How has everyone cut down their daytime lists? We have 135 plus children at the moment, and want to get it to around 100 plus kids. Some of the family, we feel like we have to invite to be polite, even though they don't make the effort to attend anything else, as we would have their siblings attending. Do we just say no evening only to all cousins etc, or pick and choose and maybe upset a few? X
It's your day....we invited only the people we wanted and we picked friends over some distant cousins as we spend more time with them. It got to the point I actually didn't care if I offended anyone and everyone got over it x
It's tough but you need to have the people there that mean something to you and are close. We are having people that are important to us and have told others they can come to the evening due to numbers and so far everyone has understood xx
I've invited extra as some people won't be able to make it but may not know til very last minute xz
your day invite who you want. my partner as a big family so we only invite in nephews and nieces (one niece was our flower girl) and only two of his mums sisters (one had to travel) and on his dad side he only invited one of his cousins as dont really see his aunties and uncles. However we did invite the aunties and uncles and cousins to the evening although only a few showed up. my side i dont have such a big family so invited both my uncles (my dads two brothers) my two cousins on my dads side. I then invited both my aunties and my uncle (my mums two sisters and brother) plus my cousins as two of my cousins were bridesmaids plus really close to my cousins only one didnt come but as i only had one grand parent there my nan (my mums mum) we managed to get a nice picture of us grandchildren for her and near enough full family picture for her :) tbh more of my family were at our wedding due to the fact they had to travel from oxfordshire/buckinghamshire were my family are from up to north east lincolnshire x
Invite who you are close to for the day, everyone else in the evening if you feel you must invite them. If people get upset then that is their issue. Weddings are expensive everyone knows that and really should know if they are close to you or not. There are probably some on your current day invite list who don't expect one as you are not that close.
Invite who you want. Weddings will inevitably cause drama with someone who thinks they should be invited. Just ignore it and enjoy your big day with the people you love and are close too. Xx
I'm not inviting half my partners family - we don't speak to his auntie, so therefore she's not coming, and neither are his cousins by her, their partners or their kids. Saved us 11 spaces by not inviting those, and also considering not inviting one of his aunties on his dad's side and her kids, Partners, kids etc, saved another 8 spaces there. 19 people we were only inviting to be polite not being invited now. We've since found one of his cousins is getting married and we weren't invited, and another had a Christening last year, and another this year - both where we were not invited to. Kinda made our answer up for us to be honest... You've just got to be brutal and think how many times you would willingly visit them, and when the last time you saw them actually was. It will annoy his family but to be fair, sod it.
We invited about 140 to the whole day and now we only have 90 coming (including children) ... You'll find on average about 20% of the people you invite to your wedding will decline xx
I read somewhere to look at it as invite people to the day that you would ordinarily offer to buy dinner for, because essentially that's what you're doing
I have 8 sets of aunty and uncles and 19 cousins so I had no cousins but 2 and one was a bridesmaid as I could only have 85 so had to and also had no kids but 3 who were family members. It's your day and you have who you want and who you're closest too as a lot of people we don't see. Once we knew we could.pnly have ⁴² each it felt easier and few declined anyway xx
We are having no kids at the ceremony or wedding breakfast, and have only invited family and friends that we see regularly and actually like! Anyone we're inviting to be polite will have an evening invite only xx
I would invite who you like, some of my aunties were invited some were not mainly down to fact we hardly saw them x
It's your day, I invited all my aunties and uncles to the meal and cousins to the church and evening, believe me there's a lot of them... Some people I invited to avoid a problem but at the end of the day you have there who you want, if they have an problem with that ignore it!
You have to be brutal and just cut people. Think about who you really want there. Also with family make a cut off point and stick to it
Because I am getting married on a Friday it's made my decision easier and we haven't invited children to the day apart x from my two boys x they are all coming to the night do instead
You have to be brutal. I've got a huge family but I'm not inviting them all. We have 150 guests (not including kids) and that's after cuts. It's yours and your H2B day so invite who you want. If people get huffy tell them they're more than welcome to come if they wish to pay for their places. That's what I'll be doing and I'm pretty sure after being told that they'll shut up.
Our day guests are limited to 55 so it has been a challenge as i have a large family an my h2b not so many family more friends he considers family. So iv had manly family an hes had a mix but will be inviting all to the evening ..
You've got to be brutal. We split our list in half. 100 guests kids. 49 each. I've only got 3 of my many many cousins coming to the reception. The rest will be invited to the evening do. It's an awkward one for me because we live in England but doing it in Dublin. So not many will want to travel just for the evening do. But that's how it is really! If they don't like it, do they really deserve to be there if they can't understand it
Found this if it helps?!
Kick all the cousins and children to the night time
I am inviting cousins to the evening only not to be mean but because we don't have the numbers to cater for them all day xx