Wedding Forum - Traditions and their meanings Share them...

Hi all sorry this is long but i thought it was intresting and thought you ladies and guys might want to read this?

Wedding traditions go back about as far as early civilization records. Through the years the origins of many traditions have been forgotten. In some cases, as in the earliest roots of the tradition of a "best man," that may be for the good. Some traditions have their beginnings in the very practical needs that accompany an occasion as complex as a wedding. Some have their basis in superstitious beliefs. Let's explore some of the traditions that have become so much a part of tHe wonderful event that is a wedding.
The word "bride" comes from old English for the name for "cook," while the word groom comes from from "male child."

The term "wedlock" comes from the old English word "wedd" and old Scottish "wad," which both appropriately mean "to pledge." "Lock" comes from the old English term "lac," which means to carry out an action. That, in keeping with the original meaning wedlock which was the pledging of property, as payment for his daughter, to the bride's father.

The custom of proposing on one knee hearkens back to the days of knighthood and chivalry when it was customary for a knight to dip his knee in a show of servitude to his mistress and his master. The knight would kneel before a tournament and wait for "his" lady to toss him her ribbon or colors, as an indication of her favor.

In years gone by, the differentiation between the genders was very clearly defined and it was unheard of for a woman to propose to a man. Today, that's not the case. Albeit, it's still men who do the majority of proposing, there are women who have made the "get down on one knee" proposal their own.

Marriage announcements are a custom that date back almost a thousand years. In the past, the purpose of an announcement was to give the members of the community an opportunity to object to the marriage, either because the prospective bride or groom was already married, already betrothed, or for some other justifiable reason.

The tradition of asking for the bride's "hand in marriage" comes from a Roman custom called "joining of hands." In a symbolic purchase, the groom would give the bride's father a coin, and the bride would then be passed from her father's "hand" to her husband's.

The tradition of a best man has its origin with the Germanic Goths, when it was customary and preferable for a man to marry a woman from within his own community. When women came into short supply "locally," eligible bachelors would have to seek out and capture a bride from a neighboring community. As you might guess, this was not a one-person operation, and so the future bridegroom would be accompanied by a male companion who would help. Our custom of the best man is a throwback to that two-man, strong-armed tactic, for, of course the future groom would select only the best man he knew to come along for such an important task.

The role of the best man evolved. By 200 A.D. his task was still more than just safeguarding the ring. There remained a real threat that the bride's family would attempt to forcibly obtain her return, so the best man remained at the groom's side throughout the marriage ceremony, alert and well-armed. He continued his duties after the ceremony by standing guard as sentry outside the newlywed's home. Much of this is German folklore, but is not without written documentation and physical artifacts. We have records that indicate that beneath the altars of many churches of early peoples (the Huns, Goths, Visigoths, and Vandals) there lay an arsenal of clubs, knives, and spears. The indication is that these were there to protect the groom from possible attack by the bride's family in an attempt to recapture her. Traditionally, the bride stands to the left side of the groom. This was much more than meaningless etiquette. Among the Northern European barbarians (a name given to them by the Romans), a groom placed his captured bride to his left to protect her, as he kept his right hand free to use for defense. Also originating from this practice of abduction, which literally swept a bride off her feet, sprang the later symbolic act of carrying the bride across the threshold of her new home. And speaking of carrying the bride over the threshold, tradition dictates that the bride must never trip and fall as she enters her new home or she will have bad luck for all the years to come.

The bridal gown has always been a symbol of purity, and was in history an outward sign of a maiden's worthiness. The concept of a white wedding gown dates back to Queen Victoria. Marriage was considered a union between two families and it was essential that the bride be an honor to both. Purity was valued above all else and so great care was taken to ensure that the bride be presented as an unspoiled, protected, and valuable treasure. So, the white dress became the symbol of all these things, and a symbol of the bride-to-be's innocence. The elaborate styling of modern wedding gowns can be attributed to Empress Eugenie, the bride of Napoleon III. She was quite the fashion plate of her generation and wore what was to become worldwide style, replacing the customary wedding finery of the day.

