FREE Wedding Table Planner

+ FREE Wedding Budget Planner and more wedding planning tools

Join now free to use

Wedding Forum - Just wanted your views ladies and gents :)...

Not signed in (Sign In)

UKbride Supermarket


* Discount available to Power Users only. Terms and conditions apply. more

  1.  
    • Mrs Ross
      CommentAuthorMrs Ross
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
      edited
     
    Right so here is the story its a bit of a long one sorry,

    Right back in 2008 (i was 28 and am now 31) i got married to whom i thought was someone special. We got maried in a hotel and the ex was adamant we were not gonna have a church wedding. My parents paid for the WHOLE LOT!!!! his parents never paid for any which really angered a few people but thats a different story altogether! Well after 11 months he declared he had been sleeping with someone else and he no longer loved me and that was end to it- he just didnt love me so tough!! ! Anyway fast forward a few years i get divorced and meet someone else and in time get engaged, mum and dad are NOT thrilled i can kinda understand this, .as they dont want me to go through the same and they did pay for the first wedding. This was 14 months ago i got engaged again and am due to be married in like 12 months i thought mum and dad might have come round to it by now but no. Im a bit upset about it. So i was just wondering is anyone else getting married a second time and having the same problem? Also this is H2bs 1st wedding so just because ive been married before why should he miss out on the whole wedding experience?
  2.  
    • KarenB9
      CommentAuthorKarenB9
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    Are you parents not behind this because they dont like your H2B or because they feel that have to pay and cant afford it ?
  3.  
    • Mrs Ross
      CommentAuthorMrs Ross
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    neither they do like h2b and come to visit us a lot but everytime the wedding gets mentioned they either change the subject or tell me im daft to get married again and thats it and they know full well we are paying for everything!!! They know thats why i do so many hours at work but my mum just says well if you werent getting married then u wouldnt have to do so many hours but its like we are getting married hello!!!
  4.  
    • fiona
      CommentAuthorfiona
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    Sounds like they are scared of seeing you hurt again.
  5.  
    • Mrs Ross
      CommentAuthorMrs Ross
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    I would really love to believe that fiona but it seems they aint interested and its really quite upsetting as where H2b mum is the opposite she cant stop talking about and gets herself all excited to the point shes like oh i can see this happening or them as a fg and this would be good and im like WTF!!!! lol
  6.  
    • KarenB9
      CommentAuthorKarenB9
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    I would of thought the same as fiona. I suppose the only way your gonna find out the reason why they dont want to get involved is to sit them down and explain your feelings to them and find out why they are being this way. because until you do you cant move forward as you dont know what you up against.
  7.  
    • Mrs Ross
      CommentAuthorMrs Ross
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    but its hard to speak to them beause they dont want to know :( i just dont know what to do
  8.  
    • KarenB9
      CommentAuthorKarenB9
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    urrmm what about inviting them out to dinner and also invite H2B parents as well maybe then they will see how much input H2B parents are putting in they might show a bit more of an interest ? or maybe they will when you are closer to your date.
  9.  
    • Shirleygirly
      CommentAuthorShirleygirly
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    It's my first time but h2b has done it before. When he told a couple of his old friends that he was getting married they gave him a hard time about jumping into marriage and made a couple of judgements about me having never met me and still haven't to this day. It's upset him a bit that they can't be supportive because he made one mistake and explained to one of them that he didn't feel anywhere near as much for his ex as he does for me but I don't think they're taking it too seriously. That's just his friends that I haven't met. I'd be gutted if it was family.

    I hope your parents come round to the idea, you deserve to be happy after the way you've been treated and I'm sure they know that you aren't taking the decision lightly. Anyone who has been betrayed in such a way would be cautious of being burnt twice and I think it's great that you are able to put your trust in someone again.

    I can't wait until 29/06/2013
    The day I marry the man of my dreams!

  10.  
    • Laura JaneW
      CommentAuthorLaura JaneW
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    I can see your parents point of view if they are scared you might get hurt again especially if this wedding seems quick too. In my opinion the closer the wedding gets, your mum and dad will probably get a bit more excited. I think although they like your H2B it might just be a trust issue with past experience. I've it a little more time. Sit ur parents down and ask them why they feel the way they do. Also as someone else said, get h2b parents and your together with yourselves for a meal and let the mums get excited together!
  11.  
    • Shazk
      CommentAuthorShazk
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    Couldnt agree more with Laura JaneW talk o ur parents maybe they feel u just going along with it all as thats what H2B wants explain how u feel and then get everyone together!.

    It is hard when 2nd time round (its my 1st and h2b 2nd) and i did keep asking him is he sure he wanted to do this blah blah blah but he asked so i assume yes (he so stubbon he wouldnt of done if didnt want to) x

    Hope get it sorted, its not nice when feel like that (for other reasons my dad cant get to involved in mine at moment so its maily IL2B and i dont like it ) xx BIG HUGS xx

    Members signature icon
    Away with the flutterbys xxx


  12.  
    • Glitterfairy
      CommentAuthorGlitterfairy
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    It sounds very much they are worried about it and do not want to see a repeat of what happened before. I got engaged 5 years after I got divorced, 3 years after getting with H2B. Mum had paid for some of my first wedding, so was not expecting her to pay for any of this one, but last week handed me a cheque towards it which has helped a lot. Maybe once all the planning is going through and they can see how much you both want this they will come round.

    Members signature icon
    Our wedding day - 6 October 2012


  13.  
    • Officially Mrs M
      CommentAuthorOfficially Mrs M
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    all you can do hun is continue as normal and when your parents get the invite they might start to realise its happening, they obviously don't want a repeat of the first marriage (which wasn't your fault it ended) so just you and H2B continue planning but if it bothers you maybe put it off a little bit as 3 years isn't a long time

    Members signature icon
    8th September 2012 I married my best friend
    1st September 2014 our little family grew by one

    Women are made to be loved, not understood. - Oscar Wilde
  14.  
    • Princess2be
      CommentAuthorPrincess2be
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    I think they are just being protective hun.
    x




  15.  
    • madison_uk
      CommentAuthormadison_uk
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    this is my second time round and first for my h2b so i can see why your parents were are a bit worried mine are too, were paying for it ourselves too as my mum paid allot on the first one too, just keep going and they will hopefully start to realize that everything will be ok, maybe take them out for meal and let them see how happy you are together might reassure them, mine have come round to the idea after seeing the kids in there page boy and flower girl outfits, and are helping much more now. We have been together for nearly 4 years i don't think it matters how long you have been together my grandparents met and got married in a month they have been together 60 years.




  16.  
    • Tori
      CommentAuthorTori
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    Have you tried talking to them about it? From what you said it seems that both of them only did it once and when we walk down that aisle none of us have any intention of doing it again, we get married to the person that we plan to spend the rest of our lives with. Unfortunately this day and age more so than ever things do go wrong. You split up from your last husband through no fault of your own. You still deserve happiness and you may needto help your parents understand that xx




  17.  
    • Vickie
      CommentAuthorVickie
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    I agree with Tori, maybe they don't want you seeing you hurt after what your first husband did.

    xxx
  18.  
    • Mrs Ross
      CommentAuthorMrs Ross
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    Thanks ladies we are taking them out for a meal at the weekend im hoping in time they will come round, @soon to be mrs mann there is no reason why i should put my wedding off i want to get on with the rest of my life, not put it on hold or i would have no life at all if i put it on hold.
 

UKbride's £25,000 Wedding Competition Prize Partners

Enter Now