Hi Brides! I have a slight dilemma, I have not yet been wedding dress shopping and I am lucky enough to have 2 people who want to be involved. My Mum wants to be there and my Sister in law. My Sis in law is more than happy for us all to go together, but my Mum just wants it to be the 2 of us. I have tried to explain to Mum that after promising someone to go dress shopping, I can't just suddenly turn her away. Now I don't know what to do as my Mum has said she would feel very uncomfortable with someone else there. I thought about going once on my own, once with Mum and once with sis in law but I don't know how well that would work. Please help!! Thanks in advance x
I would say go with your Mum for the first trip and both of them on your second trip. I can see why this is a special moment for your mum.
Hi I agree with the answer above :)
I think it's a really special time with your mum, I would go first with her and then a seperate occasion with your sister in law 🏵
I understand where your mom is coming from but I wouldn't go with just her first as what will happen to your SIL if you find and buy your dress on the first trip. She would then be upset that you didn't ask her to go.
Who do YOU want there? personally if it was me and I wanted my SIL to be there I would tell my mum that she has to just put up with it because its who I want to be there.
More opinions the better. This is a trip for YOU not your mum. Take them both.
Go with who u want there im only taking my 2 older bridesmaids x
I took my mum to one just us so we could have that special moment. But then took my grandma and mother in law as well to some of the others. That way at least she’s had that one time with you x
I just went with my mum, and then with my mum and dad, unless you are particularly close to your sister in law I'd just stick with Mum 🙂
Its ur day and u need to do want u want. I had my mum. Maid of honour. Mum in law and step mum. I just asked them all to come. Then told my mum ive invited them as want them all 2 be involved. Then ive just taken my mum to all my dress fittings. My final one being 2day. Good luck xx
I took my mum and 4 bridesmaids with me!! It’s up to you who you take x
My mam and I went dress shopping together until I found to dress and then I invited my bridesmaids along when went to make my final decision and order it. It is your decision but I know how hard it is trying not to upset everyone.
I went dress shopping with my sister in law and when I thought I'd found the one I told my mom and my mom and step dad came with me but when they came I found a different dress that I likes better x
Your going to need more than one opinion just stand up to Your Mum it’s your experience not hers
It's your decision, and your right you can't turn your sister in law away now, it's nice your sis in law wants to be involved
I'd say have them both there it's for you not your mum, you'd want a few opinions on the dress you're wearing anyway!
Do you mom and SIL get on normally? If so then it's likely that this is a big deal for your momma and the most tactful thing might be to explain this to your SIL. Even if you find THE dress first time (I did but I was hoping to because I wasn't really 'into ' dress shopping ) you can reserve it and go back with both of them to buy it.
Don't really understand what your mums problem is, and I think it's extremely unfair of her to try and guilt you into just taking her.
It's YOUR moment, you should be able to spend it with whoever you want.
Its your choice and your mum should understand that as if your day! Everything to do with it is up to you.
I had my mum and then 2 of my bridesmaids (best friends) with me n i found my dress first place. Xx
I am MOB and I thought it was good to have other opinions so that my daughter could look as beautiful as poss due to distance we had a different bridesmaid each time however after 4 outings it was just me and my daughter and we got THE dress!
First trip is to find the dress go with mom. Then fitting when alternations have to be made go with sil have two girlie days out make it special for both of them and you. Explain to sil need a mom day one to one. Gutted she will understand.
Wow. I hope those of you who are all about "it's your day, it's all about you, your mum will just have to get on with it" will be just as understanding when it's your turn to be mum with your daughter getting married. Your mum is there for you your whole life. She's the one who's had your back, picked up the pieces and brought you up. It would be nice to give her just a single day of dress shopping , Just the 2 of you before inviting every one else.
It's nice to have more than one opinion.I took my mum,step mum and my sister.xx
My mum asked it to just me her and my nan. She said she only has one daughter and this is her one time she gets to do this - it’s a big deal for the mums aswell, not just for the brides! I would maybe bring your mum to finding the dress, then once found maybe bring your sister in law back to show her the dress?
