Ok so here is my problem, please give honest views, I have a friend I was very close to since my first child started nursery, so around about 8 years ago, we did everything together,in the last couple of years we drifted apart a bit,still seen each other but it was different,I had to make all the effort,she didn't treat me very well,she got close to someone else and basically I was in the background,before all this I was like I'm getting married and had automatically said she was coming to my wedding ( all day ) now my h2b has rightly said she hasn't treated me well and he doesn't want her at the day just the evening, I was like eek! This is awkward for me, I still see her, on and off, we haven't mentioned the wedding apart from me saying it's stressing me out! I'm one of those people that find it hard yo be ruthless as everyone I've asked so far has said,don't say anything to her and just give her the evening invite, I feel I have to explain why ( obviously I'm not gonna say as your a rubbish friend lately,it would be about numbers and saving money which is true as well) what would you do please help! Sorry for long post but felt I needed to explain properly x
CommentAuthorFlossie
I would personally invite her to the evening only. For us, the day is for sharing with people who are really close to you and who you couldn't imagine not being there.. Because you have drifted apart so much it doesn't sound like you have that closeness now x
Happily married
18th June 2016
xx
CommentAuthorGlitterfairy
When reading this, I felt I was reading my own story, only difference was that it was my moh, and that feeling got more so after the wedding. I can see why your partner does not want her at the whole day, but I also know how awkward you feel.
Our wedding day - 6 October 2012
CommentAuthorTeresa
I'm definitely just inviting her to the evening, she has a partner and 4 children,2 of those would be adult prices anyway, so it does come down to cost too!
I just don't feel I cannot leave it without saying anything but most people say just to post invite and not say a thing. It's the only thing I'm stressing about!
CommentAuthorFlossie
I don't think you need to say anything. Only say something if she questions it x
Yeah I don't think you need to say anything, or if you really feel uncomfortable just posting it, then next time you see her let her know that invites are going out but that you can only invite her to the evening due to cost.
CommentAuthorInDreamland
Just give her the evening invite and if she asks explain its a numbers space and cost thing.
Married the love of my life on Saturday 11th May 2013 xxx
Had our dream perfect honeymoon in Hawaii!
CommentAuthorMrs T Hurley!
Send the evening invite and only say why if she asks. She might notice that your friendship isn't what it used to be either x
Met 18/09/03
Engaged 06/09/08
Getting married 05/09/17
CommentAuthorKatieH
I wouldn't say anything and just send the eve invite. I've drifted apart from some of my friends so will only be inviting them to the eve x
Met in 2007
Started dating in 2009
Got engaged in 2014
Became Mrs Holme 11.06.16
CommentAuthorthefuture:Mrs_Hurren
I agree with the others just give her an evening invite x
CommentAuthorAprilS61
Just invite her to the evening and dont say anything unless she asks. Just becuse they've known you for a long time it doesn't mean they get a free pass to all day guest. They have to bother with you enough for you to pay the cost of a day guest.
If it comes up just say you aren't as close and she doesn't see you as much so your day guests are really tight knit family and a few friends only.
Mr & Mrs Swan 04/04/15
CommentAuthorTeresa
Thanks all, this has helped me a lot :) xx
CommentAuthorDonnaH39
Keep us updated on how it goes.
CommentAuthorTeresa
Ok will do ladies , thanks, appreciate your help xx
CommentAuthorTeresa
ok so an update..... ive given her partner the invite, i did ask him to explain but being a typical man, he didn't say anything to her, just gave her it, so ive sent her a text (i know i know, i cant help it) jut saying, H2B wanted some friends and need to save pennies so, had to keep numbers down, hope she understands....
she came back with she totaly understands and she will be there for the evening,
Phew, im glad that's done, it was stressing me out so much.
