FREE Wedding Table Planner

+ FREE Wedding Budget Planner and more wedding planning tools

Join now free to use

Wedding Forum - Maid of honor problems!...

Not signed in (Sign In)

UKbride Supermarket


* Discount available to Power Users only. Terms and conditions apply. more

  1.  
    • LornaB75
      CommentAuthorLornaB75
      Got married 5 years ago
      Posted: Aug 4th 2015
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    my maid of honor is my sister. she hasn't taken any interest in the wedding planning or her dress and just doesn't seem interested when i talk to her about. i thought this is what a maid of honor was for? to help with the wedding and to be there to talk about it to? in which case it might aswell be my mum!

    i'm booking a hair & makeup artist for us all. i have 2 bridesmaids. im going to pay obviously for myself, my mum because shes putting a lot of money into the wedding to help us out and im also paying for 1 bridesmaid because she doesnt wok or recieve benefits she has no income. so ive asked my sister to pay for her own hair & makeup. she said to me no i cant ive got no money, so i told her well it's 9 months away she has plenty of time to save up. she will only have to save up £1 a week! shes only 17, works and lives at home with my mum, she earns over £100 a week and has no bills or food to pay for my mum asks for nothing from her. is it really too much to ask for her to just put £50 in for her hair & makeup? or am i over reacting because this has annoyed quite a lot. i cant pay £200 plus another £200 for everyones trial. im even going to pay for her trial i didnt ask her to pay for that! :(
  2.  
    • LadyC
      CommentAuthorLadyC
      Got married 5 years ago
      Posted: Aug 4th 2015
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    Sorry to hear your MOH isn't showing much interest... though at 17 she probably doesn't get how important weddings are to the bride.

    I personally think you should either pay for them all, or don't pay for any. Picking and choosing who you pay for seems a bit unfair to me and I wouldn't be too happy either.

    Hope you get it sorted.

    Members signature icon
    xx Lady Charlotte Chamberlain to be! xx
    xx Marrying my soul mate on 22nd July 2016 xx

  3.  
    • Mrs M Wade
      CommentAuthorMrs M Wade
      Got married 4 years ago
      Posted: Aug 4th 2015
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    I agree with ladyC. Either pay for all of them or none at all x

    Members signature icon
    Became Mrs Wade 06/08/2016


  4.  
    • CommentAuthorMrsRobson2Be
      Posted: Aug 4th 2015
      BadgeBadge
     
    I agree with the others, also they do not need trials, skip them to save money x
  5.  
    • LornaB75
      CommentAuthorLornaB75
      Got married 5 years ago
      Posted: Aug 4th 2015
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    do you think its unfair to pay for my mum but not the bridesmaids's? shes putting £1,000 into the wedding aswell as making a lot of things so i dont feel like i want to make her pay for her hair & makeup aswell. i think you're right though about the bridesmaids. trouble is, if they both refuse and say they have no money what im supposed to do then, they wont have their hair done properly :( not bothered about makeup as i am a qualified beauty therapist i can just find time to do it myself x
  6.  
    • LornaB75
      CommentAuthorLornaB75
      Got married 5 years ago
      Posted: Aug 4th 2015
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    i think its a good idea to skip the trials actually. im not really fussy so as long as we have something i will be happy, will skip the trials! x
  7.  
    • LornaB75
      CommentAuthorLornaB75
      Got married 5 years ago
      Posted: Aug 4th 2015
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    i also understand she probably doesnt get how important it is and stuff. but all i want is for her to reply to my texts and let me actually talk to her about it. i had to sort her dress by myself she didnt even want to try it on or anything x
  8.  
    • Elinor Claire
      CommentAuthorElinor Claire
      Got married 6 years ago
      Posted: Aug 4th 2015
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    My bridesmaids all did their own hair. With five of them I couldn't really stretch to paying for them, so said that they could pay to have my hairdresser do it, do their own, or get another bridesmaid to do it. They had such different hair lengths and styles that they weren't going to have it the same way anyway. I was confident enough that those who were not so well off would be happy to do their own that I didn't feel bad about not offering to pay. I can see what people are saying about treating everyone the same, but you've clearly got good reasons for asking your sister to cover her own. She is very young, so maybe she hasn't got to grips with saving up for something specific. That could also explain why she hasn't been so involved, Maid of Honour is a lot of responsibility for one so young. I'd have expected her to be more keen about trying her dress, but then I had a 19 year old (not maid of honour) who was really difficult because she never liked committing to anything, so wouldn't agree to appointments for dress fittings. Have you discussed your concerns with your mum, maybe she can help?

    Members signature icon
    30th August 2014 was the best birthday ever.
    It was the day that I became Mrs. Dixon.

  9.  
    • LornaB75
      CommentAuthorLornaB75
      Got married 5 years ago
      Posted: Aug 4th 2015
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    my mum just said well thats libby for you. lol. i tried telling my mum i will pay for her hair but she wont let me so i guess i can use the money i was going to on my mum on the bridesmaids :) i was shocked when she wouldnt try the dress, she just sat there on her phone! she was so excited at first. maybe i should of chose somebody a bit older as maid of honor or just not had one but me and my sister are really close. ah well sorted now anyway as we are not having trial and my mum wants to pay for herself so will cost me £150 instead of £400 so if she doesnt pay herself i can :) x
  10.  
    • LornaB75
      CommentAuthorLornaB75
      Got married 5 years ago
      Posted: Aug 4th 2015
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    also she is pretty good with saving money when it comes to going to festivals or going out to get drunk so no problem there. she could of just given me £1 a week if she cant save anyway or even just 50p a week would cover her hair :)
  11.  
    • Emily17
      CommentAuthorEmily17
      Got married 3 years ago
      Posted: Aug 5th 2015
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    Glad you've sorted it. I
    think you need to treat all bridal party the same. Either pay for all or none. Itv not fair on them to be treated so differently. So maybe take this into consideration when looking at jewlery etc

    Members signature icon
    Met in 2009
    He proposed Jan 2014
    Will become Mrs P 7th October 2017
  12.  
    • ErinP42
      CommentAuthorErinP42
      Got married 3 years ago
      Posted: Aug 5th 2015
      BadgeBadge
     
    Agree with most comments here pay for all or none not fair to do some and not others
  13.  
    • LornaB75
      CommentAuthorLornaB75
      Got married 5 years ago
      Posted: Aug 5th 2015
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    We've already decided they will buy their own shoes. And if they want to wear jewellery will have to buy it theirselves. Things like nails and tans won't be a problem as I'm trained in them so will do it for them :) x
 
Enter Now