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Wedding Forum - Bridesmaid drama...

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  1.  
    • CattyS55
      CommentAuthorCattyS55
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    Hi,

    I got married in March and it was a great day, but unfortunately there were some issues on the day. I had 4 Bridesmaids, 2 were my sisters and 2 were my friends of 20 years. On the day of the wedding one of my freind's decided to ignore me and brought a lot of negativity to the wedding morning. I didn't let her get to me as it was a special day. In the end everyone was feeling uncomfortable and my mum had to speak to her and then she made an effort. Before I walked down the aisle she spoke with me and said I had been abrupt with her, which I was shocked about and asked for an example and she couldn't give me any. I then explained some issues regarding her behaviour and gave examples and she remained quiet. During the wedding day she didn't help fix my dress, help me go toilet (it was my other friend who helped with this) and all she cared about was the gift I got her.

    We had a brief falling out in the summer but we made up and I've been there for her during difficult times and supported her.

    Since the wedding I've taken a step back and avoided contacting her as I cannot believe her behaviour at my wedding and that all she cared about was the gift. She ended up leaving the gift in my hotel room and kept harassing me to get it back. Again I was shocked as I had just gotten married and that's all she wanted to discuss.

    I just wanted to ask how to handle this situation as I don't think I want anything to do with her. My other bridesmaid is also her best friend so I don't talk to her about this as it's not fair.
  2.  
    • Emily17
      CommentAuthorEmily17
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    Hi Catty, I think its best to meet up with her to give the gift back and discuss it with her then saying you feel very unsupported throughout your wedding and since upset that her priority was a gift that she left behind and not your friendship.

    I think talking to her is your only option.

    Members signature icon
    Met in 2009
    He proposed Jan 2014
    Will become Mrs P 7th October 2017
  3.  
    • CattyS55
      CommentAuthorCattyS55
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    Hi Emily,

    Thanks for your advice. The only problem is she's the sort of person to turn everything into me irrespective of it being my wedding day or not. The fact that she told me I was abrupt to her when I wasn't is a prime example. It's just sad that I had this situation during my wedding day
  4.  
    • Emily17
      CommentAuthorEmily17
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    Do you want to still be friends?

    Members signature icon
    Met in 2009
    He proposed Jan 2014
    Will become Mrs P 7th October 2017
  5.  
    • CattyS55
      CommentAuthorCattyS55
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    If I'm honest I don't think I do... she was there for me in the past as I have been there for her. But when I really needed her (I was really ill last year) I didn't even hear from her and after all the drama with the wedding she causes more drama than helped. I asked for help from her with wedding stuff and didn't get any help and when I highlighted this she said she would help and still didn't. It got to the point where she knew nothing about my wedding. I just think overall she's not a nice person and I tolerated a lot and wasn't willing to face up to it. But the wedding was an eye opener
  6.  
    • Emily17
      CommentAuthorEmily17
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    I would just walk away then and not worry about it. Don't try to contact her but still try to keep contact with the other friend who you still want to remain friends with,

    Members signature icon
    Met in 2009
    He proposed Jan 2014
    Will become Mrs P 7th October 2017
  7.  
    • Lesley0401
      CommentAuthorLesley0401
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    I agree with Emily, I have a friend where I am thinking whether I want to keep trying, we have drifted apart and it sounds like the two of you have too.

    It is a shame but you don't want her making you miserable. x

    Members signature icon
    The future Mrs Perry


 

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