Wedding gift lists, Yay or Nay? I used to think that gift lists were...

If there are things you want I think they are a great idea, however a bit pointless if you don't really need anything. We've lived together for years so will be asking for John Lewis vouchers or money towards the honeymoon.

I think they are useful. She. I've go be to weddings it is nice to know what to get.

Hi we haven't thought about a gift list :)

We've gone for a honeymoon gift list as we don't need anything, we were of the same opinion that it was cheeky at first but we heard from a lot of people that guests would prefer to know what to get you (as most guests will want to give something) so I dont think people take offense to it, many would just find it useful.

Think they're rude, not just cheeky.

We said gifts aren’t compulsory, a card is appreciated but if they wanted to get us anything at all then a little something towards our honeymoon would be amazing. That’s what most did, we were able to do so many things while we were away that we wouldn’t have got to do if other people hadn’t given us that contribution.

When everyone asked me I said just them coming as it costs alot to come as an invitee. I know the people hosting the day spend the majority of the money BUT it's nice to remember some people who come may have had bad news or lost working hours or have an unexpected new arrival or anything. Personally I'd sooner have the people I've invited than just the people that can afford something off a gift list. Also I get married Saturday and I am still being asked that / having people confused at my train of thought.

We are using prezola. We already have 2 kids so the whole new house stuff thing doesn't really work for us but they work with red letter days so we are asking for days out. Something we need much more haha

We've not asked for anything. Like people have said, if you live together already it's pointless. I also think it's rude to ask people for money/vouchers so we never stated anything in our invites. When people have asked we have explained that we don't expect anything, but we know people will want to give something but we're leaving it to their discretion.

In my opinion I think if the guests don't have an idea what to buy you, you may indeed gets lots of photo frames. It's very difficult to know what to get a couple if you don't have a list or an idea what to get the couple. However, if you have everything it may be an idea to ask for gift vouchers or money towards honeymoon. And no no gift list or gift idea from the couple does not mean in my opinion you don't need to get them one as suggested in a post in another group, it just screams meanness.

I think they're fine. I'd always take a gift when I go to a wedding and would rather give the couple something that they really want, whether that's money, vouchers, honeymoon list or gift list, rather than wasting my time and money buying something they don't want. I think as long as it's expressed that gifts aren't expected and all you want is for them to attend your wedding, and the list is just there for guidance IF people want to give a gift, then I see no problem. Also, you'd need to make sure that there are a range of differently priced items on there, so that if guests choose to buy a gift then they aren't being forced to spend more than they want to or can afford. What really does bug me is when the couple don't say thank you, particularly when you've got something from a gift list as you wonder if it got lost in the post or something x

We will have a gift list but will only give it to people who ask for it :)

We said on the invites 'if you would like to give a gift' and then linked to a John Lewis list. We also included vouchers, and I made sure there were some small cheap items on the list, as I knew there were guests who weren't that well off but who would want to get us something. I don't think they're rude or cheeky as a lot of people expect there to be one. We did have some people get us something not on the list as they had particular things in mind, and that was fine too. The main thing was we didn't end up with 100 toast racks or tea towels.

Yes, very helpful. We found especially as we were moving into an unfurnished home it was great to have some help towards that.
We used www.marriagegiftlist.com which is great because you aren't tied down to one store, you can just add links from any online store, as well as gift cards for shops (e.g. Ikea!!). Just put a wide price-range on there so people can get something they can afford, and have the opportunity to splash out on you if they so desire.

At the end of the day, if people don't want to get you a gift, that's their decision. But why not give them the opportunity? You never know, some people might surprise you!!

We've signed up with trailfinders for our honeymoon booking. We will add a code to our invites for people to use. It's not compulsory, we won't know how much has been donated by a person and we'll just pay the rest off. I'm quite happy that if people want, they can help me and h2b have the most amazing honeymoon. And if they want to give cash instead or nothing at all, it makes no difference to us! (Because we'll be married and on honeymoon having an adventure!)

If you don't do a list you'll probably end up with things you don't need, or duplicate gifts

We decided as we arent getting married locallt and people will have to travel or stay in hotels that they have alreadg given a gift by doing all that for us. We also live together so dont have anything else we would need or want. Its also the relationship you have with those people x

I think gift lists are expected for weddings, although a little old fashioned now as a lot of couples live together before they get married. We don't expect anything off anyone, however we put a little poem in our invites, saying if you'd like to give something, something towards our honeymoon would be much appreciated. Xx

I used to hate them with a passion but now I'm delighted when I see one in a wedding invitation. It means you can buy the happy couple a gift they really need and also they tend to have lived together for a while so will have lots of things anyways, there's only so many glasses you can use after all.

