UK
UKbride Member Request 10 Feb 2018

So my aunt has offered to do my photography. As much as I would appreciate...

So my aunt has offered to do my photography. As much as I would appreciate the pictures she would take I'm really worried about a couple of things 1) is she going to focus more on my side of the family and my h2b side end up in only a few pictures 2) is she going to enjoy it as much as she could. She's pretty incistent and I'm not sure what to do

18 Comments
Lucy Lewis
Lucy Lewis 10 Feb 2018

Hi tell her you appreciate her offer but would rather she just enjoyed the day as your guest :)

Mary Green
Mary Green 11 Feb 2018

If she still doesn’t want to take no for an answer you could do a little white lie and say you’ve won a photography package with another photographer. Not being rude or wanting to lie but a little white lie not to hurt her feelings or yours since you want to feel relaxed knowing your photos will be done the way you want them x

Susan Coleclough
Susan Coleclough 11 Feb 2018

Agree with both Lucy and Mary's comments. You want her to enjoy the day as your guest, you have a photographer from a competition or some other way. You could always tell her you would love her to take lots of photos if she would wish too so that you have them from another angle. Good luck,.

Derryn Coleman
Derryn Coleman 11 Feb 2018

We had this problem with a h2b's friend. Unfortunately you just have to be honest, you only get one chance to get it right and you deserve the perfect photos. Good luck x

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 12 Feb 2018

Is she a professional or semi professional photographer? If she is, Is she offering this as her gift to you? If she knows what she's doing she'll know what photos to take. If she knows what she's doing she'll save you a lot of money. If she's an enthusiastic amateur a wedding is a tricky beast to photograph and your best bet is to say that the offer is fantastic but you'd rather she was there enjoying herself and spending time with the family. If you create a lie to cover up you're making things potentially far more complicated than needed and when she finds out she'll be even more upset. As a compromise you could ask her to cover the later parts of the day, the fun informal stuff, ie the bits after a paid photographer has finished or 'behind the scenes' stuff. Good luck and happy planning x

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 12 Feb 2018

Me bestie is a wedding photographer and I love her work. Her style is so ‘me’. However when it came to my wedding day we both agreed that she wouldn’t do it. Its a full days job , so she wouldn’t have time to enjoy the day if she was working, also the pressure on her to get it just right would be immense and I wouldn’t risk our friendship for anything. Instead she hit her glad rags on and was a guest as she should be and did a wonderful reading. Be honest with your aunt, it’s the only way.

Angela Christie
Angela Christie 12 Feb 2018

ask her to take the informal personal photos, but you want the formal ones done by someone else so she can enjoy the day and be in the family pictures

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 12 Feb 2018

If you can't be honest with her, just say that you want everyone to relax and enjoy the day and it's really important to you. I've told my family and my h2bs family that I really want everyone to sit back and be part of the day without any fussing or worrying
If that fails just say that you have already found and paid for a photographer. That might do it!

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 13 Feb 2018

Most photographers agree a list of what photo groups you want before hand so that would ensure no bias

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 13 Feb 2018

We had 3 family friends who wanted to take photos for us so we hired a professional photographer who didn't have any issues with other people also taking photos. That way we didn't have to say no to them but there was no pressure on them either so they just got to enjoy their hobby and relax. We ended up with over 1000 pictures between them. The photographer's were the best quality but we got some absolutely beautiful moments captured by our friends too

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 13 Feb 2018

My sister done ours. Her gift to us but i still treated her as i would an other photographer... i went through what photos i did and didn't want. She got some beautiful well balanced shots that i love. Xxx

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 13 Feb 2018

We have a professional booked and my uncle taking over after the day bit. As they are expensive so saved us money but ensured we took him up on the offer but told him to enjoy being a guest to

Jodie Cleeves
Jodie Cleeves 13 Feb 2018

Why don't you have both. Get her to be your 'official unofficial photographer' she can take lots of pics whilst you are having the main ones done. Then you can still use a photographer and your aunt gets to feel important for you xx

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 13 Feb 2018

My friend had her cousin, who is a professional photographer, and she said that it’s her 1 regret of the day. She focused more of their family and hardly any of the friends or grooms family. She then stopped after the main reception, and no photos of the evening or fireworks were captured, other than friends who took some shots. I’m planning my wedding at the moment and her advice to me, was don’t take short cuts with the photos.

Samantha Marklew
Samantha Marklew 13 Feb 2018

I’d just say you’re welcome to take some snaps but I’ve booked someone so you can enjoy the day :)

Vittoria Di Franco
Vittoria Di Franco 14 Feb 2018

We have a considerable amount of photographers turning up to our wedding who are friends however it didn't stop us hiring an actual photographer / 2 videographer to do the job as friends are their to enjoy the day and not there to edit the wedding photos after which takes hours and produce creative pieces of work a photographer will orchestrate the day will story tell and know venues to get the best of them and pre shoot to get the best of you it's a art and pretty in depth stuff to know light and subject and adapt equipment for that because weather can reek havoc on wedding photos if a photographer doesn't know what they are doing yes we have paid a lot but then it's one aspect of the day which we prioritised as not be frugal on budget or quality

Emma Raisborough
Emma Raisborough 14 Feb 2018

Its lovely that she wants to help you with your day, but I agree with a lot of the others, you want her to enjoy your day as well. I would just thank her for her kind offer but you would prefer someone else to take the pictures as you want your guests to be able to enjoy the day too.

Nicole Porter
Nicole Porter 14 Feb 2018

We recently went to a wedding where their Aunt did the photography just for the ceremony and then a professional came to do the meal, speeches etc, this seemed to work really well. This was a small ceremony though (20 people). Maybe compromise and provide a list of what photos you want taken.

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