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  1.  
    • leasa
      CommentAuthorleasa
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    A few of us in the 2015 thread have had guests wanting to wear white to our weddings, so I though it would be interesting/fun to see what the general thoughts of everyone is:

    My mother in law is a Greek Cypriot and was initially planning to wear a white skirt and jacket suit to our wedding, it took lots of gentle explaining to her by my (now) husband to convince her that to a British bride, this was extremely rude, and seen as disrespectful.

    She said she had never heard such nonsense! And that in Greece/Cyprus it is normal for others to wear white as well.


    How would you feel if a guest (especially a female guest) wanted to wear an all white outfit to your wedding?


    Forum Poll

    Guests wearing white?

    How would you feel if a guest wore an all white outfit to your wedding?

    Poll Results

    Total Votes:
    37
    I'd be upset, it's disrespectful.
    35% 
    I'd be angry, it's rude.
    27% 
    I couldn't care less.
    32% 
    Something else, please explain in the comments.
    5% 


    Members signature icon
    Met 30th May 2005
    Proposed in Monte Carlo August 25th 2013
    Became Mrs K on 30th May 2015
    Married my Gorgeous Greek God
  2.  
    • Flossie
      CommentAuthorFlossie
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      edited
     
    I said I would be angry but I would also be upset as well I reckon. I've seen it happening a lot more these days and just can't get my head around it... maybe it is becoming more acceptable but I'm quite traditional in the sense I don't think anyone should wear white/cream/ivory apart from the bride. If I was a guest I would not even consider turning up in white!!

    Members signature icon
    Happily married
    18th June 2016
    xx
  3.  
    • MrsEmmaP
      CommentAuthorMrsEmmaP
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    I agree with Flossie. I would be angry and upset, I don't think anybody except the bride should wear white, even if it becomes more acceptable I don't think I'd ever be happy with it and people shouldn't even consider wearing it x

    Members signature icon
    Got together on 14th March 2010
    Got engaged on 25th December 2013
    Became Mrs P on 14th May 2016 - best day ever!
  4.  
    • Emily17
      CommentAuthorEmily17
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    I put both angry and upset as the others I don't see how anyone could think that its appropriate. It would make me feel like they are trying to take the focus away from us and make the day about them.

    Is 100 times worse if its a long white dress

    Members signature icon
    Met in 2009
    He proposed Jan 2014
    Will become Mrs P 7th October 2017
  5.  
    • leasa
      CommentAuthorleasa
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    I was angry and upset too! Luckily she didn't do it though, she's lovely to have as a mother in law, and eventually accepted that I'd been brought up to view it this way. It also helped that she mentioned it to her friends at bingo, and she told me they were horrified at the thought as well.

    Members signature icon
    Met 30th May 2005
    Proposed in Monte Carlo August 25th 2013
    Became Mrs K on 30th May 2015
    Married my Gorgeous Greek God
  6.  
    • DonnaH39
      CommentAuthorDonnaH39
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    I think after all the trouble we have had coming up to the wedding, I would not care on the day. But looking back on pictures I would think ''why would you wear that''

    I personally would never dream of wearing white to someone else's wedding. I would also judge someone else who did to be honest. But like I say, I think on the day other guests would notice more then what you would... not that it makes it right.




  7.  
    • CommentAuthorMrsRobson2Be
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    I voted for the angry & upset, I don't get why anyone would think it's ok to wear a plain white dress to a wedding unless they were the bride!!
    I have had 2 guests ask if I minded if they wore a white dress, surely if you need to ask its because you are aware it is wrong.
  8.  
    • Emmilou82
      CommentAuthorEmmilou82
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      edited
     
    Ill be completely honest and probably on my own on this but if a guest turns up in white, i wouldnt be bothered!!! At the end of the day, they would only make themselves look daft. Im the bride and will stand out far more than them..... Things like that dont bother me though. personally, I wouldnt do it but not everyone thinks the same way

    Members signature icon
    Marrying 'The One' on 30th July 2016
    I am now Mrs Emma Stokoe xx

  9.  
    • Flossie
      CommentAuthorFlossie
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    I wouldn't be worried about anyone "upstaging" me or anything, I know as the bride you're going to stand out anyway and all attention will be on you etc... I just genuinely think it's rude xx

