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UKbride Member Request 3 Nov 2017

Hi guys in serious need of advice here.... wedding is all booked and paid...

Hi guys in serious need of advice here.... wedding is all booked and paid for honeymoon all booked and paid for and I've just found out I'm pregnant. The baby is due a little while before the wedding and is no problem in terms of the wedding it's just the honeymoon. We've paid a hell of a lot of money and to add a baby on to that cost isn't doable. Do we cancel? Or do we ask our parents to look after the baby whilst we're away? I'm uncomfortable about the idea of leaving my baby although I know between both sets of grandparents and aunts and uncles the baby would be in very good hands..... help!

44 Comments
Emma Raisborough
Emma Raisborough 3 Nov 2017

Congratulations! I personally think it would be fine to ask your parents if they will look after your baby - I am sure they would love to! I know a lot of new parents are anxious leaving their newborns for the first time but maybe getting this first time over and done with could be a good thing? I am not a mother so could be talking out of ignorance in this situation - I can't give any advise from experience unfortunately. good luck x

Sian Flood
Sian Flood 3 Nov 2017

My mum is looking after ours while we go on honeymoon. Shes actually very excited to get her grandchild all to herself

Susan Coleclough
Susan Coleclough 3 Nov 2017

I can understand your reluctance to leave your baby but remember that your parents brought you up OK so there is no-one better for your baby to be left with. There is always skype or whatsapp too so you don't have to be completely out of touch. Have a wonderful honeymoon.

Lucy Lewis
Lucy Lewis 3 Nov 2017

Hi do you have to pay for babies now I thought under 2's went free :)

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 3 Nov 2017

If i was your mum. Id look after the baby for you.
Ask.her. your honeymoon is us time for you and hubby . You wont have much of that after.

Bethan Roberts
Bethan Roberts 3 Nov 2017

The baby only costs £35 admin on aeroplane and nothing I doubt for the accommodation? Can't you just take the baby. Personally I'd never leave my baby that young, but that decision is one only you can make. X

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 3 Nov 2017

Can you postpone your honeymoon until the following year?

Sadie Dennis
Sadie Dennis 3 Nov 2017

We are due our first In march and have our wedding in October and in between booked a last min week away before the wedding which baby will be 4 months and we are leaving him with the grandparents it’s going to be rough but he will be too young to do all that traveling with in the heat plus parents need to regenerate too! Haha x

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 3 Nov 2017

If you have the support there take it!!!! Enjoy some time with you and hubby. You can FaceTime baba everyday and you will probably find they will be loving life with grandparents

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 3 Nov 2017

Your honeymoon should be our honeymoon. Ino it's scary cause leaving a newborn is scary but baby will be ok with grandparents and baby wouldn't even remember. Plus you have your one last blowout on your honeymoon and have family holidays after. Good luck whatever you decide to do x

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 3 Nov 2017

Congratulations. What makes it not doable to take the baby with you? Personally I couldn't leave my newborn to go away, especially if you are considering breast feeding. I understand how important it is to have us time as it's your honeymoon but if you are going to be fretting about your baby the whole time, will you even relax and enjoy it?

Jade Rees
Jade Rees 3 Nov 2017

Don't even think about not going lol, honestly for 1 your lucky to have family to look after your baby and 2 this could be the only child free holiday you have for at least 18 years.

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 3 Nov 2017

I would talk it over with h2b and both sets of grandparents but if you decide to leave baby don't feel guilty

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 3 Nov 2017

Leave the baby with grandparents he/She will be fine. X

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 3 Nov 2017

I don't know how old baby will be... but if your comfortable leaving him/her and the sitters have no issue go for it.

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 3 Nov 2017

I always thought kids under 2 go free,so why the fuss?

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 3 Nov 2017

Go for it!! it will feel weird to begin with but enjoy, baby will be safe and being spoilt with grandparents and family x

Rachel Dawes
Rachel Dawes 3 Nov 2017

Do what makes you happy. X

Siobhan Knight-Potgieter
Siobhan Knight-Potgieter 3 Nov 2017

The only issue would be if your baby is going to be a newborn and your breastfeeding ( although you can work round the breastfeeding thing )

Otherwise if the family are happy to have a bit of time with your bubba and you want some much needed Relaxation and Rest time then just enjoy ! X

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 3 Nov 2017

I would personally take the baby with us!! I left my baby for one night when she was 2 months old and I couldn't enjoy it, I slept terrible and couldn't wait to get back to her. I've never left her over night again and she's 7 months now. I have no plans on leaving her that long again! Only a little while during the day with Daddy when I go back to work but only because I have to. It felt so unnatural and I couldn't enjoy the time without her.

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 3 Nov 2017

I couldn't have as he was breastfed ...i wouldn't have left mine I don't think x only personal opinion though x

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 3 Nov 2017

I have 3 kids and I have left them with grandparents and they were absolutely fine and happy. But I only went about 2 and half hours away for a weekend. I don't think I could do it any longer and in another country. I would worry about so many things and not being able to get straight back for them if I was needed. But this is just me and in no way am i saying it's bad to leave them if you know that you will be comfortable in doing so.

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 3 Nov 2017

I’m a travel agent - adding an infant should barely add any additional costs on! I know my daughter went to the Caribbean and it was £89 to add her

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 3 Nov 2017

No way I could leave my baby to go abroad, mine are 2 and 4 now and I still wouldn't even entertain the idea, but obviously that's just me and I would never judge someone who would. I'd say wait til bubs is here before you make your decision as until you have had the baby as you really can't predict how you will feel until it is here x

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 3 Nov 2017

I'd cancel and go on a familymoon

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 3 Nov 2017

I wouldn't be able to enjoy myself if I went without my baby. Nothing prepares you for motherhood (only motherhood itself) so you won't know how you feel until baby is here. Best of luck for everything.