As a MOB now MIL, I can understand your Mums disappointment, my daughter & I had talked about it being just us dress shopping but for various reasons ended up with a plus one....I found it actually helped to have some one there different age group & opinions. We did loads of other bits just us, my dress shopping, her jewellry etc., Good luck & enjoy xx
Go with who YOU want there. Weddings bring out the worst in families. If you don't stand your ground now, you could be asking for more trouble further into planning
I chose a dress with my mum then got my maid of honour to come see it for her opinion after x
Have who YOU want there. It is YOUR day and choice not your mums. Bar one fitting I had my mum and bridesmaids with me for dress finding and they were all there the day I found the one. I wouldn't have wanted it any other way. X
Its what ever makes you comfortable that matters its not your mum trying on the dresses its you. Im glad i had my sis in law there in the end she chose 'the one' i wasnt even going to try it and in the end i loved it
I didnt take noone dress shopping. My choice. So peaceful. Istantly found and knew it was my dress. Just do what you feel you want. Your wedding and your experiences so you have the choice. Tell your mum and sil and they will have to be accepting of your choice who you want to take dress shopping
First time I went dress shopping i had my mum; step mum and sister with me second time I had one of my bridesmaids, mum and soon to be mother in law, it's all about you so don't let anyone tell you who you can and can't take it think it's good to get more than one opinion xxx
Its your choice. I had my mum and sister. Explain to your sister in law its a special.day for your mum and you and arrange another day with her after.
I had a very similar dilemma my mum wanted it to be just the two of us and I wanted my MIL and SIL to be there too. I offered a compromise by offering to go with my mum on her own if she would come with them too, it didn't end very well for us but at least if you offer some kind of compromise you know you've been reasonable. You could also offer to do something else by yourselves like flowers/cake. Remember that it is you and your h2b day and not anyone else's so you are entitled to make the final decisions, nothing should matter other than you and your h2b are happy and enjoy your day. Other people should respect that!
I went with my mum twice then took my nan the third time when I actually found the dress x
Surely this is about you choosing your dress and not your mum choosing it!! I would be telling her that you are old enough to decide who you want there and that she is the one who you will ultimately listen to, and that your not pushing her out but that you want someone else's input xx
Tell your mum to grow up and not be selfish.
I dont understand why your mum would feel uncomfortable. Maybe for the easy ness of it go on Different times with the pair of them. Just remember this is your Wedding so do what you want xx
Go a few times but have your Mam there when you go back to choose the one x
Go with both ! Don't just do it to please your mum trust me if you give her leeway on this she'll expect it for a lot more too. X
I wish I had the opportunity to share that special moment with just my mum, it's going to break my heart standing there in my dress and not having my mum there to share those feeling with. You only get one mum, she deserves to be the first to see you in your dress x
I'm havibg just my mum on the dress shopping but taking the entire party to first fitting and ti get the accessories like the veil jewellery shoes etc.... Explain to your SIL how you didn't realise how important it was to your mum and ask her if she will come accessories shopping instead
Me and my Mam always had conversations about when I would get married and shopping for THE dress etc. She would get so excited thinking of us both picking out a dress. I would never imagine going with anyone other than her. It's such a special time and you're her baby girl. Sadly, I don't have my Mam now. We won't get to do all of those special things together so my advice would be to share those first special memories with your mother and then maybe take your SIL to the first fitting where she'll get a chance to see you in your perfect dress. She brought you into the world and brought you up to be the woman your fiancé fell in love with so give her the credit she's due and let her have her day with her daughter ️ have a lovely wedding x
I took eight people with me as didn't want anyone to feel left out but just my mom came with me to my first fitting which was really special so you could try that? X
I went with my mum and my sister to look then my mum to make final decision on the same day as I tried lots on but feel in love with my fist dress xx
Choosing your dress is a very special part of your wedding and who better to share that special time with than your mum. Talk to her and explain your reasons for wanting your sister in law with you and what it means to you for them both to share that time with you. If that don't work explain to your sister in law your mums feelings and include her in buying shoes head dress flowers etc so she is not feeling unwanted. I have just got married myself and trying to please everyone is hard but remember it's your day good luck Hun xx
Why are families such numpties? It's only shopping for a dress. It's up to you who you take, if your mums going to throw her toys out of the pram, tell her to shove off.