UKbride Member Request 20 Feb 2018

My partner and I are slightly older with grown up families. I no longer have...

My partner and I are slightly older with grown up families. I no longer have my parents, but my partner's mother and his sister are just not interested in our wedding. They never mention it and havent offered to help with anything - I dont mean financially. I'm wondering do I present my future MIL with flowers during the speeches?

Becky Harris
Becky Harris 21 Feb 2018

We are doing flowers for those that have helped, whether that is financially or with making items as a thank you. Both me and my partner having split parents this means that not all of the women will have flowers because they haven’t helped. Hope this helps but essentially it’s your wedding so you should both do what makes you happy c

Zena Hill
Zena Hill 21 Feb 2018

We’re not doing flowers either. Only gifts for those that actually helped. So moreorless me & h2b. Lol 😂 x

Sharon  Fowles
Sharon Fowles 21 Feb 2018

You could get her a small posey to thank her for raising the man of your dreams.. Just so she can't say you left her out, but i wouldn't go overboard.

Sara Hughes
Sara Hughes 21 Feb 2018

My h2b's side hasn't bothered with our wedding either. We're getting her a small flower box but we're getting my side a few extra gifts. Totally upto you though it's your wedding. I bought her the flower box so it doesn't cause friction in the future xx

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 21 Feb 2018

Well if you’ve got time to swing by a petrol station on your way then sure but I wouldn’t make a special effort for someone who’s not bothered. It doesn’t matter what your age is, weddings are stressful and you need help, they should recognise that.

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 21 Feb 2018

No, if she hasnt helped; no flowers! Flowers are a thank you for supporting whether financially or otherwise. We are giving both our mums flowers because both have helped ...but if they hadn't done anything then we wouldnt.

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 21 Feb 2018

No no no & no

Laura Hall
Laura Hall 21 Feb 2018

We aren't doing flowers or gifts for any one just to save a few pennies.

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 21 Feb 2018

I always thought that gifts for parents at the wedding are not because they were helping you organise the wedding but because they raised your husband to be the man he is today...
Saying that they never mention it and don't offer to help, well have you actually asked for their input?
Seems like whatever people do is never right and you can either be upset because nobody is interested or they are too interested and start to take over...

Susan Coleclough
Susan Coleclough 21 Feb 2018

I agree with Sharon and Paulina. We are in a similar position to you in as much as both Fathers have long passed, my Mother is in a care home and too far gone to even be told about the wedding and the only one to be there will be my future MIL. We would normally have given her flowers for being the groom's Mom (but she is having to fly over and returning straight after the wedding so that isn't appropriate).

Tessa Lok
Tessa Lok 22 Feb 2018

You're supposed to give flowers to the MILs now? =_= these wedding rituals are getting out of hand! Consider giving them a slightly fancier wedding favour (like a single flower ribbon-tied to the favour) if it makes you feel better?

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 22 Feb 2018

I'm doing gifts for people who have helped or are likely to help on the day xx

Kayleigh E Alman
Kayleigh E Alman 23 Feb 2018

My mother in law to be Is the same! Changes the subject every time we mention it so m in the same boat as you!! It’s a horrible feeling isn’t it because I really want her involved x

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 24 Feb 2018

Flowers to mothers of both bride & groom are not new. It's a gift not for help with the wedding in any way but a show of thanks for bringing them up and all that involves. It was a normal thank you 40 years ago when I got married.


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