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 3 Nov 2017

dont think it would cost much more for a very young baby to take with you

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 3 Nov 2017

Depends on date difference. See what cost would be to postpone a few months so can go without baby still but baby be a bit older xx

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 3 Nov 2017

Unfortunately I think you're the only person who can make the decision, and until he or she is here it's so hard to know how you would feel. I have a 1 and 4 year old and haven't had a night away from them. My friend had planned a night away before her son was born and was planning to live him with her mom, but couldn't do it in the end and ended up taking him with her. Everybody is different! Until you hold your baby you won't 100% know what to do xx

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 3 Nov 2017

I think you might underestimate just how hard it is to leave your baby particularly as your a first time mum. Its very difficult to explain just how attached you become to the little cretins lol its a decision only you can make once the baby is here because you wont know how you feel until then

Charley Kelly
Charley Kelly 3 Nov 2017

This is a tough one. I wouldn’t have left my daughter at a young age, she’s two and I don’t really like leaving her now but have a couple of times. But you also need to consider whether your newborn be okay if you’re going somewhere hot? And all the sterilising, milk if you’re not breastfeeding, nappies, buggy etc. It may be a better option to see if you can move the date of your honeymoon to when your baby is a bit older/you may feel more comfortable leaving baby with grandparents. Whatever you decide will be right for you so good luck! X

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 3 Nov 2017

My mum left me with my grandparents when her and my dad got married, I was totally fine and have a great bond with my Nanna

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 4 Nov 2017

You may feel differently once you have the baby! Our honeymoon was a family break that if I'm honest was mostly for my children, I'm sure we'll have 'our' honeymoon when they're older. We got married to complete our family so wouldn't have had our family honeymoon any other way!

Holly Dewing
Holly Dewing 4 Nov 2017

Congratulations!! I found myself in a similar situation - wedding booked for October 2018, fell pregnant and we are due in March. We toyed with lots of ideas but in the end our families were pretty insistent we deserve a honeymoon. It may be the last holiday you have just the two of you for some years to come, and don't underestimate how glad you may actually be for the break! it is your personal decision but like everyone has said your parents managed ok with you so they will be the best people to look after your little one. We still haven't cemented the decision and booked anything just the two of us as you really don't know until baby is here! But to begin with I thought that was a honeymoon out the window and now I'm seeing there are options so do what is best for you hun xxx

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 4 Nov 2017

It won’t cost hardly anything to add the baby on. If it’s a long haul flight it’s about £60 and your hotel shouldn’t charge you for an infant. Congratulations by the way

Shannon Matthews
Shannon Matthews 4 Nov 2017

I personally would never leave my baby to go on honey moon..my youngest will be nearly 2 when we get married and others will be nearly 5 and nearly 9 but I'll still struggle leaving them.. plus it depends on weather you are planning to breastfeed or not.. but it's your personal choice.. thing is when the time comes you may not actually want to leave your baby !! Even if you have the honey moon booked. So I'd book with the baby and see closer to the time. After all a baby is more important and bigger then a honey moon

Good luck and congratulations to you x

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 4 Nov 2017

Hi hun same thing happened to me. I had my Daughter on the 24th of May and my wedding was the 26th of July. All I did was have the wedding dress made a size up or two then when it came closer to the date I just had it professionally altered after I had the baby. Good luck hun and congratulations x

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 4 Nov 2017

Truth is you won’t really know how comfortable you feel about leaving the baby until the baby is here. Personally I couldn’t.. a weekend maybe but a full holiday potentially a fortnight would be too long for me. You could look at a more family friendly resort/more affordable location? Either way options are always good

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 4 Nov 2017

I get it. My son is 9 months and the longest I have left him is 2 nights for our first wedding anniversary and it was torture. I honeymooned for 3 weeks and it was just the dog at home and I was missing him terribly by the end of the second week.

You have to decide what is right for you but ask yourself how you would feel not seeing and holding your baby for 7/10/14 nights and that will give you your answer.

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 4 Nov 2017

I had something similar last year, I had booked New York for a friends wedding with my sister and ended up having a 4 month old when the time came to go! I did seriously consider not going but in the end everyone convinced me I should and it was the holiday of a life time. It was hard at the time, but it’s definitely made me more relaxed with my boy going forward. I should point out that he did stay home with his daddy not grandparents, but I know they would have loved to have stepped in if needed to & my partner loved having 4 days completely to himself with our son and it helped them bond massively xx

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 4 Nov 2017

Do you have holiday insurance? Maybe through a bank account? It's a life event and may be covered. At least you might then get money back to allow another holiday booked that may be shorter or get the little one with you.

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 4 Nov 2017

Go for the honeymoon! We had a similar situation - baby was due 7 weeks before the wedding and we.found out after it was all booked! We delayed the honeymoon for a year though, she was 15m old when we went away. But my mum had a week with her and my MIL had the 2nd week. They both adored having her to themselves! And we really did need that break! X

UKbride Administrator
UKbride Administrator 4 Nov 2017

Ask
Ur parents I’m
Sure they would love it

Summer James-Byrne
Summer James-Byrne 4 Nov 2017

You only get a honeymoon once. I say leave her with your family. I've just had a baby and I'll be leaving her with my mother and father for my honeymoon. It's a time to celebrate your like as a couple. The baby won't even remember you left them and your family will love all the cuddles.

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