Me and my h2b are stressing out about our upcoming wedding due to our families. My parents and mil do not get on at all, and are refusing to be in the same room as each other. It's really getting me down that everyone is being like this, I feel like we should postpone the wedding until we try and solve the family issues. Proper stressed :(
Met in 2008
Together since 4th June 2009
Engaged since 22nd August 2012
Soon to be Mrs C in 2016
CommentAuthorKatya
babe... it is your day!
Simply invite them all round yours or mutual ground such as a restaurant (dont tell them all that they will all be there) then when they all arrive, tell them if they cannot resolve their issues or agree to place their issues on the back burner for your day then NONE of them are invited. At the end of the day if they love you more than they hate eachother, they will cooporate!
Find out who you are & do it on purpose!
CommentAuthorEmily17
Like katys idea x
Met in 2009
He proposed Jan 2014
Will become Mrs P 7th October 2017
CommentAuthorGlitterfairy
It so annoys me when people are like this and refuse to be in teh same room for one day. They need to grow up and get out the playground and be civil to each other, both for you and your hubby, even if only one day.
We had BIL's older daughters at the wedding and they refuse to speak to their Dad, at a funeral the previous year they had wanted to put a pint over his head, however, on the day, they were civil, they did not get close to him or talk to him, or cause any issues. If they can do such a grown up thing in their 20s then so should an older adult. That's what I think.
Our wedding day - 6 October 2012
CommentAuthorFlossie
Definitely do not postpone your wedding because of other people! This is your day and they should be mature enough to just be civil for the sake of one day. If they cannot behave like adults and get on with each other for the sake of you and your wedding then they're not invited, simple! Sorry you are having a hard time of it, I hope things get better for you x
You've got a fair while yet in order to resolve things. You could change the traditional order of the top table round so that MIL doesn't sit with your father. Is there anyone other than you and your H2B that knows both families and that could act as mediator to take the load off you? Or can you get an agreement that for the wedding day they will be civil to each other for your sakes?
30th August 2014 was the best birthday ever.
It was the day that I became Mrs. Dixon.
CommentAuthorMrs D2B
I would just tell them that for the sake of one day, YOUR day, they can be civil and if they can't be civil either they don't come or they will be removed. My sister is concerned with how her mum will behave on her wedding day (she has done some pretty horrific things to our dad since they split up 10 years ago) and because of this she has decided against a sit down meal and opted for buffet style instead allowing people to sit where they want and hopefully preventing any situation by not forcing our dad and her mum to be in each others company (she has also told her mum that if she causes any problems she will be escorted out of the wedding). I've gone a different direction, I am currently not on good terms with my MIL(long story but we are hoping this will change in the next few years as we used to be very close) and my history with my mum isn't good, so in order to make sure I enjoy my day I will go against the traditional top table, instead I will have my bridesmaids and h2b groomsmen on the top table and then have the family on 2 tables separate from the top table but next to it (if that make sense) so that I can relax but, fingers crossed, the family members won't feel too put out. At the end of the day you'll have to do what works for you but you will need to take control, sitting back and worrying about what will be is another stress you don't need in the run up to your big day. Good luck xx
31/12/2017 A New Year, A New Life, A New Husband and Wife
CommentAuthorKirstyR386
Definitely don't postpone your day. I think I would just send the invites and if anyone asks if the others are invited, simply smile and say yes. If they can't be civil for one day then they don't have to come. This leave it up to them to make the decision and doesn't make you or h2b look bad by picking sides. X
I don't know why families can't just get on for one day. There seems to be a lot of us that are going through similar things
Became Mrs Wade 06/08/2016
CommentAuthorKatya
YAY!!!! Lala is back to her slapping ways!
Find out who you are & do it on purpose!
CommentAuthorEmmaG
I agree with Katya, and it would need to be done sooner rather than later as you don't want it like this for the whole of your planning.. and tell them if they cant say anything nice then not to say anything at all with regards to each other or the wedding. sorry to hear its like that for you , cant believe they would put there petty differences above your happy day. crazy.. they need a reality check , good luck :)
Soooooo excited to be marrying my Best Friend !!
Life is Wild, Love it Live it !
CommentAuthorEmmilou82
Lala... Lol!!! I belly laughed at that
Marrying 'The One' on 30th July 2016
I am now Mrs Emma Stokoe xx
CommentAuthorInDreamland
How childish and selfish, for both sides of parents to behave like that.
I'd lock them all in a room together until they can agree to at least be civil to each other for one day for the sake of their children's happiness.
Failing that none of them are invited to the wedding. Shame on them!
Married the love of my life on Saturday 11th May 2013 xxx
Had our dream perfect honeymoon in Hawaii!
CommentAuthorMrs M Wade
Became Mrs Wade 06/08/2016
CommentAuthorTeresa
so sad how some people can act, my uncle is being like this after i invited my auntie, they are divorced but ive still remained close to her as-well as him, he isnt too happy, ive just said im inviting them and you and if you choose not to come thats up to you, i did say that if he cant do this for me for one day (put his differences to the side for one day)then its a shame he cant do that for his niece, so the ball is in his court now, im not letting anyone tell me who should and shouldn't come to my day.
CommentAuthorAmandaK74
sorry that your family are making you feel this way, however I have to agree with everyone else DO NOT put yourself out and prospone you are making your own family now your getting married and I would advise you put yourself 1st. This is their issue anyway not yours and you shouldn't have to be the ones sorting it out. im sure for 1 day they can put their grievences aside then go their separate ways.
good luck hun
met 11th December 2010
engaged 2nd August 2013
getting married to the love of my life 11th july 2015
CommentAuthorVictoriaL46
I agree with everyone. Don't let your families have any power over your day. They need to suck it up for you both and plaster a smile on for the photos.
Met in Nov 2005
Engaged 13th June 2013
Becomes Mrs Stewart on 10th Aug 2015 Honeymoon in Florida!
My Diary Thread: My Alice in Wonderland Wedding Diary
CommentAuthorCaseyW50
Thank you everyone, I will try and resolve this hopefully in the near future xx
Met in 2008
Together since 4th June 2009
Engaged since 22nd August 2012
Soon to be Mrs C in 2016
CommentAuthorAprilS61
You're not alone with situations like this! I've had this also. Because of it, unfortunately I no longer have a relationship with my mam and stepdad or sister and her fiance. I hope you manage to solve yours with a better (and more grown up) result! x
Katya x
