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  1.  
    • SydnieH
      CommentAuthorSydnieH
      Got married 6 years ago
      Posted: Nov 19th 2014
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    Did anyone else get closer and closer to their wedding and start to panic that everything wasn't going to be paid for in time? We have just over 4 months left to go until the wedding and feels like we still have far too much to pay off! Please tell me it somehow just falls into place. I'm lying awake at night worrying about it all and comfort eating, which obviously isn't good as will be looking rather huge and blackeyed for the wedding haha
  2.  
    • Flossie
      CommentAuthorFlossie
      Got married 5 years ago
      Posted: Nov 19th 2014
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    I can only imagine how stressful it is at this time. I've already done my own fair share of stressing and we've still got 18 months or so to pay everything off!

    Have you sat down and worked out exactly how much there is left to pay and taken into consideration your pay days, how much you're able to put aside each month, etc?

    It's no good lying awake at night worrying, you're just going to make yourself poorly :( maybe try taking sleeping tablets if it's really that bad? Comfort eating isn't such a bad thing though, got to love food ;) x

    Members signature icon
    Happily married
    18th June 2016
    xx
  3.  
    • JennK
      CommentAuthorJennK
      Got married 5 years ago
      Posted: Nov 19th 2014
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    As Flos has said, have you worked it all out? No need to panic, I know it's tricky!

    Members signature icon
    Our perfect day - 08.08.15 <3


  4.  
    • SydnieH
      CommentAuthorSydnieH
      Got married 6 years ago
      Posted: Nov 19th 2014
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    We've tried but my H2B gets himself all stressed and just gives up saying we will deal with it closer. I had spare cash the other day so paid some off our flowers and favors but he never seems to have spare cash. Seriously don't know whats happening with our money, we're worse off since I started working. I start to write stuff down to try and come up with a plan but then something crops up which means that money is used somewhere else. I need to prioritise and decide what needs paying first etc.
  5.  
    • Flossie
      CommentAuthorFlossie
      Got married 5 years ago
      Posted: Nov 19th 2014
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    I think you probably need to speak to your OH about it.. it IS close now! Ignoring it isn't just going to make it go away (unfortunately). At least you are getting things paid off! It's probably normal to have a little panic but don't worry yourself too much, I'm sure everything will work out fine if you sit down and work everything out x

    Members signature icon
    Happily married
    18th June 2016
    xx
  6.  
    • CamilaL
      CommentAuthorCamilaL
      Got married 3 years ago
      Posted: Nov 19th 2014
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    Just do it yourself... Check everything you have paid and how much is left. I know my h2b wouldn't be helpful at all lol When you get how much is left and when it's due, you can make a plan with him... or just tell him how much he will need to give you to sort it out. I have about 27 months, and I'm already checking prices on everything, so I know if my budget will be enough. He thinks I'm crazy for being worried about the wedding by this far, but I can't help it. My parents are paying for the wedding and I will try to do everything I can without needing any more money.
    Just try to do it, try to find out how much more you have to pay, and after that, you decide how you're gonna do it.
  7.  
    • SydnieH
      CommentAuthorSydnieH
      Got married 6 years ago
      Posted: Nov 19th 2014
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    I've got pen to paper as I type, it's actually 4 months exactly tomorrow!!!!!
  8.  
    • KatieA72
      CommentAuthorKatieA72
      Got married 6 years ago
      Posted: Nov 19th 2014
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    OMG! that could of been me that wrote that post!

    This is EXACTLY how I am feeling right now. It's suddenly hit me that we only have 4 more paydays until the majority of our balances have to be paid. Here's what I have done:

    1. Tell your family that Christmas this year will very small and then set yourself a budget per person. We are only spending £20 a family member where we would usually spend about £50 per person. Seriously cut back on food bills etc if you haven't already done so. I have told my friends I am passing on socialising the next few months - it'll be worth it on the wedding day!

    2. If you haven't already done so, get a budget system going. I've used Excel and have a list of all our suppliers, the total amount, what is paid and how much is left to pay. Then as we pay things off I can amend the spreadsheet.

    3. Next (this is the scary part!) work out how much you can realistically put towards the wedding between now and then. You HAVE to be realistic. There is no point pretending you can contribute more than you can afford to as when you cant do it you will then be really stressed.

    4. Plan for any shortfall. We worked out we will be about £500 short and so we have told ourselves we are fine with this going on credit card/over draft for the time being.

    I also have the added stress that we are buying a house at the same time, a new build that is due to complete 2 weeks before we get married! So on top of paying for the wedding and honeymoon I have also been stressing about paying for the house too.

    I have just told myself there is no good panicking this late in the day. If we needed to, we have access to £7000 on credit cards and overdrafts. Obviously we don't want to use it but lying awake panicking is useless as if the worst happened then we would just use that money!

