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UKbride Member Request 13 May 2018

After some help before I go stir crazy regarding our top table. My parents...

After some help before I go stir crazy regarding our top table. My parents are still together so we both want them there and want a traditional top table. However OHs parents are divorced and one remarried. Neither want to sit on the top table if the other is there due to how it makes them feel. Surely it’s not about them and it’s about my OH and us as a couple. Should they be able to put their differences aside for a couple of hours or do we put one of them up at the top table and not force it?? I can’t help but feel they are forgetting who’s day it is..

27 Comments
Lucy Lewis
Lucy Lewis 14 May 2018

Hi your partners Dad should sit with your Mother and his Mum should sit with your Dad on both eds of the table:)

Danika O'Connor
Danika O'Connor 14 May 2018

Separate them, it’s not worth the hassle

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 14 May 2018

I had my mum sat next to my father in law next to my husband, my dad next to my mother in law next to me. My mum's partner sat with my brother

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 14 May 2018

We never had top table for that reason.soo much easier

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 14 May 2018

Could you have them both their at the end of the table. They wont have to look at each other anyway as facing forward and wont be anywhere near each other if a bigish top table.
Plus means your parents who arent making any fuss are closer to you. Thats traditional anyway for fotb speech. X

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 14 May 2018

Both my parents are remarried so we've scrapped the top table and just sitting together instead :)

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 14 May 2018

My parents are separated and my dad has a new partner but my mum and dad was happy to sit next to each other on our top table and my dad's partner on the guests table next to the top table. People should think it's yours and your h2b day and people should be putting there differences aside just for those couple of hours. Good luck x

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 14 May 2018

They *should* put their differences aside, but will they? Tell both the in-laws you want to put them on the top table, (maybe at opsiite ends) if one chooses to be immature/make a fuss/not want to sit there, stick them wherever there is room. You cant indulge that behaviour

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 14 May 2018

This is why I am not having a top table x

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 14 May 2018

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 14 May 2018

They really should sit there for you and your OH, but if that won't work I'd put the one who hasn't remarried on the table, using the reason that who has remarried can then sit with their partner. We've scrapped top table because of similar xx

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 14 May 2018

Look on google they have loads of untraditional top table plans for these types of situations! Anyway it is your day they need to remember that! Xx

Mandy Houston
Mandy Houston 14 May 2018

Tell them to grow up its your day not there's

Samantha James
Samantha James 14 May 2018

My dad didn’t come to my wedding for the same reason. I feel sad that was his choice but for once I wasn’t going to be put in the middle. It was our day (hubby and me) and that was it. It’s not always what you want but forcing the point would have caused more hassle in the long run. Enjoy your day no matter what x

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 15 May 2018

traditionally they dont actually sit next to each other so cant see what the problem is my mum is re married but luckily gets on with my dad and thats because of me and my brother if parents cant get on for one day then i wouldnt even bother inviting them they acting like children and tbh children behave better x

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 15 May 2018

Both of our patents are separated abd both are remarried but they were happy to sit on the top table without their new partners. The new partners all sat on the tables closest to us with grandparents.
You could put your mum and his dad next to each other and same with your dad and his mum so his parents aren't sat next to each other?

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 15 May 2018

They need to get over themselves!!! I'd ban both if they can't put aside for 1 day !!!!!

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 15 May 2018

My parents are divorced - dad remarried, I scrapped the top table they sat with their own siblings and me and my husband ate our food on our own little top table and had time to chat. Defo worth a thought.

Cat Gibson
Cat Gibson 15 May 2018

Put them on each end that's what I'm doing with my ohs parents.. having my mum n dad either side of us n then his on ends

Bryony Hamm
Bryony Hamm 15 May 2018

I just had the bridal party and my nephew on the top table. And parents say on surrounding tables. My parents are divorced and sat on opposite ends of the room.

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 15 May 2018

My husbands parents are separated and in different relationships. On our wedding both his mum and dad sat at the top table out of respect to me and my husband. It was only for the speeches and meal then happily went and sat with their partners.
They should be able to put their differences aside for 1 day

Sonia Overfield
Sonia Overfield 15 May 2018

My in laws are divorced but agreed to sit at the top table together for us and put their differences aside as it’s mine and my hb2 day

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 15 May 2018

We are just having us two as a top table :)

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 15 May 2018

I think it's unfair to expect them to sit together if they don't want that not everyone has a happy marriage/ divorce things happen in relationships that can't be forgiven even for one day to please there children I know my daughter wouldn't get me in the same room as her dad let alone the same table at least they all willing to go

Abbey Lawson
Abbey Lawson 15 May 2018

I was going to put my mum and grandma on the top table.. I would probably put your mum and dad then put whichever parent isn't remarried and a grandparent or best man or something xx

Alanna May
Alanna May 15 May 2018

Do it your way. I am sure the parets can act like adults for a day. Alternatively, do what we are doing and have a sweetheart table :)

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 17 May 2018

It’s your day! They are adults and need to enjoy your day.

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