We had a gift list for our wedding as guests kept asking for idea on what we wanted, we were happy to just have people come but I personally think they're a great idea, with a range of items at realistic prices of things you actually want/Need, id rather provide something the couple will use than something they already have which will go to waste

We didn't ask for anything and I have a zillion mr and mrs frames , think I will just register then at other weddings is that bad? 🤔

I find a list useful, and I'm very happy if people just ask for money as it's so easy to just pop some cash in a card. Please dispense with the twee poems though

It's a good idea to have one, otherwise guests won't know what to give you & you will get asked about it endlessly if you don't put anything on invite about gifts. We mainly asked for money towards honeymoon as we have a house together but we said that there was absolutely no obligation to give us anything (the pleasure of your company is gift enough) & just made a small list on Amazon with a range of different prices (some people don't like to give money). It worked very well for us - mostly received money but got some nice things as well and just the right amount of photo frames! People expect to give gifts for weddings and I would not be offended seeing a wedding list, I would be glad to have it. Hope that helps & you have a wonderful day

We are booking our honeymoon and the ravel company are setting us up a honeymoon log on. Means our guests can log on and gift us towards something we really want x

Make one and everyone will ignore it anyway and still get a million frames and glasses lol

DEBHANAMS do a wedding gift service. You can go in and let them know what you want and let guests know the store has list which tbey can chose from

When I'm invited to a wedding I would prefer to know what the couple would like rather than getting them something they don't need/want. We are putting in a poem card in our invitations to say we'd prefer a cash gift if people want to give us anything. We've already lived together for years so don't need anything x

We're doing one but we have put an information pack together and used the words "If you would like to buy us a gift, we have included information about our gift list.."

We've gone with contributions to our honeymoon as our gift list. My H2B & I have lived together for a few years & honestly couldn't think of anything else we needed for the house. This way, no matter how big or small the contribution, everybody will get to make our honeymoon special by paying for/ towards activities we'd like to do e.g. a romantic dinner on the beach. There's tons of other options out there now...check the internet.

We had one very few people used it and gave us money instead.

As we've been together 8 years we already have everything we need so we'll be saying that if people want to give us something please give B&Q or Homebase vouchers for us to spend on our home as and when we need them x

We had also lived together before we got married however a lot of our stuff was old, and also it was things we both contributed. We moved house 6 months before our wedding into an old cottage which none of our stuff went with so we had a John Lewis gift list as people were asking what we were doing. We got everything we wanted and more and we used vouchers we got to get things that weren't bought off the list. I don't understand why people are saying it's rude??? I also think it's more rude when someone buys you a present you don't want and you don't use it anyway!!

People have give us money for our wedding so would expect anything x

Personally I hate lists or even asking for money etc. Its the whole expect to be given money for your honeymoon or gifts that grates on me. Are we really so entitled now? Just because you are getting married doesnt suddenly mean you will be given stuff. If you want a honeymoon then pay for it yourself. You will likely be given gifts and its even more likely to be money these days but to expect it is the issue I have. As for the "I dont want a million photo frames" Well then give the things you get and dont want to charity, in my eyes it is an extremely ungrateful way to behave to whine about what you are given. Gifts are meant to be a surprise, that is the whole point of a gift You might as well buy it yourself if you want something specific. Gifts were originally given at weddings because husband and wife would be moving in together for the first time and it was things to help them with a start in life, not to send them off on some expensive showy honeymoon. Sorry but it is the same question every other day on here now, just be happy people turn up to your wedding and if you get three kettles then you will always have a spare!!!!

Weddingshop.com is pretty good, that's where we've got ours. People can contribute towards specific funds (honeymoon, house renovations, bed sofa etc) AND/OR buy a specific gift you put on your list that can be from that website or any other. Really handy as you give people a mix of options, price ranges and get what you actually want. Plus once it's been bought it gets taken off the list.

We just went to a wedding and they made one on John Lewis and included directions on how to buy it on the invitation. Saves getting things that won't be used.

They’re just plain and utter rude in my opinion!

We have said we don't want anything. We have lived together for years so already have everything we want. People have said we will give you money but I've said no. Weddings are expensive enough as if is for the guests with taxis and new outfits etc so all we want if for people to turn up and enjoy them self without the extra stress of more money xx

We will be doing one to make sure we dont get loads of 1 thing. Just make sure you have a number of lower item things x