Your wedding is the last one people will go to out of the 2 so will be the freshest on their minds....save the best for last

The point of a wedding is to marry the one you love. As long as that happens the rest really is just bs

You would have been engaged for 4 years when you marry. In that time your cousin has found love and wants to get married too. Should she wait to keep you happy? Think you're being a bit selfish. How about you support your cousin and just be happy she is happy????

Just get on with your own plans. You can't expect your cousin to wait for you to get married before she makes her plans. Four years of planning , I'm sure your wedding will be wonderful.

When hubby and I got engaged and set our date, our friends who had been engaged for years decided to set their date 6 days before ours!
Did I feel a bit put out? Yeah, at first. But I just focused on my own stuff. We consciously didn't discuss our weddings with each other and each of us had a majorly different yet beautiful wedding.

And anyway, guests don't care if they went to another wedding a few months before that also had purple bridesmaids! Your guests are there for your day, not to compare your day with everyone else's.

I understand that you're feeling worried about this and I know it's easier said than done, but I really think you don't need to be so concerned. As others have said, you will both choose what you want and there will inevitably be some similarities between weddings. How many people have vintage/ shabby chic themes these days for example or wear a strapless gown? There are fashions in weddings and it's unavoidable that people will make similar choices, doesn't mean that anyone is deliberately copying or trying to "win" by one-upping the other couple (not that's it a competition anyway). When I got married it was in the same year as six other couples we know, one of my friends booked her wedding six days before ours and my husband's cousin got married a few months after us. It didn't matter in the slightest, we all had our own magical days and it was nice to be sharing that excitement with so many others. Only you will be focused on the details of different weddings, 2 years down the line I can barely remember some things about my own wedding never mind anyone else's! No one is going to be comparing and if you're so worried about it you're going to run the risk of not enjoying what should be a special time in your life, and potentially losing sight if why you're having a wedding in the first place. Just try to relax and plan the wedding that you and your fiancé want and let the other couple do the same for themselves. Enjoy both weddings x

Ok I'd of probably been a bit put as when your planning your wedding you want it to be amazing etc however as you've mentioned you aren't that close and not many people will attend both weddings! They probably didn't think twice about your wedding when booking theirs just went for what suited them as you did with yours. You can't expect other people not to do what they want because of what your doing especially when you aren't even close. Their special day is theirs as yours is yours.

Plan your wedding the way you want hun.. dont mention any details to anyone other than whom needs to know ect. And if your worried about the colour side of things on invites.. pick a silver or gold... (even if those arnt in your colour choice) that way you keep the main colour to yourself and bridesmaids. I dont think theyve booked those dates intentionally but i do understand where your coming from 100% dont stress over it and try to enjoy as much as you can. I get married in july and i think ive been one of the calmest brides to be considering ive 6 bridesmaides and 2 best men lol. But seriously.. enjoy your time planning and dont worry to much about anyone else. Shel be just as excited as you. Xxxx

Don't worry about it! My aunt (dads sister) announced she was getting married in December just gone, and the shortly after my dad told us all he was getting married in February. I attended both weddings, and to be honest I wouldn't have cared if they were the same! It doesn't look like you've copied, at the end of the day there are wedding trends just like fashion trends, and if you do end up looking alike no one is going to be thinking anything about it. If they are stuff them! If you feel really put out etc, just made a subtle comment in your speeches etc, that today has been a long time in the planning and you'd like to thank everyone for making it worth the wait. That you feel better knowing you started planning first, and no one else will notice!

It sucks but if your day is the way you want it then does it matter if you copy them or not.

My sister-in-law who got married 5 months before me had literally a better version of my dress (champagne colour, lace, beadings, open back, I literally had a poor man's version of hers lol). I was tempted to change it and get a different one for myself but at the end of the day this is what i fell in love with and picked out and nobody on the day thought about what she was wearing. On the day it really doesn't matter. Honestly. We had tons of the same guests because a lot of the friends (my husband and his brother's friends) were the same at both weddings and obviously their whole family was in both weddings and we had the best time and I loved my look and I loved her look and everything was perfect. Focus on your day and don't worry about theirs.