    Members signature icon
    Happily married
    18th June 2016
    xx
  10.  
    • KayleighS46
      CommentAuthorKayleighS46
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    I personally wouldn't wear white/cream/ivory at anyone else's wedding and I would expect the same back. Mine would probably be more for their benefit though - imagine all the stares that person would get from everyone else at the wedding who disagrees with it - my MIL originally said she was going to wear a full cream suit to the wedding, I think my 'look' gave it away though and simply said you can wear whatever you like.... as long as it isn't white/cream or ivory! She now has a lovely black dress with cream detail and a short black suit jacket thing :o) xx

    Met 2013
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    Will Be Mrs Brookes 2016
    always & forever xxx
  11.  
    • CatherineR
      CommentAuthorCatherineR
      Is poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadge
     
    I agree with Flossie - I wouldn't be worried about someone upstaging me but I just think it's generally rude and disrespectful, it's not something you do and totally against wedding etiquette! I had to explain several times to my cousin that she can't wear a white dress with a train, that did get me angry!

    Members signature icon
    Married my wife on 15.08.15
    Honeymooned on the Isles of Scilly :)

  12.  
    • leasa
      CommentAuthorleasa
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    Catherine, I love your use of the word "etiquette"

    So rarely used and often forgotten. ( the practice of etiquette, not the word) It would seem even in "today's society" where there's an anything goes/your day your rules attitude, there's still a traditionalist in all of us somewhere.

    Members signature icon
    Met 30th May 2005
    Proposed in Monte Carlo August 25th 2013
    Became Mrs K on 30th May 2015
    Married my Gorgeous Greek God
  13.  
    • Sam G 2b May 2016
      CommentAuthorSam G 2b May 2016
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    I've never really thought about to be honest. I don't think I'd care too much if it wasn't somebody in the wedding party, but a mother or mother in law then I would be annoyed. As a guest I wore a cream dress to my auntie's wedding a few years ago but with coloured accessories, I really don't think anyone paid any attention.
  14.  
    • Emmilou82
      CommentAuthorEmmilou82
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    OK.... So maybe my wording was wrong, 'Im the bride and will stand out far more than them' - I dont actually mean 'Upstaging' more you dont want guests looking bridal....... I agree to not wearing a white dress with a train (very bridal) however if it was a white bodycon style dress, i personally dont see a problem....... As i say, each to their own opinion.

    Personally, i dont think black should be worn for a wedding but many people do......

    Members signature icon
    Marrying 'The One' on 30th July 2016
    I am now Mrs Emma Stokoe xx

  15.  
    • CommentAuthorMrsRobson2Be
      BadgeBadge
     
    I have been to a few weddings were guests have turned up in a plain white dress, everyone may well have not said anything to them but were definitely talking amongst themselves about how rude it is. At one wedding the brides sister came into the church in a white lace dress & everyone started singing here comes the bride, what more can you say!!
  16.  
    • Flossie
      CommentAuthorFlossie
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      edited
     
    I think it would maybe be okay as an evening guest if it was quite a detailed dress and not obviously just plain white/cream... but definitely not as a day guest.

    Members signature icon
    Happily married
    18th June 2016
    xx
  17.  
    • CatherineR
      CommentAuthorCatherineR
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    Thanks Leasa, I am quite traditionalist apart from the wife part ;) but I don't see why just because times have changed that people should forget their values and what they stand for. A marriage/wedding day should remain about the couple, the love they share and people respecting their wishes for that one day.

    Members signature icon
    Married my wife on 15.08.15
    Honeymooned on the Isles of Scilly :)

  18.  
    • ErinP42
      CommentAuthorErinP42
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    Definitely not no one but bride should be in white it would just be wrong
  19.  
    • CommentAuthorJoannaS
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    one of our guests had a white dress on but to be honest I didn't notice till someone else said something to me, It didn't worry me at all she looked lovely in it.
  20.  
    • JennK
      CommentAuthorJennK
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    For me it would probably depend on the style of dress and how it was accessorized!

    Members signature icon
    Our perfect day - 08.08.15 <3


  21.  
    • FutureMrsW
      CommentAuthorFutureMrsW
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    I wouldn't wear white or cream as a guest, personally, but if someone decides to come to my wedding that way it wouldn't really bother me. I'd rather it didn't happen, but I wouldn't be angry or upset if it did.




  22.  
    • Mrs M Wade
      CommentAuthorMrs M Wade
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    I agree with Emma. I wouldn't be bothered on the day if anyone wore white/ivory. It would be obvious who the bride was and I think they would just look silly. My sister wore a white knee length dress to her sil wedding and when I saw the pictures I thought why did you wear white? I'd never wear white to a wedding nor would I wear black but each to their own

    Members signature icon
    Became Mrs Wade 06/08/2016


  23.  
    • MagpieBride
      CommentAuthorMagpieBride
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    Personally, at my own wedding, I'm not bothered - I'm not planning on a white dress for myself anyway.