It was thought that the white wedding gown also served to ward off evil spirits. Omens and evil spirits and good luck tokens were always a part of the wedding gown tradition. It was said that the bride should never make her own dress and should wait to have the last stitch sewn until just before she entered the church. It was also a popular traditon that the bride should not try on her complete wedding outfit before the wedding day or, it was felt, she would be "counting her chickens before they hatched."

Traditional bows, or love knots, which resemble a number eight on its side, originated in the late 1500's. The sideways eight, you will note is also the sign for infinity (i.e., eternity). In years past, brides wore dresses covered with love knots and after the wedding, guests would snip them off as souvenirs.

The wedding veil has a bit eerier history. It is a tradition believed to have developed from the Roman custom of having the bride wear a full-length veil that was later used as her burial shroud.
And, back to that capture theme . . . another theory is that the veil is reminiscent of the act of throwing a sack over the prospective bride's head while she was being carried off. Roman superstition also held that wearing a veil would confuse the evil spirits that loomed near the bride. It was said that the spirits might be jealous of the new couple's happiness and that covering the bride's face would keep them from recognizing her.
And yet another explanation . . . In ancient times, marriages were arranged by families and were often nothing more than good business deals. It happened more often than not that the first time the couples saw one another was standing at the altar on their wedding day. To ensure the groom wouldn't have second thoughts at the sight of a bride perhaps less attractive than he's assumed, veils were used to cover the bride's face. The veil was not lifted until the very end of the ceremony, only after the groom had already said, "I do."
This may also be the reason why traditionally the bride and groom are not allowed to see each other the day of the wedding.

Some traditions are rooted in superstition and closely connected with good and bad luck. One superstition proports that it is bad luck for a groom to see his bride on their wedding day. Another, also well know superstition is the tradition of "something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue, and a lucky sixpence in her shoe." This most familiar of wedding-related sayings dates back to Victorian times.

Throwing rice and old shoes at the end of the ceremony is a custom that has its origin with the ancient Assyrians, Hebrews, and Egyptians who gave or traded sandals as a symbol of good faith when striking a bargain. In the case of marriage, the bargain was the transfer of a father's authority over his daughter, to her new husband. The bride's father would give the groom one of her old shoes and the groom would tap the bride over the head with it. That act symbolized the groom's acceptance of his new responsibility.

There is reference to rice throwing in Roman history, in about 400 B.C. Then, a bridegroom would "say" goodbye to his bachelorhood by distributing walnuts to his "old" friends. That makes walnuts and hazelnuts the forerunners of today's rice and almonds.

Other sources make reference to the tradition in Tudor times of guests throwing shoes at the newly married couple. Presumably, this was done with "good intentions," because it was thought to bring good luck and fertility to the bride and groom, if they or their carriage were hit. This, incidentally, is where the custom of tying old shoes to back of the car may have originated. Yet other theories tell us that the tradition of tying shoes to the bumper of the car originated with "bride-stealing." As a sign of his anger, the bride's father would throw his shoes at the kidnapper groom with the stolen bride. Incidentally, it was also believed that leather had the power to ward off evil spirits!

To the ancient Assyrians, Hebrews, and Egyptians, rice symbolized fruitfulness, so it was "a natural" to be thrown at the new couple, after weddings, as a symbol of good wishes. The origin of throwing confetti over the newlyweds goes back to the Pagan rite of showering the couple with grain, as a symbol of fruitfulness. Pagans held the simple belief that the fertility of the seeds would be transferred to the couple. The symbolism of throwing rice holds same symbolic meaning. Beginning in the Middle Ages, rice became a symbol of fruitfulness amongst many early peoples. The tradition of throwing of rice may also have been a way to ward off evil spirits that hung around near the bride and groom. It may also have its origins in the "food tossing ritual," discussed elsewhere in this article.

