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Wedding Forum - Dress data protection... am I overreacting?...

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  1.  
    • SarahH923
      CommentAuthorSarahH923
     
    Hello,

    Feel I need to get this off my chest with other brides-to-be who might understand my situation. My fiance and non-married friends don't seem to understand why I'm upset.

    After several unsuccessful bridal shop visits with a friend (also getting married), I felt I needed a trip alone without the thoughts of others clouding things. So I set off to a shop and decided not to tell my friend to save any upset. Happily, I found my dress and made an appointment to return with my parents to purchase it. I decided to not tell anyone. In the meantime, the friend made an appointment at the same store. There she mentioned that she had a friend who was getting married and the lady in the shop took out the diary, eventually found my name and then proceeded to hand over details of my appointment. This caused me considerable stress as I then had to explain to my friend why I hadn't told her about the appointment or invited her along. But it gets worse...
    The lady in the shop also handed over details of all the dresses I'd tried on and actually pulled out 'the' dress I picked to show her what I'd decided on.
    I've been so upset by this that I decided to not return and instead purchase the dress from elsewhere, however the women then called my friend to confirm something from her appointment and continued to discuss me even more. This time she told her the name and designer of my dress and further details about what I had liked and not liked.
    I am in complete shock that anyone would hand out personal information and private details of your wedding dress to anyone who says they know you, let alone an actual bridal shop that should know how important this is for a bride. I had wanted my dress to be a surprise and now everyone knows about it.
    What's more is that it might not have even been a friend she was handing over these details to. It could've been anyone.
    Am I so wrong in thinking the details you give bridal shops is treated private and confidentially? Surely this is in breach of data protection.
  2.  
    • LauraH813
      CommentAuthorLauraH813
     
    Wow! I am in shock that she would reveal the details of your appt to anyone. That's outrageous. I would certainly do as you say and find another store that is worthy of your money. If it was me I would have to go in and speak to this woman and explain to her that she had no right to discuss you with a third party without your prior permission. Let her know how upset you are she spoilt your surprise. Because of this she's lost a sale. If you're not good at confrontation ask a family member, maybe your Dad, to go in on your behalf. She really needs to be made aware of what she's done. At the end of the day it's bad practice at the very least and possibly a breach of data protection. Worth checking out.
  3.  
    • Emmilou82
      CommentAuthorEmmilou82
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
      edited
     
    I too would be upset and to be honest fuming!!

    At the end of the day, that is personal information she is handing over and has absolutely no right whatsoever!!

    I would go in and make a complaint.....

    Good luck xx

    Members signature icon
    Marrying 'The One' on 30th July 2016
    I am now Mrs Emma Stokoe xx

  4.  
    • StephH96
      CommentAuthorStephH96
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    Sarah, how the shop lady acted was unacceptable. How did she know that your friend was your friend? And even if she did, you did not want your details being passed out. It would be different if your friend happened to see your name in the appointment book but it seems as if it was pretty much unprompted.

    Just make sure that you can get your dress elsewhere, than cancel your appointment and make a complaint.


    On another topic how is your friend with you, was she ok that you hadn't asked her to the appointment?
  5.  
    • FayeH
      CommentAuthorFayeH
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    Go in and speak to them. I don't know whether it's in breach of data protection laws as they apply to personal data, but at the very least it's highly unprofessional. They might have just thought they were being helpful but I'd let them know so they understand what a mistake they've made.
  6.  
    • StephanieM158
      CommentAuthorStephanieM158
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    I agree with Faye, they have probably assumed they where being helpful as you where friends and probably wouldnt have mind.
    That being said however that was highly unprofessional, whos to say your OH hadnt walked in and got the same info?
    Just be the better person, be kind and tell them that you're unhappy with the service they have provided and if you still feel sore tell them you'll be taking your business elsewhere.

    Members signature icon
    Met 2004
    Engaged 2014
    Getting Married 2016
  7.  
    • CommentAuthorNicolaB7220
      BadgeBadge
     
    I would also be very annoyed and would make a complaint to the shop. She needs to know that what she did is not acceptable.
  8.  
    • Mrs Jones
      CommentAuthorMrs Jones
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    Whoa - that is really bad. Definitely make a complaint. She may have done it with the best intention if your friend then didn't want to choose the same dress, but keeping the dress as a surprise is one of the big parts of the day. I probably wouldn't want to purchase that dress from anywhere now and start again. Let us know how you get on.

