Hey! My fiancé and myself have decided to take the guest list down from 60-30 because of finances etc and we brought it forward to February next year as we just want to get married. This was a difficult decision to make because we also made the choice to not have children there as thats over half of the adults we would have to get rid of. We were always planning to throw a bigger reception when we would be aloud so everyone can come. Are we selfish in doing this? We've given the guests plenty of notice to find a babysitter but I still feel awful and being made to feel bad because they said their children were looking forward to it. It also means they wont stay the night or stay later so they can get back home to their children. I just wanted everyone to have a good time but its difficult ???? I love everyone to pieces but man am I stressed! ????
Nope not selfish but good luck being allowed 30 in feb 😞 I’m jan and it’s still 15
Its your wedding and in current times planning a wedding is hard. Do what is best for you and your fiance.
I'm planning on eloping as we struggled to cut out list down especially as we have 8 kids. Were opting to have a wedding woth 2 witnesses then once things improve we have a big family/friend celebration. To us it's about the commitment not the celebration xx
We will b having no
Children at our wedding apart from close family and our own. It’s ur day and if you friends and family wanna be there there will child or not. Have a lovely day x
It’s your day and I am sure your guests won’t mind - especially given the current circumstances. There will be some guests that can’t make it but ultimately if they want to be there they will. It’s your day - enjoy with the people who experience it with you 💜
I would be happy to have a day of from the kids and stay over.mini holiday.xx
Children under 11 don't count in the numbers you can have at weddings at the moment :) xxx
Im sure its 15 guest through to March anyway so your gonna save even more cash!
Your not being selfish at all, at the moment you have to do what is best and findind other dates is a struggle so just stay with your date, if people don’t understand ask them to put they’re selves in your position. I’m January, we don’t know what happening until 2nd Dec at the minute we’ve cut from 100 to 15 so we’ve just got parents and very immediate family.
Chances are it'll still be 10pm finish in Feb. As that was down until march time...
I don't think your selfish at all! It's your wedding! ❤️ Enjoy x
We got married in October and we cut children, my husband said children won't really remember and was easy way to save numbers, its difficult times you are not being selfish we also had to cut plus ones, everyone understood xx
Not selfish at all but please remember that the rules for inside events is under a 6 month review. So at the moment, unless things change dramatically, the rules will still be in place in February xx
We are (hopefully) getting married on the 5th December. Because we can only have 13 guests, we have said no children as guests
Not selfish love.. ive done the same.. ive gone from 170 to 30🙈 doesnt fit in aunties or cousins.. I also feel bad but my other half just wants to be married now also.. am now happy with food and drinks hopefully xxx
I'm sure they said it was 15 people until March as well.. So you might have to cut it down further, it is difficult but if you've done it for finances as well as just wanting to get married go for it! It doesn't matter what anyone else says, yes it might rustle some feathers but if they really cared about you then they would understand x
Oh my o couldn't imagine trying to organise a wedding with all this going on! Credit too you for that!
It's your wedding Hun so honestly do what's right for you. It's your day and it only happens once!
For my day it was a no brainer. Family is mine and my husband's life so the kids had to be there. By the end of the night some were asleep on the dance floor 🤣 pretty much just danved themselves out. Was Uber cute.
But that's not for everyone! Just do you! ❤️❤️🤞🤞 I hope everything goes as planned good luck!! 🎉🎉
My wife and I got married in 2019 and we still said no kids. We had limited space and honestly I wanted my friends and family to really enjoy themselves and let lose and they couldn't have done that with the child there. X
Wow, after this year they should be grateful any of them are invited.
I know of people just doing close family in lockdown or postponing.
Could you skip/change the food so it’s cheaper? Idk
We said no children at all, although we had our 2 year old there, as we wanted a chilled ceremony and reception without kids crying and to let parents enjoy themselves! It's your wedding, have it how you want
Not being selfish at all. We only allowed our 2 grandchildren, and 2 nephew's to ours last year. Our friends and family were all happy having an evening out without them x
It's your wedding you do what is best for you lot of people try and please other people so much me and my partner are having a small wedding just imediate family then having a reception back home for the rest of the family who couldnt attend we only having our children and siblings children there for wedding day and party when we back home as we both have big families and financially it wouldnt be possible to invite everyone , enjoy your big day x
Nope I’m with you on the children front and I have kids! I’m only having mine & nieces/nephews there. People can try and guilt trip but numbers are limited already x
I had a no children wedding (due to restrictions on numbers). Its a very common thing to do now and with the cost of the weddings most will understand. Its your day. Stand by your decision. Hope you have a wonderful day. 😀 xx
It’s your wedding. We had like 10 of us at my wedding & 150 at the reception - do what stresses you out the least 👍🏻😘
We have literally just got married at registry office just us and 2 witnesses. We plan to hold a big celebration party after covid. At the end of the day we wanted to be married and everyone understood
Not selfish at all! I work in the wedding industry and I’m a mum! I’ve seen it all! I as a parent don’t get offend with a child free invite - I take the time off and can relax have a drink without having to worry about the children.
