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  1.  
    • LeahG
      CommentAuthorLeahG
      Posted: Jun 11th 2014
     
    Ok so i have 4 big brides maids and 6 little ones. Since we are on a tight budget and we have so many bridesmaids what are your thoughts on asking them/parents to buy their dresses?

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  2.  
    • Elinor Claire
      CommentAuthorElinor Claire
      Got married 6 years ago
      Posted: Jun 11th 2014
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    I would say it depends on how well off they are, and whether you are happy to give them a say in what dresses they have.

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  3.  
    • lala "mod" bunni
      CommentAuthorlala "mod" bunni
      Got married 9 years ago
      Posted: Jun 11th 2014
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    NO i dont think its cheeky ..esp in this day and age of money being tight ....

    you would have to take thier opinions into consideration though .. i mean you cant say " well i want you to have this dress in this colour but its going to cost you £200 "

    my friend said to hers i would like you to have dresses in this colour , but the style is up to you ,, the bm`sent away and came back to her with pictures of what they had found , because they had the same colour they all looked connected while having dresses that they would wear again and that suited all the different body shapes ... looked fab

  4.  
    • clairenina
      CommentAuthorclairenina
      Got married 6 years ago
      Posted: Jun 11th 2014
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    It's not cheeky, but I think I'd mention at the point of asking them if they want to be a bridesmaid
  5.  
    • Whovianbride
      CommentAuthorWhovianbride
      Got married 5 years ago
      Posted: Jun 11th 2014
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    I asked mine, but like above i mentioned that before they accepted.

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  6.  
    • RachelW22
      CommentAuthorRachelW22
      Posted: Jun 11th 2014
     
    I have 3 older bridesmaids, 2 junior bridesmaids and 3 flowergirls and they/their parents are paying for their own dresses and shoes and i am paying for their hair, makeup, nails, flowers, jewellery & hair accessories and they didnt mind :/
  7.  
    • *KelBel*
      CommentAuthor*KelBel*
      Got married 6 years ago
      Posted: Jun 11th 2014
      Is poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadge
     
    I think it's ok as long as they have a say and the budget is something they can choose and afford x

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  8.  
    • B2B2017
      CommentAuthorB2B2017
      Got married 3 years ago
      Posted: Jun 11th 2014
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    We originally planned for wedding in Cyprus so I was going to buy my bridesmaid dresses as they would be paying to come to the wedding and didn't want them to be forking out ontop for dresses too! BUT I only have 2 adults (my sisters) and 2 children / FG (my nieces)

    Since deciding to get married here in UK I will be asking them to buy their dresses, I most likely won't be going down the bridal shop route though and expecting them to get £200+ dresses either x

    Planning to perfection <3


  9.  
    • AprilS61
      CommentAuthorAprilS61
      Got married 6 years ago
      Posted: Jun 12th 2014
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    I would ask if they were reasonably priced, but as ours are £180 each I wouldn't ask them to pay. So I've got the dress and gifts, flowers, hair and makeup, and just asked them to buy shoes and a hair trial each. They were happy enough with that :)

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  10.  
    • Becca
      CommentAuthorBecca
      Got married 5 years ago
      Posted: Jun 12th 2014
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    I am going to ask my BM's to pay for their dresses but will make sure I don't pick anything above the £100 mark.

    Met 28th January 2007
    Engaged 2nd July 2012
    To be married 11th September 2015
  11.  
    • CommentAuthorFranM76
      Posted: Jun 12th 2014
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    I don't think it's cheeky as long as they can have a say on budget and style xx
  12.  
    • barbie86
      CommentAuthorbarbie86
      Got married 6 years ago
      Posted: Jun 12th 2014
      Is poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadge
     
    Personally, I think the only way this is OK is if you give them total say ie let them wear something they already own. I don't think it's OK to ask them to be bridesmaids and then tell them they need to buy x dress in x colour. So if you can be totally flexible I think it's OK, otherwise not.

    You could always compromise by providing the dresses but asking them to wear their own shoes and accessories (we're doing this as a) we don't care about matching shoes and accessories and b) the dresses have cost a small fortune: anything from £150-360). You can get dresses for the younger girls very cheaply (remember to think outside the box; it doesn't have to be a bridesmaid/flower girl dress specifically); likewise you could look at high-street stores for the older ones. Or, perhaps you could give them something each towards an outfit (eg £30) and again be flexible about colour and style?
  13.  
    • Velcro
      CommentAuthorVelcro
      Got married 6 years ago
      Posted: Jun 13th 2014
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    As long as you don't expect to have full say in what they wear and maybe in different dresses and you don't try getting them to buy a dress for hundreds of pounds, then I don't see a problem with it. dunno about the flower girl dresses though, 6 kids and 6 mothers all with their own opinions...

