Wedding Forum - Can you veto a plus one?...

Hi all,

I have this friend - she's actually my brothers ex, but we've always kept in touch (my brothers fine with it)...

She is invited to the evening reception...there are another couple who are mutual friends of ours who are also invited, however I have my doubts about whether they'll turn up so she won't really know anybody, so I said she could bring a plus one.

Anyway, i get on Facebook and she's been tagged on a post 'yaaaaa so looking forward to being a plus one with xxxxx, gonna have a craaaazy night'.....so I began to suspect that this lass was Xxxxxx's guest...Which is fine, I didn't expect her to ask permission, ill admit I was kinda taken aback as I've met quite a few of her friends before and get on well with them, so thought shed ask one of them. Anyway, my friend confirmed that she was the plus one.

I'm probably being really silly, but my brothers ex has told me all sorts of stories about this lass....that she's a nutter who kicks off all the time, she's always getting arrested for fighting etc she also knocks about with some friends of my ex who are all alcoholics (ie drink white cider from the moment they wake up til the moment they pass out) who I have nothing to do with...

Part of me thinks 'who am I to judge? I don't even know the girl...' then another part thinks 'yeah but do I really want to put that theory to test on my wedding do?'

With seventeen days to go, I'm not sure if it's just me being a bit over-stressy, or I should just nip this in the bud right now....

Xx

Yeah... say the plus one is for her DATE... not a random pal. Just explain its in case she's in a relationship, not to bring a friend.

I would ask said friend what on earth she was thinking inviting someone like that to a wedding? without wanting to 'judge a book by it's cover' (if you like), she has told you all these stories about her starting fights etc and then seeing that on fb it doesn't exactly shed her in a good light!
I would consider asking to meet her if possible before the wedding once or twice, saying I want to know everyone at least a little bit before the big day even if it's just for a coffee or something so you can maybe get an inkling of what she may be like on the day, good luck xx

You can also make it clear that if this plus one behaves unacceptably she will be made to leave.

Yeah i'd say to have a chat with this plus one and talk to your friend about your concerns. Hopefully your friends can put your concerns to rest or at least consider inviting someone you are more comfortable with.