A friend is very keen to be a bridesmaid. I’d like her to be my witness and don’t want to upset her. I’ve got a card and want to try and make it likes a bridesmaid proposal. Do you think she’ll be upset? How can I make it special?
I was in a similar situation. I made her a witness, and like you, gave her a "will you be our witness" card. She was over the moon with it. I also gave it to her privately and before I'd asked the bridesmaids so that she disnt expect to be asked to be a bridesmaid. X
Personally, I don't think she should have reason to be upset as no-one should expect/assume to be a bridesmaid.
However, in the card, you could put we would love you to be a part of our special day, and sign on the dotted line alongside us. Will you be our witness?
I'd say being asked to be a witness is more special than bridesmaid as you only get 2 of them.
Will she get her hopes up having a card though?id never even think of giving my witness’ a card to ask them.she might think it’s a bridesmaid one and then be upset when it’s not?i dunno just a thought x
I was a witness for my Dad's wedding and a bridesmaid for my Mum's and both felt equally special.
Being a Witness is more of an Honour than a privilege. Maybe you could have her on your top table too instead of a bridesmaid
I thought your bridesmaid was your witness??? 🤔
Your moh is your witness and best man your partners? That’s usually their job anyway x
Yeah I had my cousin as my witness/moh and my oh had his sister wasn't a massive wedding my daughters where my flower girls not really sure of ur set out but usually ur moh is ur witness xx
No one should just expect to be chosen so if she’s upset then that’s not your fault. Tell her a witness actually signs their name on the register which is an official document, it’s a very important thing and the wedding wouldn’t be legal without it. No doubt they’ll still be photos taken of that moment too
Our bridesmaid and bestman were witnesses
I did cards for my witnesses. And neither were apart of the bridesmaids or grooms men. They both felt really honored i did the male a button hole flower and tge female a coursage for her arm and got them both gifts for the end so they were just as included as the bridesmaids/groomsmen.
Me and my fiance have made it clear that we aren't doing bridesmaids due to me having 3 younger sisters and him having one sister (she's been my friend since we were 7) and they all agreed, I expected them to be when we got engaged 5yr ago, but 2 kids later and health issues have prevented us from tying the knot. We're having my best friend of 17 years as maid of honour and his dad is best man (took him on as his own when he met his mum 3 months pregnant). We're just managing to save enough to get a deposit for the registry office and British legion for reception.
I think your friend should be very honoured to be asked as a witness. If she doesn't understand then you know what kind of friend she is and know how to treat her from here on out. Good luck xx
It may have been traditional to have MOH and best man as witnesses, but more and more people aren't doing this as they want to include other people who are special to them. We did for that exact reason. MOH and BM are already involved and special. By all means have them if you want, but you are not obliged to etc. Personally, I'd be honoured to be asked to be somebody's witness even if I wasn't bridesmaid. I think it's a lovely gesture and hopefully your friend feels honoured too. Do what makes you happy though, it's your wedding 💖.
My bridesmaid WAS my witness
Being a witness is more important than a bridesmaid in my opinion as their signature will always be on your certificate x
Is there a particular reason she can’t be both?? My maid of honour was also a witness...
A witness is on your paperwork for all time ,a bridesmaid is there for the day
No a witness gets to be important and sign the book bridesmaids don't. So it's just as important roll too.
Why can't she do both my daughter walked me down the aisle, she looked amazing and then was also my witness. Hope you have the best day ever x
I agree, I think it’s just as special of not more! I’ve got someone who I’m asking to be my witness but not a bridesmaid as I want them to be part of my day and know they’re a big part of my life. Just explain to her the importance of her being part of your day in this way, arrange a gal date for you both and will be perfect 😘
Weddings are tricky....
I asked someone who wasn't a bridesmaid to do a reading instead; just as special!
I have a similar situation and I’m so glad it’s not just me. I love the idea of the ‘will you be out witness’ card. Thank you.