Wanting some advice on a difficult bridesmaid every dress I pick it’s “horrid” but she has found a particular dress that she loves but I don’t like and told her I don’t like it but she won’t let it go
Your day, your choice! Tell her to fall in line or don’t be a bridesmaid!
Your wedding, she wears what shes told!
I agree with Kate. It’s what you want. It’s an honour to be asked. I’ve worn some right dresses over the years but it’s all for love and respect of the bride xx
She sounds like a nightmare, it's your wedding not hers.
It could be that she's worried about how she looks in some styles. What is the difference between what you are picking out and what she wants? There could be a worry about comfort etc. And whilst it's your wedding and your choice do you want your bridesmaid to feel self conscious or uncomfortable all day?
It could also just be her being awkward but you need to have the conversation
Wow some people are harsh! She's your bridesmaid so must be a close friend. If you want her to enjoy the day with you then she needs to feel comfortable and confident in what she is wearing. No point forcing her to wear something she hates. Keep looking together and find something you both like.
I think it depends who’s paying for it. I paid for everything for my bridesmaid i felt I had the last say that way. I don’t think you do as much if you’re asking them to pay! That’s just the way i feel!
Your wedding your choice.
I want my bridesmaids to be comfortable on the day just like I wanted to be when I was a bridesmaid. At the same time you can't have something you don't like either as it is your wedding. You both need to try and compromise.
Of course you want your bridesmaids to feel comfortable in their clothes, but maybe it's a style issue or body confidence thing. What is it about that style that she likes so much, or is it the texture, the shape, the colour?
Then I would gently remind her you have a certain vision for your wedding and that it would mean a lot to you if she could be part of that vision with her.
Hopefully then she'll be on the same page as you and you can look at other designs together that have aspects of what she likes and finds comfortable, but that is in keeping with what you want on your big day.
Honestly she needs to get her act together! One of my oldest friends didn’t feel comfortable in the strapless dress I had fallen in love with for my bridesmaids, she said she would wear it but I knew she would be deeply uncomfortable all day so I arranged to have straps added to her dress so she was comfortable. They still looked the same but she was comfortable and if I had wanted them identical then she would of worn it how it was as it was my day.
My bridesmaid knows that I'll take suggestions and I'm taking on board what she likes BUT I have final say. Honestly, sit down and talk with her. Find out what the exact issue is and see if you can't find a solution. However, might be worth reminding her that ultimately, it's your choice and if she isn't happy then maybe she'd be better attending as a guest so she can wear what she wants
Your day your choice. Tell her if she not happy you can find someone to replace her.
Wow, bridezilla’s everywhere. Yes it’s your wedding and I’m sure you have a vision, we all do. However a wee bit compromising may help? I was a maid of honour once and thought I’d happily wear anything the bride asked... and I would have... but when trying things on there were certain ones that I felt incredibly self conscious in and wouldn’t have been comfortable all day. I never said no to any of them but did voice my concerns about how I felt. She ultimately chose something else that we were both delighted in and that was that. I don’t think you want your dearest friends to be uncomfortable or feel awkward at all.
Your day your choice, I get married next month and can’t even tell you the dramas I’ve had over a meal! Some people don’t realise that it’s yours and your partners day nobody else’s yes everyone needs to feel comfortable but she can’t just say she doesn’t want the dresses you have chosen without a reason why
If my bridesmaids are happy, I’m happy. There are my dear friends/family and I wouldn’t impose anything on them that would make them feel uncomfortable. No ones that precious, regardless if you are the bride. I want my wedding to be remembered for the right reasons xx
You wouldn't make someone wear an outfit they dislike for any other event or celebration so I just don't understand why brides insist on it. Let her choose something she likes that fits some criteria you give her so she'll be identifiable as a bridesmaid which is the only reason you should be thinking about what they will be wearing. Your bridesmaids are there to help, they are not props for photos and shouldn't be made to feel uncomfortable by being forced to wear what you want them to! If they are adults, treat them as such. Some of the stuff brides have been force-fed into thinking is important by the wedding industry is just nonsense. Bridesmaids are human beings not accessories. Also your dress sense might suck and she doesn't want to look like an idiot. I've overheard so many guests at weddings say the bridesmaids look bad and judge the bride on her terrible dress choices, those infinity dresses look cheap and rubbish and all people will do is say it's sad you made them wear them. I realise this is controversial stuff to say but hey, I've let my bridesmaids choose their own outfits and pay for them and will give them a button hole each so people know that they are part of the wedding party. Don't get so wrapped up in the planning that you forget your bridesmaids are not there to look good for you, they are there to help you and they won't be happy if they hate what they're wearing.