If you’d a childless couple then I think people are more understanding.
It’s your wedding do what you need to do to get married xx
You could always have a blessing later and a huge party for everyone when we are out of all of this. Really feel for you though. It must be hard after all the planning. Good luck with your celebration xx
No you’re not and if most parents are honest they’d be glad of a few child free hours.
My husband and I got married in 2019 and we said no children except our daughter, nieces, nephews and godchildren (8 in total) because of limited numbers - everyone understood completely. We did ruffle a few feathers with some people who didn’t come to the wedding but we found the people who kicked up a fuss were the people who we don’t really see anyway. It’s your day and your money - do whatever is right for you x
Do whatever you need to to have the best wedding day for you as a couple. It is absolutely noone else's business. We had ten people, and it was perfect.
Me and my fiance are planning to change our big wedding to a registry office wedding and ours isn't until 2022. Covid has wrecked everyone's weddings and you need to do what's best for you
Don't stress, it's your day, for once you can be a bit selfish and have it the way you want. People who truly care about you will understand. Hope you have an amazing day. Xx
We could only have 13 guests. We enjoyed our day just as much! But we're throwing a big anniversary party/vow renewal next year for everyone who couldn't come xx
We are getting married 2nd attempt in april and have said if we need to restrict numbers in anyway first to go is kids (except our own) even my maid of honor who will have an 8 week old baby said she understands and she wouldnt miss it for the world x
I say, the wedding is about two people...not the guests or their children or any busy body. These circumstances are unusual, and my advice is for couples in love to get married...sod what others think! Life is too short to try to please everyone else...
I'm not having children at mine either and everyone's totally fine with it 😊 it's your wedding and people shouldn't be making you feel bad about your decision
Its your wedding and plenty of people say no kids allowed nowadays. If anything it gives parents a night off, if they so wish! Don't worry about anyone else's opinion but yours and your partners. Good luck
It’s your wedding! We have said no to any children except our own, we want everyone to enjoy the elegant day and not have a kids club!
Unfortunately you have to be a bit hard faced. My dad gave me good advice ‘if people want to be there they will’
That is all you can do. It’s not your stress or concern what others do x
It's great to do things your way but it won't work for everyone. Just don't be offended if they can't make it or stay as long youd like them too. We didn't go to a wedding because they didn't invite our son it was 3 hours away and it meant we would either have to do 6 hour round trip or leave our baby over night. We weren't willing to do that. The bride and groom havnt spoken to us since which isn't nice but my baby came first. Maybe when they say but we won't be able to stay long respond with that's OK we understand but we'd still love for you be there.
Absolutely not selfish. In the slightest. Its your day. Crack on with it as you want it. If anyone has an issue, especially in the current climate they aren't worth your time or friendship
My best advice would be, remember its your wedding, your special day and you're paying for it!!
If you have accommodation on site, maybe suggest a company where they can provide hotel babysitters? That way your guests can stay the night still and have the safe knowledge that their children are only upstairs, with an Enhanced DBS checked professional babysitter? Or ask the guests to pay for their own wedding nanny or put some money towards having a wedding crèche? ☺️
Under the current circumstances, the important part of the day is that you marry the person that you love and want to spend the rest of your life with. A party can be had anytime. No you're not being selfish, the people who are making you feel bad are the ones being selfish xx
We got married in August, 12 guests only and had a marvellous day, your wedding day is for you not the guests, do what makes you happy, those that really care for you will make the effort to be there xx
Very much agree with Nicolla . 👏👏💝xxx
The venue I was looking to book didn't count children under the age of 5 in the numbers but they would still get food (just a smaller portion), the venue is in Essex so definitely worth an ask as I'm having kids at my wedding but took 7 out of the number total straight away!! Also if you are on a budget & not booked yet have you looked at Groupon? That's where I found my venue & my wedding when get it booked would be £1900 for venue, food, dj, overnight stay etc & is for 50 guests, but you do only get a 4 month window to book the wedding once you have bought the voucher!! Hope your day goes well!
It’s so difficult, especially in these circumstances. It's not being selfish, it's your day and you've got to do what's right for you as a couple.....you can renew your vows and throw an even bigger party in year's to come. I wish you the very best wedding day. X
You made the choice because of how you see it . Others may view your choice differently and not understand your choice as its not something they would ever choose to do .
I'm sure your guests will be understanding. Hopefully, the guest numbers will be back up to 30 by February. Your actions to have a smaller wedding with less financial pressure is more popular than you might think 😊
Your wedding, your choice
We had a child free wedding and most parents were happy to have the night off
Don’t worry about it x
I had no children at my wedding. If people didn’t like it they didn’t have to come. Lots of people lived a night off to relax.
At the end of the day it's your wedding day and night. Not theirs. They are not the ones who have to pay for it. Don't worry about why they say or think enjoy Your day xx
It's your wedding and your decision. It's hard, but even more so when restricted to a certain number. Personally, I would choose a to have wedding without children. At the end of the day, people should respect your decision and celebrate your special day with you xx