    As a guest at other weddings, if I knew the bride was wearing white, ivory, or anything in the white scale, no way would I dream of wearing white (unless I was in the wedding party and asked to do so, like at my sister's).

    I think the symbolism is so heavy, and emotions can run so high at weddings, it's best to err on the side of caution.
  24.  
    • Velcro
      CommentAuthorVelcro
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    I wouldnt be angry, id just find it a bit rude tbh. id never wear white at someone elses wedding

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    *Kelbel* is my wedding twinny!
  25.  
    • Myranny
      CommentAuthorMyranny
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    I went to a wedding once where a girl wore a white dress. I thought that was rude, but I thought it was ruder that she'd turned up in a dress that was basically meant for clubbing and you could almost see what she'd had for breakfast.

    I think it's rude to wear white on someone else's wedding day. Even my H2B has been trying to wear a white suit and I'm not having it. Lol. But I'd prefer someone wore say a knee length white dress, to a dress in any colour that barely covered their @rse. xx
  26.  
    • Mrs T Hurley!
      CommentAuthorMrs T Hurley!
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      edited
     
    I personally wouldn't wear white to a wedding (unless it's mine!) as others may be offended but if someone came to my wedding dressed in white it wouldn't bother me. For me it's just a colour.

    However, if they were blatantly wearing a wedding dress, then I'd be peeved! x

    Members signature icon
    Met 18/09/03
    Engaged 06/09/08
    Getting married 05/09/17
  27.  
    • Elinor Claire
      CommentAuthorElinor Claire
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    I wouldn't have minded, but I've always avoided wearing white to someone else's wedding. I had a couple of people asking me about their dresses for my wedding, one worried that there was too much white and one worrying that it was too close to the bridesmaids' colour. In both cases I told them that as long as they didn't turn up in a wedding gown I didn't mind what they wore.

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    30th August 2014 was the best birthday ever.
    It was the day that I became Mrs. Dixon.

  28.  
    • VictoriaL46
      CommentAuthorVictoriaL46
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    For me I would be only slightly annoyed but not angry or upset. In the end they're not gonna miss who the bride is but it is rude. One of my friends sent me a pic of her in a while maxi dress saying she was going to wear this to my wedding. I very gently explained that it's not the done thing at a British wedding (she's Asian and only ever been to Asian weddings) she was initially offended that I would tell her she couldn't wear something but after I explained she might be "tutted" at by others she gave in. In the end she decided not to come. Ah well.

    I wouldn't mind if it was a white floral dress or something like that though.

    Members signature icon
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  29.  
    • GemmaB596
      CommentAuthorGemmaB596
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    One of my friends from work wore white to our wedding (she wasn't at the ceremony, just the reception) and, to be honest, I didn't even notice until I was looking through the pictures and one of the guys from work said "I told her not to wear white"(!) It obviously didn't bother me in the slightest (given that I didn't even notice!) I don't know if I might have felt differently if she was at the ceremony as well, but I doubt it.
  30.  
    • KirstyR386
      CommentAuthorKirstyR386
      Is poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadge
     
    White is a big no no for me for guests. I think I will clarify that by saying plainer white/cream as I have worn a dress with lots of blue flowers on it but the background coliur was white to a wedding but to me thats different because its part of a pattern not just "here I am in my white dress" kinda thing. X
  31.  
    • leasa
      CommentAuthorleasa
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    I agree, white background with a heavy pattern is different.

    I don't think it would be possible to upstage a bride unless you wear an actual wedding dress, but I must admit I'd be "tutting" along with the best of people because I've been told since I was little how it's not right to wear white.

    Members signature icon
    Met 30th May 2005
    Proposed in Monte Carlo August 25th 2013
    Became Mrs K on 30th May 2015
    Married my Gorgeous Greek God
  32.  
    • lala "mod" bunni
      CommentAuthorlala "mod" bunni
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    we asked all our guests to wear black and white only to our uk ceremony

  33.  
    • DeniseA23
      CommentAuthorDeniseA23
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    Depending on the dress I would probably be a bit miffed but I don't know how much attention I would really give it xoxo




  34.  
    • CharlotteE98
      CommentAuthorCharlotteE98
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    My Sister wanted to wear an ivory dress to our wedding. I told her that it was up to her but mentioned the colours that other people were wearing. She quickly changed her outfit. Her MIL wore a cream dress to her wedding and she was furious, so she should really have known better.
  35.  
    • InDreamland
      CommentAuthorInDreamland
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    I'd have been angry and upset, it is just not appropriate. Only the bride should wear white/ivory.