Why not find three dresses you really like and then ask your bridesmaids to vote on which one they like that way you like it but they feel included in picking one out x
This is why I have only asked one friend and my daughters as bridesmaids. They’re the only people I know won’t cause problems, cut their hair, get pregnant or hate what I want them to wear. Does that make me a Bridezilla? Probably. Do I care? Nope
I found loads I liked in Debenhams and took all my bridesmaids together to try them on with the idea they could be mismatching but they all ended up loving the same dress so it was win win. She will want what looks nicest on her and you want what looks nicest on her so eventually you'll find something that you both like!
Who’s paying for the dress? If you’re paying then I believe it’s 99% your choice, like it or lump it buttercup 😆 if, though she is paying, then the boot has to be on the other foot to an extent
I completely agree. Like it or lump it. It's your day. I have two bridesmaids, one to which was fussy with the dresses I showed her and the other said she'd wear anything which was great. The fussy one wasn't overly keen on the dress but between us we agreed that they could have different sleeves. They can wear whatever shoes they like, do their hair however and do their makeup however but I do believe the dress that the bride picks, should be worn.
Depends who's paying for the dress. If you are expecting her to pay she should have a say in what she wears however if you are paying I would say it's like it or lump it (within reason) I'm paying for my bridesmaid dresses and whilst I went with what they wanted which was they needed straps and not fitted, everything else was my choice and it was pretty much... This is what's happening and that's it 🤗
It should always be an honour to be asked to be a bridesmaid. They are there to help not create extra stress for you. She should wear what you want. However find out why she doesn’t like it. Is it the style or colour? Meet her half way. Maybe get her a shawl or bolero to make her more comfortable. Has she tried it on yet? Don’t whoop her ass over it. She’s your mate for a reason, be kind but also be firm. It’s your big day after all. Good luck!
Its your wedding so its your way or no way dont be soft if u have to be a bitch then do it u go girl
Your wedding, your way
It’s not her choice
Just ask her to watch 27 dresses. I’m sure that film will just sum it up for her
I'm lucky. My bridesmaids and I have fairly similar taste. I loved my dress when I was a bridesmaid so I hope I mine will like the ones I have in mind. Yeah the day belong to the bride and groom but doesn't give you the right to make your friends and family uncomfortable
Wow is a wedding worth more than a friendship? Remember the friendship May last longer than the marriage (God forbid) so don't make a mountain out of a molehill.
Tell her its your wedding your decision if she doesnt like it she doesnt have to be bridesmaid.simple as that
If they were a real friend they would wear what you have asked them too I have got 4 adult bridesmaids and all of them have said they will wear what I chose, at the end of the day if your paying your choosing if she doesn’t like it then maybe she shouldn’t be your bridemaid
Bridesmaids are getting too big for their boots these days. They should consider it an honor to have been asked and should wear what ever u decide.. Rant over x
I have two bridesmaids I was able to compromise with who both loved the dresses and styles I showed them (my wedding isn't till 2021 but we're starting to look into styles) and one who alot of people have told me 'wants to upstage you the bride, your trying to find a style you like and she's like no no no and wants too revealing dresses and stuff that isn't a friend" (I'm a sucker for things so if I like a specific style that's my style it won't change) but I've left it for now since we couldn't find a style to agree on we'll try again in a couple years time 😂 but I know my colours have wanted the same colours for years (even before I was engaged sad I know 😂) and thank god their all happy with them all I can say is if you can't compromise then let her pick and then tell her you want some things changed about the dress that should work if it doesn't then I don't know 🤷