    I hope this has helped and I promise you once you know the figures you should feel a whole lot better. I slept so well last night for the first time in a week!
  9.  
    • KatieA72
      CommentAuthorKatieA72
      Got married 6 years ago
      Posted: Nov 19th 2014
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    I get married two weeks after you Sydnie on the 4th April but my hen do is on your wedding day, 20th March!
  10.  
    • SydnieH
      CommentAuthorSydnieH
      Got married 6 years ago
      Posted: Nov 19th 2014
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    Well we have:
    £500 left to pay off suits
    £500 left for our wedding singer/dj
    £295 left for photographer
    £99 left for flowers/favors
    £300 left for the cake
    We pay £75 a month off our rings and last payment is January (I think-may be December)

    The rest is a blur!
    We still need to buy flower girl dresses, we need 3 and can't buy until close to the wedding as they're all growing so quick, was going to go to D3b3nhams or somewhere similar. till need my shoes and accessories etc. Need to pay hairdresser which is approx. £130 for myself and 3 bridesmaids
    Then the venue is our struggle, my H2B is adamant he wants a drinks package but I think it's not essential. I get that it can be an expensive day for guests etc. but it's going to add £800 at least onto the cost of the venue.
    And finally we still have some of the registrar fees to pay!

    I think I've got it all :/
  11.  
    • SydnieH
      CommentAuthorSydnieH
      Got married 6 years ago
      Posted: Nov 19th 2014
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    So you will be feeling exactly like me at the minute Katie! It's sooooo damn close. We both work and are finding it harder since I started work in September, how is that possible or fair
  12.  
    • AmyK
      CommentAuthorAmyK
      Got married 7 years ago
      Posted: Nov 19th 2014
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    Sydnie - as the other ladies have said, get a spreadsheet going - including a separate one for household bills & other outgoings so you know exactly what you can afford to save up/pay off.
    For Christmas, is there a way you can give favours instead of presents, say a nights babysitting, a day gardening or using your skills for something? That could save money!

    You could get the dresses in the sales if you're lucky - look now & make a wish list of which ones you would like & go bargain hunting in January. Send pics to family members if they live near other stores so they can grab missing sizes etc. on your behalf. Plan well & you could save a bundle on them.

    As for the drinks package - its nice if you can afford it, but not essential. My BFF had one but was under-used as people preferred to get their own drinks, as you can't suit everyone's tastes (the cocktail they had was horrible). Our guests preferred to get their own beers, ciders, spirits etc - and they didn't mind. If h2b is so adamant he wants it, why not let him stump up the cash for it?




  13.  
    • CamilaL
      CommentAuthorCamilaL
      Got married 3 years ago
      Posted: Nov 19th 2014
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    I've found this website, it's from an american bridal magazine. They have something like a budget control, and you can plan all the payments (they will remember you what's is due and when you're supposed to pay for them).
    It has been really useful for me, while I'm only trying to see if my budget is enough and what I can change to save money. It may help you :)
  14.  
    • CharlotteE98
      CommentAuthorCharlotteE98
      Got married 6 years ago
      Posted: Nov 19th 2014
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    I started sending emails out to people to find out when they need final payments and kept all the information on a spreadsheet. I have a column for how much it costs, how much the deposit was and who is paying for it and when it needs paying by. I'm panicking a bit because the church don't want payment until about a month before the wedding!

    Bh$ are good for reasonably priced bridesmaid and flowergirl dresses.

    We are also having a cheap christmas and will have to stay in on new years eve. The problem I have is that my Niece's birthday is 13th December and H2B's birthday is 22nd December! An expensive month. My Sister is expecting baby number 2 on 28th December!

    It probably doesn't feel like it right now, but everything will come together as long as you keep your spreadsheet accurate and up to date. You'll be fine if you've got a plan and stick to it :o)

    My hen night is on 20th March too Katie :o)
  15.  
    • AprilS61
      CommentAuthorAprilS61
      Got married 6 years ago
      Posted: Nov 20th 2014
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    Katie we get married the same day!

    Sydnie, you really do need to speak to him. He might find it easier if you sit and work it out together.

    Work out everything to the closest pound if possible! Get your bills worked out and food so you know what's general outgoing.

    Make a list of suppliers. Mines on Excel with every single supplier/item the total cost, what's paid, what's left to pay. If its paid - it's highlighted green and ticked and not to be worried about. If its to be paid (as most thing are a month before) its highlighted red. Then I worked out overall cost of what's in Red to be paid. We have about £2800 to save ourselves (have £1600 sp far) we have a list of what my dad still owes us and what in laws are paying for. Every time you pay a bit off keep updating it and you can't go wrong!

    Members signature icon
    Mr & Mrs Swan 04/04/15


  16.  
    • Irishbride2be
      CommentAuthorIrishbride2be
      Got married 5 years ago
      Posted: Nov 20th 2014
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     