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    Had our dream perfect honeymoon in Hawaii!

  36.  
    • LornaB75
      CommentAuthorLornaB75
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    ive never really though about this... but i dont think i will be bothered! as long as they dont turn up in a big princess ball gown dress or something lol. i wore white jeans to my uncles wedding a few weeks ago, i didnt even think about it upsetting anyone its not crossed my mind that the colour could upset somebody and i personally dont care what colours my guests wear x
  37.  
    • CarolH81
      CommentAuthorCarolH81
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
      edited
     
    My sister was going to wear white suit until my mum told her no! The only thing I have asked Is no hats or fascinators I really have a thing about hats, I will be staring at them all day haha x
  38.  
    • InDreamland
      CommentAuthorInDreamland
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    Lol Carol!

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    Married the love of my life on Saturday 11th May 2013 xxx
    Had our dream perfect honeymoon in Hawaii!

  39.  
    • InDreamland
      CommentAuthorInDreamland
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    I wore a knee length white dress to a wedding once but it had pastel embroidered flowers all over it beneath the waist and a black ribbon around the waist.

    I ensured I got approval and permission from the bride before I wore it so I knew it would not upset x

    Members signature icon
    Married the love of my life on Saturday 11th May 2013 xxx
    Had our dream perfect honeymoon in Hawaii!

  40.  
    • MrsThomson2B
      CommentAuthorMrsThomson2B
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    I couldn't care what colour my guests wear as long as they dress appropriatly, I have one relative who will turn up in the weirdest outfit that just isnt suitable
  41.  
    • InDreamland
      CommentAuthorInDreamland
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    My uncle turned up in shorts and a tshirt with a picture of a bow tie on it! That's weird!

    Members signature icon
    Married the love of my life on Saturday 11th May 2013 xxx
    Had our dream perfect honeymoon in Hawaii!

  42.  
    • Flossie
      CommentAuthorFlossie
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    At the wedding we went to last weekend there was a guy in scruffy jeans, t-shirt, hoody and trainers... very inappropriate.

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    Happily married
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    xx
  43.  
    • InDreamland
      CommentAuthorInDreamland
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    Some people have no respect for weddings.

    Members signature icon
    Married the love of my life on Saturday 11th May 2013 xxx
    Had our dream perfect honeymoon in Hawaii!

  44.  
    • Flossie
      CommentAuthorFlossie
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    Just don't understand what thought processes someone would have to think turning up in something like that would be appropriate... people are strange!!

    Members signature icon
    Happily married
    18th June 2016
    xx
  45.  
    • Emily17
      CommentAuthorEmily17
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    I sang at a wedding about a month or so ago. there was one woman wearing a stretch denim skirt and t-shirt with trainers. I was amazed

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    Met in 2009
    He proposed Jan 2014
    Will become Mrs P 7th October 2017
  46.  
    • Emily17
      CommentAuthorEmily17
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    Although I did go to another wedding 2 years ago which we didn't realise it was a wedding!
    They sent general party invites saying we want a summer party. there will be a surprise at 4 and the surprise was their wedding! the FOB was wearing shorts and a t-shirt as even he didn't know about it!

    Members signature icon
    Met in 2009
    He proposed Jan 2014
    Will become Mrs P 7th October 2017
  47.  
    • InDreamland
      CommentAuthorInDreamland
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    Emily that is so cool!

    Members signature icon
    Married the love of my life on Saturday 11th May 2013 xxx
    Had our dream perfect honeymoon in Hawaii!

  48.  
    • Emily17
      CommentAuthorEmily17
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    Yeah, it was one of the nicest wedding that I have ever been too. Even the bridesmaids and most of their children didn't know until the day of the wedding. They have a lot of relatives who are unwell and didn't want to put any stress on anyone

    Members signature icon
    Met in 2009
    He proposed Jan 2014
    Will become Mrs P 7th October 2017
  49.  
    • InDreamland
      CommentAuthorInDreamland
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    That's so lovely.

    Members signature icon
    Married the love of my life on Saturday 11th May 2013 xxx
    Had our dream perfect honeymoon in Hawaii!

  50.  
    • Mrs Jones
      CommentAuthorMrs Jones
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    Somebody I know was a bridesmaid recently. I don't know the bride, but from the photos that were on the book with a face it looks like all of the bridesmaid dresses are also white...!!! Never seen that before.

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    First Date 26 April 2014
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