Wedding Forum - Bridesmaids...

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General wedding discussion!: bridesmaids

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- CommentAuthoremmaleighta
ive got a massive family and i kind of just wanted 3 or 4 bridesmaids all of which are my cousins but both my sister in laws have just sort of assumed that they are bridesmaids also.......what should i do????
- CommentAuthorMrs (Dove) Pidgeon
Tell them straight asap. (Nicely of course!)

Now a extremely happy German housewife and now a Mother!!!!
Islay Jean born 24th June in Hannover.
- CommentAuthorcharlotteverity
you will just have to tell polietly that you have choosen your bridesmaids and that unfortunatly they arent going to be one. x
- CommentAuthorCarolanneJune
yea just tell them there is nothing else you can do x
- CommentAuthorbobbysgirl
is it money or princepal why you hadn't origionally thought of them? if it's money ask if they could contribute to their dresses? if you just don't want them talk with your fiance as it would be a good idea to have him on your side, then you can sit down together and tell them

- CommentAuthorCeCe
Grown ups need to STOP ASSUMING!!!!!

You need to calmly with a smile and a tone of voice that means business say 'WE have chosen BM's and we are sticking with the cousins' ..simple.
- CommentAuthorstranger23
if you dont want them as your bridesmaid maybe give them another job to do to make them feel involved?
- CommentAuthoremmaleighta
its not money.....i was stupid really ive always imagined havvin my little cousins as bridesmaids an just never thought of havin my sister in laws as bridesmaids also. It did kind of tick me off that they just assumed id hav them. I sound really mean but this is a time where i want everythin my way an i guess it wudnt be so horrible to have them included in my wedding. It will cost alot more obviously. But on the day im not gonna care... Xx
- CommentAuthoremmaleighta
Aaahhh that's a good idea.....givving them another job to do....just gotta think of a job lol. Maybe one cud do flowers and another could do favours??
- CommentAuthorcharlotteverity
its your wedding day so you have a right to have everything your way and if ppl dont like it tough, your paying for it not them. x
- CommentAuthorCeCe
...just wanting small kids as Bridesmaids is a PERFECT 'excuse' to use!
- CommentAuthorpinkieprincess21
i think you should tell them straight hun but maybe find different jobs for them to do! that way they will still feel involved in some way,. but dont do anything just to keep them happy, its YOUR day remember!!!! xxx
- CommentAuthor~* Jen *~
I'd love to just have small kids... it's a brilliant thing to say to make sure you get who you want. And make sure you do, because wedding planning is stressful enough!! xx
- CommentAuthor[email protected]
I'm not sure what to do about my bridesmaids and wondered what you all think.

I will be asking my best friend who I have known since we were babies so that's sorted but my OH also has 3 sisters and a niece who will be 8 years old by the time of the wedding. I also have a sister, but things have been strained between us for a while as she has been stirring trouble towards my OH. Obviously I won't be asking my sister!

The problem is that I would like to ask my OH's youngest sister as we get along well and have spent time together, whereas I don't really know the other 2 very well (one of them makes no effort at all and I only get hello/goodbye from her) I would also like to ask his little niece too as she's such a little poppet and I know that she would love being a princess for a day. I'm worried about upsetting the other sisters by only asking one of them, it also comes down to money and the expense of dresses, flowers etc as I could never ask them to pay for themselves. The only other option would be to chicken out and only have my best friend. I just don't want to upset anyone but also don't want lots of bridesmaids that I don't know and can't afford.

Met: 2nd September 2012
Engaged: 3rd January 2015
Wedding day: 2nd September 2017
- CommentAuthorGlitterfairy
If you don't want to upset the other sisters, how about having your friend and his niece, then have the sister you get on with do a reading so it makes her feel included.

Our wedding day - 6 October 2012
- CommentAuthorVelcro
i just put myself in that position. if i wasn't close to you; i wouldn't expect to be asked to be a bridesmaid. any one who makes assumptions otherwise i find to be a bit full of themselves 'just because' they are his sisters doesn't give them an automatic right. and decent people will understand that. just ask the other sister and the neice

Wibbly wobbly, timey wimey
*Kelbel* is my wedding twinny!
- CommentAuthorMrs Jones
Have had a similar predicament. At the end of the day, it's not about anybody else, but about you and your OH and what you want. Have who you want and not who you feel obliged to have. If people want to get stroppy and funny about it, it's their problem, not yours and also selfish as it's not about them but about you.

First Date 26 April 2014
Proposed 27 June 2015
Happily Married 18 June 2016
- CommentAuthorEmily17
I like Gfs idea to be honest x

Met in 2009
He proposed Jan 2014
Will become Mrs P 7th October 2017
- CommentAuthorKirstyR386
I was thinking the same as GF. No one can argue about you having the niece and if you have 2 readings, one could be from each side of the family so the sister you get on with is involved. X
- CommentAuthorStephH96
Is the neice the daughter of the sister you want to ask, or one of the others'? (Hope that makes sense!)
If its mother and daughter, simple easy explanation.
If not then you shoudnt worry anyway as a) your wedding you choose and B)if they don't speak with you they shouldn't feel entitled.
- CommentAuthor[email protected]
The niece is the daughter of the sister who makes little or no effort. I don't think she would be bothered by not being asked and if her daughter is bridesmaid she should be ok with it, that just leaves the older sister. I am thinking of just having my BF and niece as its a safer option.

Met: 2nd September 2012
Engaged: 3rd January 2015
Wedding day: 2nd September 2017

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