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  14.  
    • CommentAuthorWelshbride
      Posted: Jun 13th 2014
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    I wouldn't expect someone to buy their own dress. I agree with barbie86 and would say if I couldn't afford to buy them a dress I would allow them to wear something they already own and maybe suggest preferred colour.
  15.  
    • Hollie'Jo
      CommentAuthorHollie'Jo
      Got married 5 years ago
      Posted: Jun 15th 2014
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    I have 5 bridesmaids and 2 flower girls, I am buying all of their dresses and asking them to each buy their shoes/bags hair/makeup etc. that way I can make sure all bridesmaids are in the same dress!
  16.  
    • Melody743281C
      CommentAuthorMelody743281C
      Posted: Jul 3rd 2014
     
    I don't think it's a good choice....
  17.  
    • KayleighS46
      CommentAuthorKayleighS46
      Got married 5 years ago
      Posted: Jul 3rd 2014
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    I've got 4 adult bridemaids and 2 flower girls and I'm buying everything for them. To be honest its my choice - I only plan on getting married once so I want to make sure everything is as I want it - i know it sounds really selfish - but this is what I want. On the opposite side I'm bridesmaid for my friend next year and shes paying for my dress, hair and make up while i'll buy the shoes and jewellery myself. I think personally people expect it these days and you shouldnt feel bad.

    End of the day if your on a tight budget and the £500+ you would spend on briodesmaids can and need to go on other important things then do it. Its your day :)

    Good Luck!!! xx

    Met 2013
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  18.  
    • VictoriaL46
      CommentAuthorVictoriaL46
      Got married 5 years ago
      Posted: Jul 3rd 2014
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    It's not cheeky but it is something you should have mentioned to them before asking them especially with so many bridesmaids. You will also not be able to have much of a say as it's coming out of their pocket.

    For this reason and a few others I went down from what I originally wanted , 5 BMs and 2FGs, down to 3 BMs and 1FG and I am buying all their dresses however they are buying their shoes with a guideline to stick to particular colour and that is all.

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  19.  
    • InDreamland
      CommentAuthorInDreamland
      Got married 8 years ago
      Posted: Jul 3rd 2014
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    It's not cheeky but like others have said you should have let them know they'd have to pay for their own dress if they accept.

    I decided I wanted to pay for all bridesmaids dresses, hair and makeup so I limited myself to 2 grown up bridesmaids and one flower girl. That way I could afford it.

    Personally if I had to pay for my own bridesmaid dress etc. I'd be telling the bride that I have a limit on how much I will spend on it, I'd want to choose it myself and I would also probably spend very little on a wedding gift as I wouldn't be able to afford a lot.

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  20.  
    • WelshBrideBethan2015
      CommentAuthorWelshBrideBethan2015
      Got married 6 years ago
      Posted: Jul 3rd 2014
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    Think it should of been asked before anything bought or agreed on at the start as some people may think it's cheeky at the end but if you explain I'm sure something can be agreed .

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  21.  
    • TanyaS78
      CommentAuthorTanyaS78
      Got married 5 years ago
      Posted: Jul 3rd 2014
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    I dont think its cheeky. If they were choosing the style etc, they could pick something that they could wear again (if that would be ok with you). Im going to ask my bridesmaids if they can buy theirs, but ive said they can have quite casual dresses, so they can use them again whenever they want.
  22.  
    • Nelinde
      CommentAuthorNelinde
      Got married 6 years ago
      Posted: Jul 6th 2014
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      edited
     
    When we started wedding planning we had budgeted to buy the bms dresses at around £250 each. But a little later on the down the line my OH got laid off and it crippled us financially :(
    I'm a SAHM so we had no choice but to claim benefits while my OH looks for another job :(
    Due to these unforseen circumstances I had to ask the bms to pay for their own dresses. But we all sat down and agreed a new budget of £50 per dress which they were all happy with. I've managed to find bms dresses on bay of e in this budget and as an extra thing I've also bought their sandles myself so they all match and they didn't have to pay extra.
    We also have an understanding that if our financial circumstances get better then we will reimburse them the costs of the dresses :)

    I think aslong as you are upfront with them and you all agree on a reasonable budget for everyone then there shouldn't be any problems. I still managed to pick the dresses but this did take a bit of extra work as it took me a long time to get them all to agree on a dress they were all happy with, they wouldn't have had that much free reign if I were still paying for them lol ;)

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  23.  
    • RebeccaH100
      CommentAuthorRebeccaH100
      Got married 6 years ago
      Posted: Jul 6th 2014
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    Ry and I were 100% asking our bridesmaids to buy their own dresses before we won the contest. I honestly think that is totally fine. I have been asked to buy mine before and didn't think anything of it. I would make sure you keep the budget reasonable and also let your bridesmaids know that if they can't afford it, its TOTALLY okay. Even with free dresses, my maids will be paying for alterations and I gave them the heads up and the option to just be very special guests if that was easier for them. Weddings are expensive and you can only do what you can do!

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