Also, my two sisters got engaged after me and they both ended up having their weddings before me. One of my sisters had her bridesmaids in floor length navy dresses which is what I had envisioned for mine since I got engaged and honestly, I was annoyed but again - it didnt matter. I still had my bridesmaids in navy floorlength dresses, even genuinely contemplated using the same exact dresses but I didn't go that far :D

So yeah. My husband and I got engaged first and then his brother and my two sisters got engaged and then married before us and every single wedding was amazing (obviously ours was the best ;) ) Good luck and seriously, don't worry about it (feel free to private message me if you want to chat further about it :) )

People on here are less than helpful. Just avoid the 'what are you doing?' Conversation with her or anyone keep your wedding a surprise.. I wanted my wedding to be so unique I didn't tell anyone I was getting marrjed. Told them it was my daughter's christening. Hahaha

For all you people with less than helpful comments.. she's not irrational, she's a woman. Every woman wants their day to be special so how would you feel if you'd planned your entire wedding to find a family member just 're used all your ideas. I know I'd be furious.
It's exactly the same feeling when youbhave good news and someone else jumps in on the band wagon. Then they get all the congrats and no one remembers what you've just said. Xxx

Calm down. Your want day your way. Her day should be hers. What does it matter if it's similar? It just shows you both have great taste.

I am getting married to the most special man I have ever met in my life. I couldn't care if someone copied everything about my wedding. The only thing that should matter is the two people becoming a partnership that day. Do it you and your fiancée and your marriage. No one else. After all the whole reason you're having the big day is for the lifelong marriage not the wedding itself right?

I don't think it's really matter, you and your fiancé have different friends different places to wed. Only relatives to attend both weddings. If it was like in our culture which we give lots of golds and money to the couple then you have reason to get angry because most gifts would probably go to your fiancé's cousin But no, just carry on doing what you doing. You have nothing to lose, no reason to get nervous about that. Just enjoy your day, you must not let anybody to put down for any reason. Focus on your big day.. I would probably count how will many people drop from your list and don't attend to their celebration..

It's as if no one else can get married in the same year as u not as if she book her wedding on the day i are getting married is it

Please don't take this the wrong way but not many people wait 4 years so most people that are getting engaged this year will plan to marry next year.... the fact it's months before she has probably chose this to not steal your thunder!! If it's not the same venue don't worry about it plan your wedding as you wish!!! If things are the same then you clearly have the same taste!!
I have learnt 1 thing!!!
Do what YOU want not what anyone else wants you to do x

My hubby and I got married a few months after his brother and wife. Even tho we have very similar taste in most things our weddings couldn't have been more different. They had a beautiful barn and rustic theme while we had a castle and vintage theme (with a bit of dc comics thrown in). Both days were amazing and memorable in their own rights. My advice would be to go ahead and do everything you wanted to do in the first place and don't worry about the other wedding. Your day will be your day no matter what. Enjoy it x

Sounds like you are being a little irrational. Just focus on putting the finishing touches to your own special day and enjoy being a guest at your cousin's without all the planning stress.
Even if you both end up with a similar theme, it will still be different. A different venue will automatically put a different slant on things and if you are putting personal touches to your own weddings that reflect each couple, again it wont be the same.
I understand your panic after planning for so long but honestly nobody is going to notice or compare unless you make it an issue xx

#bridezilla alert

People can choose to set their wedding date for whenever they want to. Did you have the freedom to choose your own date? Yes, you did, and you chose to wait a couple of years. Why should they not also be allowed to choose their own date for whenever they like? I think you know you're being a little ridiculous here if i'm honest. You and she are 2 different people, therefore your days will be completely different!

Verity Bell this is the page I was talking about!

Let her live her life as she wants and worry about your own!!!! What she has to postpone it just because you said you'd do it first? Come on grow up....

Your wedding is going to be special TO YOU regardless of who gets marrried first. Focus on YOUR wedding dear and the reason why there is going to be a wedding at all!! xx