A wedding cake is the traditional centerpiece at the wedding reception. You might find it interesting that originally, the cake was not eaten by, but thrown at the bride! It developed as one of the many fertility traditions surrounding a wedding. Ancient Romans believed that wheat and barley were symbols of fertility and so, wedding cakes included one or both of these ingredients. Incidentally, wheat was among the earliest grains (predating rice) to be ceremoniously showered on the bride and groom. In its earliest origins, the unmarried young women attending the wedding were expected to scramble for the grains to ensure their own betrothals, much as they do today for the bridal bouquet. Somewhere around 100 B.C.E., Roman bakers began creating small, sweet cakes with it. The tradition of pelting the bride, or breaking it over her head, died hard. The Roman poet and philosopher Lucretius in "On the Nature of Things" ("De Rerum Natura") wrote that the throwing tradition mellowed into a custom of crumbling the sweet, wheat cakes over the bride's head. As a further symbol of fertility, the couple was required to eat some of the crumbs, a custom known as "confarreato," translated into "eating together." After all the cakes were used up, the guests were supplied with handfuls of "confetto," a sweet meats mixture of nuts, dried fruit, and honeyed almonds.

The tradition of eating the crumbs of the wheat, sweet meat cakes spread throughout Europe. In England the tradition "broadened" to include the practice of washing down the cakes with a special ale called "bryd ealu," translated as "bride's ale," words that eventually became the word "bridal."

The lovely custom of distributing Wedding Favors has been around since ancient times. In the the late 17th century, guests were given favors such as scarves, garters and gloves. Today, some brides follow the custom of giving each guest five sugar coated almonds as symbols of health, wealth, fertility, happiness and long-life. This custom dates back to a Greek legend about Demophon who fell in love with the Tracian princess, Phyllis. Before the marriage ceremony could take place, Demophon's father died and Demophon returned to Athens for the funeral. He vowed to his beloved that he would return, but seriously miscalculated the amount of time it would take him to go to Athens and return. With him away for more than three months, Phyllis became convinced that he was not going to return and, in dispair, took her own life. The gods, the legend tells us, were so moved by her love for Demophon, that they transformed her into an almond tree. Upon his return, the grief stricken Demophon offered a sacrifice to the almond tree, and declared his undying love. The almond tree responded by immediately bursting into blossom. It is for this "reason," that the almond tree has become the symbol of impetuous youth and undying love.

Some also believed that eating five almonds wards off drunkenness and keeps the celebration from getting out of hand.

There is also historical evidence of the practice in 15th century English court. The custom was to give out little boxes of precious metal filled with almonds. The act symbolized good wishes for the coming year.

The wedding guest book was once a necessity. In days of old, everyone who attended a wedding was considered a witness and was required to sign the marriage document. Today, even though the legal requirements for witnesses has changed, the concept of a guest book remains as a wonderful remembrance for the wedding couple.

this thread is wonderful! so interesting!!

thats really interesting, thanks! I'd love to know where you got that information from too please! x

Love this thread, so interesting. Hails never knew that about friday 13th, so true when they say you learn something new everyday :))

50 wedding facts and trivia-

Good Luck and Bad Luck
1. Hey, brides, tuck a sugar cube into your glove -- according to Greek culture, the sugar will sweeten your union.
2. The English believe a spider found in a wedding dress means good luck. Yikes!

3. In English tradition, Wednesday is considered the "best day" to marry, although Monday is for wealth and Tuesday is for health.

4. The groom carries the bride across the threshold to bravely protect her from evil spirits lurking below.

5. Saturday is the unluckiest wedding day, according to English folklore. Funny -- it's the most popular day of the week to marry!

6. Ancient Romans studied pig entrails to determine the luckiest time to marry.

7. Rain on your wedding day is actually considered good luck, according to Hindu tradition!

8. For good luck, Egyptian women pinch the bride on her wedding day. Ouch!

9. Middle Eastern brides paint henna on their hands and feet to protect themselves from the evil eye. Find out about Muslim wedding rituals.

10. Peas are thrown at Czech newlyweds instead of rice.

11. A Swedish bride puts a silver coin from her father and a gold coin from her mother in each shoe to ensure that she'll never do without. Learn more about Swedish wedding traditions.

12. A Finnish bride traditionally went door-to-door collecting gifts in a pillowcase, accompanied by an older married man who represented long marriage.

13. Moroccan women take a milk bath to purify themselves before their wedding ceremony. See more Moroccan wedding customs.

14. In Holland, a pine tree is planted outside the newlyweds' home as a symbol of fertility and luck.

It's Got a Ring To It
15. Engagement and wedding rings are worn on the fourth finger of the left hand because it was once thought that a vein in that finger led directly to the heart.
16. About 70% of all brides sport the traditional diamond on the fourth finger of their left hand.