    Members signature icon
    First Date 26 April 2014
    Proposed 27 June 2015
    Happily Married 18 June 2016
  9.  
    • Ellie95
      CommentAuthorEllie95
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    I agree with you, I'd be angry and upset too, I've only been taking my mum, nan & auntie to trying on dresses, I don't even tell my MIL about them, so I can understand why you're so annoyed by it, I'd definitely put in a complaint, do you think your friend was getting all the details so she can get the same dress to have one over on your for not inviting her, or do you think she wouldn't do that? :/

    Members signature icon
    Met May 2013
    Engaged December 2015
    Getting Married 22nd June 2018! <3
  10.  
    • clairenina
      CommentAuthorclairenina
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    I would be livid, and would consider reporting them to the ICO
  11.  
    • FayeH
      CommentAuthorFayeH
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    Let us know how you get on if you decide to complain!
  12.  
    • LeanneR0186
      CommentAuthorLeanneR0186
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    I would be really upset if this was me, I would most def complain. If she owns the store I would be going in to see her to explain what she did was unacceptable. If she is an employee I would be most def be asking for the manager. xx

    Members signature icon
    The Richardson's 31/12/16


  13.  
    • MichelleC961
      CommentAuthorMichelleC961
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    No way, this is way out of order, she has no right what so ever and you are right this is in breach of DPA- I woukd not buy my dress from there and confront the owner too as to why she thinks it's acceptable to give his information- I woukd also question why this said friend is even asking this information too? Seems a bit odd to me

    Members signature icon



  14.  
    • Elinor Claire
      CommentAuthorElinor Claire
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    I'd be upset too, she shouldn't be giving out information about any customer without their permission. I would definitely complain, and maybe name and shame on social media.

    Members signature icon
    30th August 2014 was the best birthday ever.
    It was the day that I became Mrs. Dixon.

  15.  
    • Duostar
      CommentAuthorDuostar
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    I would be fuming! Just told my h2b about this and he totally gets why you'd be upset. I would definitely complain about this if I were you. I work in customer services and have to deal with data protection everyday. If I did this and was investigated, I'd be fined £1000! That's me personally, not the company I work for.

    Met in 2005
    Started dating August 2014 (yes it took us that long)
    Engaged April 2016
  16.  
    • MrsBU2B
      CommentAuthorMrsBU2B
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    I agree with Clairenina in that you should contact the ICO as I'm fairly certain that even giving out someone's name is in breach of the data protection act. However before doing that talk to the shop manager etc and see if you can settle this. It has obviously caused you some great distress but don't go overboard with reacting badly towards the shop. If you do talk to them you may even be able to get a discount (hefty I would hope) from them for your dream dress, and if they don't offer you that, take your business elsewhere and try and make the most of it.

    You never know, you might find a better dress that you love even more from another shop and you would have never found it if not for this.
  17.  
    • LeanneM842
      CommentAuthorLeanneM842
     
    not a data protection issue as its not really 'data' and your not a customer as you didnt purchase anything however its deffinatly stupid and unproffesional of them

    Im a bit cruel so I would make them sweat it out, phone them up and tell them you have an 'ex' best friend/bridesmaid who is stalking you and trying to ruin the wedding, that she somehow found out private details from their shop and that your planning on involving the police as its getting out of control (warning: do not actually bother the police with this) just to see how the shop react - it might shock them into not being so stupid again

    it may not be what is actually happening to you but unfortunatly it DOES happen, theres been 2 women on another forum that have had this issue and did have to get restraining orders so 'proffesional suppliers' should be smarter than just handing out infomation to unapproved people even if its not 'set in stone' yet
  18.  
    • JennK
      CommentAuthorJennK
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    Unfortunately it does happen. My MIL went into the dress shop and asked to see my two final options I was choosing between and they showed her. She come across as a harmless little old lady but actually she's quite smart.
    I was fuming at the time but what could I do?

    Members signature icon
    Our perfect day - 08.08.15 <3


  19.  
    • LeanneR0186
      CommentAuthorLeanneR0186
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    Jenn that is ridiculous, why would she do that? x

    Members signature icon
    The Richardson's 31/12/16


  20.  
    • Myranny
      CommentAuthorMyranny
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    Definitely not over-reacting, that's ridiculous!! A lot of brides want to keep their dress a secret for the day, I know I do. I haven't shown anyone except my best man and my parents have seen it because they were there!

    I think I'm a bit cruel too because I think what Leanne has said is a good idea!!! Make them sweat and put them in an awkward position, if you're inclined to do so. At the very least though you need to make a complaint. I've been to bridal shops and discussed friends as well, but they've been VERY careful about what they say. I would also wonder whether this was completely unprompted or whether your friend was asking very specific questions like what dresses you'd looked at and which one did you decide on. It may simply be as innocent as your friend not wanting to try on the same dress as you so as not to pick it, but the shop is still VERY in the wrong.

    It's not a breach of the Data Protection Act though. I imagine your friend probably said your name and then the dresses and details of your appointment were discussed. That type of thing, while stupid and unprofessional, isn't a breach. xx
  21.  
    • AnikaM60
      CommentAuthorAnikaM60
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    I would be furious. I can't believe a bridal shop employee would do this. I would definitely have complained to her manager. The person coming in could have been anyone. Even though it did turn out to be a friend this is still upsetting. I want my dress to be a complete secret from everyone. The only person who's seen it is my mom and I'm hoping to keep it that way. So sorry this has happened to you.

    I agree with Leanne it's a funny way to teach them a bit of a lesson for being so unprofessional and careless.
  22.  
    • DanielleG93
      CommentAuthorDanielleG93
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    i agree with leanne too teach them a lesson

    that is awful, i would be livid and would make a complaint too

    Members signature icon
    Mrs Barlow to-be
    2nd September 2017

 

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