    Met my dream man on Halloween 2012
    Proposed to me in Spain 22nd July 2014
    Getting married 12 september 2015
    Marrying my forever best friend :-)
  17.  
    • SydnieH
      CommentAuthorSydnieH
      Got married 6 years ago
      Posted: Nov 20th 2014
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    Thanks for the help ladies, I'm going to make a spread sheet this afternoon and colour code it etc. I basically told my H2B that it's not going away just cos he doesn't want to think about it lol. So he's agreed we can look at it. As for Christmas, thankfully we're sorted as we get vouchers so have £450 there for Christmas which will cover enough for the kids, family and friends and to get my shoes for the wedding, or underwear, possibly both.
    I've thankfully got my dress, just needs a little altering which my mam and dad are covering the costs for. They have said that if we fall short they will help but they're already helping enough as it is and I feel bad so want as much paid as possible by ourselves
  18.  
    • AmandaK74
      CommentAuthorAmandaK74
      Got married 6 years ago
      Posted: Nov 20th 2014
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    thats the best thing to do sydnieH i did a spread sheet from day one and worked out what I was going to purchase every month, its worked a treat and avoided much stress

    met 11th December 2010
    engaged 2nd August 2013
    getting married to the love of my life 11th july 2015
  19.  
    • *KelBel*
      CommentAuthor*KelBel*
      Got married 6 years ago
      Posted: Nov 20th 2014
      Is poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadge
     
    We felt exactly the same as you Sydnie...we had more than we realised still to pay when it came to 5 months before the wedding, we were lucky that my hubby's parents gave us another £2k as we wouldn't have afforded it otherwise and I know that isn't possible for everyone, but some of the posts on here have given some great ideas x

    Members signature icon
    Velcro...my wedding day twinny! The Two Kel's!
    Got engaged 14/10/12 in Central Park NYC!
    Became Mrs Macdonald 13th September 2014
    Mummy to 4 girlies and baby blue boy Due 10/05/2016
  20.  
    • SydnieH
      CommentAuthorSydnieH
      Got married 6 years ago
      Posted: Nov 21st 2014
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    Well I did a lot of math last night and we were going to talk tonight but my H2B is now working through the night so wont see him until tomorrow night. Spoke a little with him earlier on the phone and he's going to talk to his dad and my mam and dad have offered to help a little which is great, even though we didn't want to have to ask. Spread sheet definitely helped!!
  21.  
    • Katya
      CommentAuthorKatya
      Got married 6 years ago
      Posted: Nov 22nd 2014
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    ok i stopped reading when you said how much you were needing to pay off.....

    My h2b's suit cost £21 to buy from T3sco - (why pay over £500 on suits?)

    we are all doing our own hair & make up - (get someone in to give you a tutorial... call it part of your hen night prob be about £40ish)

    I found a woman on fb who was going to do me a 3 tier cake for £79! (Is it worth losing your deposit to get the same sort of cake for £200 less in the long run?!)

    I just finished brewing my own wine.... it only cost £60 ish for the brewing kit & the bottles. I made 21 Litres in total & if i pay corkage for 12 bottles which is enough for all guests to have 2 glasses each it will only cost me £95 in corkage so £155 rather than £800!

    This year for Christmas
    Eldest Son - £20 clothes
    Youngest Son - £20 clothes
    H2B - "grr man munchies tin" full of chocolate bars from me £10
    H2B - "worlds greatest pop in a jar" from the kids - £5
    Girls x 4 (mothers etc) - "spa in a jar" / "pampering in a jar" - £20
    my grandparents - "picnic in a jar for two" - £6
    h2b's dad - "cleans up well in a jar" - £5
    bil2b - "caramel apple in a jar" - £3
    kids stockings - £20
    special friend - watch - £3

    Total for Christmas.... £112

    We are getting married March 25th...... We have £200 to pay on wedding left & just over £800 on honeymoon which isnt until may.

    It is possible... but it may mean you need to cut down on what you originally thought you could afford.

    Members signature icon
    Find out who you are & do it on purpose!


  22.  
    • *KelBel*
      CommentAuthor*KelBel*
      Got married 6 years ago
      Posted: Nov 22nd 2014
      Is poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadge
     
    Well you're getting some where at least :-) have you thought of ebay ing anything? Ppl seem to pay more in the run up to xmas, and the best time for your item to end is Sunday between 7-9pm if you decide to do it x

    Members signature icon
    Velcro...my wedding day twinny! The Two Kel's!
    Got engaged 14/10/12 in Central Park NYC!
    Became Mrs Macdonald 13th September 2014
    Mummy to 4 girlies and baby blue boy Due 10/05/2016
  23.  
    • SydnieH
      CommentAuthorSydnieH
      Got married 6 years ago
      Posted: Nov 24th 2014
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    Christmas is sorted as we have vouchers, our kids are really young so wouldn't think they're expensive but things add up easy with them. The suits I had nothing to do with and personally think it's ridiculous, H2B picked them and paid deposit etc without telling me. We aren't allowed to take our own alcohol or food to the venue, but think I've talked him out of it. As for hairdresser, I'm not a girly girl and struggle to even straighten my own hair. I was going to ask my sister to do it but with the time we're getting married it's just a lot of pressure on her, plus she is worried it won't go right on the day etc so doesn't want the responsibility.
  24.  
    • SydnieH
      CommentAuthorSydnieH
      Got married 6 years ago
      Posted: Nov 24th 2014
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    Should probably add though that the suits price includes the purchase of 3 pairs of shoes and 3 set of cufflinks. 3 adults suits and 2 kids suits. So sounds expensive but on the break down probably not too bad, could have made a £100 saving or so elsewhere like.
 
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