17. Priscilla Presley's engagement ring was a whopping 3 1/2-carat rock surrounded by a detachable row of smaller diamonds.

18. Diamonds set in gold or silver became popular as betrothal rings among wealthy Venetians toward the end of the fifteenth century.

19. In the symbolic language of jewels, a sapphire in a wedding ring means marital happiness.

20. A pearl engagement ring is said to be bad luck because its shape echoes that of a tear.

21. One of history's earliest engagement rings was given to Princess Mary, daughter of Henry VIII. She was two years old at the time.

22. Seventeen tons of gold are made into wedding rings each year in the United States!

23. Snake rings dotted with ruby eyes were popular wedding bands in Victorian England -- the coils winding into a circle symbolized eternity.

24. Aquamarine represents marital harmony and is said to ensure a long, happy marriage.

Fashionable Lore
25. Queen Victoria started the Western world's white wedding dress trend in 1840 -- before then, brides simply wore their best dress.
26. In Asia, wearing robes with embroidered cranes symbolizes fidelity for the length of a marriage.

27. Ancient Greeks and Romans thought the veil protected the bride from evil spirits. Brides have worn veils ever since.

28. On her wedding day, Grace Kelly wore a dress with a bodice made from beautiful 125-year-old lace.

29. Of course, Jackie Kennedy's bridesmaids were far from frumpy. She chose pink silk faille and red satin gowns created by African-American designer Ann Lowe (also the creator of Jackie's dress).

30. In Japan, white was always the color of choice for bridal ensembles -- long before Queen Victoria popularized it in the Western world.

31. Most expensive wedding ever? The marriage of Sheik Rashid Bin Saeed Al Maktoum's son to Princess Salama in Dubai in May 1981. The price tag? $44 million.

32. In Korea, brides don bright hues of red and yellow to take their vows.

33. Brides carry or wear "something old" on their wedding day to symbolize continuity with the past.

34. In Denmark, brides and grooms traditionally cross-dressed to confuse evil spirits!

35. The "something blue" in a bridal ensemble symbolizes purity, fidelity, and love.

Food and Family
36. In Egypt, the bride's family traditionally does all the cooking for a week after the wedding, so the couple can…relax.
37. In South Africa, the parents of both bride and groom traditionally carried fire from their hearths to light a new fire in the newlyweds' hearth.

38. The tradition of a wedding cake comes from ancient Rome, where revelers broke a loaf of bread over a bride's head for fertility's sake.

39. The custom of tiered cakes emerged from a game where the bride and groom attempted to kiss over an ever-higher cake without knocking it over.

40. Queen Victoria's wedding cake weighed a whopping 300 pounds.

41. Legend says single women will dream of their future husbands if they sleep with a slice of groom's cake under their pillows.

42. An old wives' tale: If the younger of two sisters marries first, the older sister must dance barefoot at the wedding or risk never landing a husband.

Show Off at a Cocktail Party
43. In many cultures around the world -- including Celtic, Hindu and Egyptian weddings -- the hands of a bride and groom are literally tied together to demonstrate the couple's commitment to each other and their new bond as a married couple (giving us the popular phrase "tying the knot").
44. The Roman goddess Juno rules over marriage, the hearth, and childbirth, hence the popularity of June weddings.

45. Princess Victoria established the tradition of playing Wagner's "Bridal Chorus" during her wedding processional in 1858.

46. The bride stands to the groom's left during a Christian ceremony, because in bygone days the groom needed his right hand free to fight off other suitors.

47. On average, 7,000 couples marry each day in the United States.

48. Valentine's Day and New Year's Eve are the two busiest "marriage" days in Las Vegas -- elopement central!

49. The Catholic tradition of "posting the banns" to announce a marriage originated as a way to ensure the bride and groom were not related.

50. Stag parties were first held by ancient Spartan soldiers, who kissed their bachelor days goodbye with a raucous party.

The father daughter dance is tradionally BEFORE the first dance
The father daughter dance is the fathers last act as the brides father while she is still in his care
He then passes her care over to her new husband where they have the first dance......his frst act as her new husband!

Does anyone know anymore??

This is interesting too x