Just after a bit of advice. I'm at the stage of sending save-the-dates out, my wedding isn't until next summer but various family members coming from Australia etc have asked about dates so that they can book flights well in advance. So decided to send them all out now.
I'm inviting some friends from work - the wedding is about 150 miles from where we live and work so it's been a bit of a tough one deciding who to invite from work, as we can't really ask people to come all that way just for the evening. I've narrowed it down though to pretty much my department (I work in a school) and a couple of LSA's who I work with closely and get on really well with.
There is one issue though that I just don't know how to tackle, and now have to sort as I am sending out save-the-dates. There is one person in my department (his partner also works at the school so would invite her too) that I get on well with and would love to have them both there for the whole day. This guy is big - around the 40 stone mark - and I don't really know how else to put it - having looked at the church closely, he is not going to fit into the pews :-( I've tried to work out where else they could maybe sit but as the organ is at the back and there is a side entrance in the church, there isn't really anywhere other than those pews.
I want to invite them but I would feel awful if he was really uncomfortable for the service, especially as we have very limited numbers that the church will hold anyway, and a lot of family and very close friends coming, so it is going to be cosy regardless. At the same time, I don't want him to be singled out in any way so that he feels uncomfortable or awkward, or for it to be awkward if I just invite them to the rest of the day (reception and evening do), especially as it is such a long way for them to travel and the rest of the department are coming to the whole thing.
At the moment I'm thinking give them a save-the-date anyway and then that gives me more time to have a think about what to do. Just wondered if anyone else had any ideas? xxxx
CommentAuthorclair
Tbh, I think send him a save the date them he can decide for him self. He will know how big he is and will also know weather or not he will be comfortable or not. If he decided to come then it is up to him about being comfortable and not really your problem. Xxx
Started going out with my Gorgeous man 7/11/2010
Got engaged on the 21/9/2013
became mrs Thornton on the 2/8/2015
our wedding day was the best day ever :)!
CommentAuthorFlossie
I agree with Clair - send him a save the date and he can decide for himself :) it's not your problem to think about. You want him there so invite him xx
Happily married
18th June 2016
xx
CommentAuthorCamilaL
Like the ladies said... I think it's up to him. I think you have loads to worry about already, don't you? Just leave this to him :)
CommentAuthorlala "mod" bunni
edited
at that size he will be used to this sort of situation .. im sure he will deal with it him self .. i know its not the same but i was at a wedding 18mths ago on two crutches and i made the decision to sit at the back where it was easier for me ( got another wedding tomorrow where i will prob do same thing ) it not for the bride to worry about such things otherwise you would be tring to sit everyone according to their health conditions
I agree with lala, he shall be used to coming across situations like this. Is there room for some chairs anywhere in the church??
Our wedding day - 6 October 2012
CommentAuthorLouiseyweesey
Thank you ladies :-) Glitterfairy I'm going to ask the vicar as I know when I was at primary school and we used to have services in the church, the kids would sit in the pews and adults on chairs - I know they have changed bits and bobs in there but I'd hope it'd be possible still! His save the date is ready xxxx
CommentAuthorInDreamland
I also agree with Lala. Just send the STD x
Married the love of my life on Saturday 11th May 2013 xxx
Had our dream perfect honeymoon in Hawaii!
CommentAuthorAprilS61
Hopefully you've got it sorted! Fingers crossed he can make it xx
Mr & Mrs Swan 04/04/15
CommentAuthorTotallyLovedUp
I would send him one anyway and maybe ask the vicar if they can provide him with a chair maybe? It would be a shame not to have him there just because of his size. where there is a will, there is a way :)
CommentAuthorMrs T Hurley!
You could ask the vicar to put a few chairs at the back. You may find that others may want to do this for other reasons (eg those with babies). Like the others have said, send the invite. He'll be used to situations such as this x
Met 18/09/03
Engaged 06/09/08
Getting married 05/09/17
CommentAuthorGlitterfairy
If he's anything like a friend of mine, he'll make jokes out of it and won't be bothered.
Our wedding day - 6 October 2012
CommentAuthorLouiseyweesey
Thank you for the advice lovelies :) I gave him the save-the-date today and he was chuffed to bits. The vicar/ church must have had similar situations before so I'm sure between now and then I can sort out something for him. xxxx
CommentAuthorTeresa
i agree that you gave him it, he will be used to situations like this, he will sort himself out, i like the idea of the chairs at the back that will help others too! if they need it, eg mums/dads with babies.
CommentAuthorLouiseyweesey
I was having a good chat with him earlier and I think we might have a plan without me even having mentioned anything!!! :-D :-D :-D Firstly, he said he wants to lose at least 10 stone by next year and get fit as a personal challenge. Also he is a brilliant classical tenor singer and has very kindly offered to sing at the wedding, I thought whilst we are signing the registers would be lovely, so I'll get a space for him nearer a more spacious/ accessible area at the front anyway. Sorted! :-) xxxx
CommentAuthorFlossie
That would be brilliant, what a lovely thing for him to do! x
Happily married
18th June 2016
xx
CommentAuthorAprilS61
That would be lovely! x
Mr & Mrs Swan 04/04/15
CommentAuthorInDreamland
Aww how lovely, so sweet of him.
Married the love of my life on Saturday 11th May 2013 xxx
Had our dream perfect honeymoon in Hawaii!