UK
UKbride Member Request 18 Jan 2021

Family stresses

Anyone else have family situations which is a worry for your big day? My parents do not get on and I’m so worried about how it will be on the day ???? X

22 Comments
UKbride Member 19 Feb 2021

Mine don't but they should be adult enough just to get on with it and just keep their distance x

UKbride Member 19 Feb 2021

My parents don't get along but they were on their best behaviour for my big day, they were polite to each other for me

UKbride Member 19 Feb 2021

Mum and dad divorced and dont speak. They are both saying they are not coming if the other is even if they sit the other end of room to each other.

UKbride Member 19 Feb 2021

I am in the same boat. My birth father and my sister have never met and I’m really stuck about what to do as I don’t want the day to become about their first meeting or put that kind of pressure on my sister as she has no desire to meet him. He hasn’t been a father to me these last 35 years but as he gets older he is really trying to make an effort and it will really hurt him if i don’t invite him, but my sister and I are very close after a turbulent childhood and I don’t want to upset her or get married without her.

UKbride Member 19 Feb 2021

Yep! In the same boat on a few things.

UKbride Member 19 Feb 2021

My parents don't get on with my fiancé's for good reason. They'll ignore each other or be civil. MIL has been told she behaves or she's disowned.

UKbride Member 19 Feb 2021

My family are a nightmare and I've had a lot of tears and arguments. I've now made the point that they're all invited, if they decide not to come due to issues with other guests then so be it. It's them who's missing out, enjoy your day because the people who love you and want to be there will be.

UKbride Member 19 Feb 2021

Tell them to act like adults, suck it up, it's not about them it is about you and your husband. If they can't be civil and polite then then I'd be giving a piece of my mind. They don't have to be best buddies or particular talk to each other but put a smile on their faces and make the effort. They'd be told to f off and not bother coming big they couldn't do that for just one day. X

UKbride Member 19 Feb 2021

Parents divorced and don't get on, other family members that don't get on, but remember it's about you two as a couple and if anyone kicks off their just being selfish and it only reflects badly on them. Causally remind people how excited you are for a lovely day with all those you love and Joe you can't wait to have a drama free day!

UKbride Member 19 Feb 2021

The people that could have caused issue for me aren't being invited. It's your day and your money, don't invite the problem in! I'll probably have a bit of fallout after but I'm not bothered because my day is intact 🤷‍♀️

UKbride Member 19 Feb 2021

I told my parents if they can’t ignore each other for one day then neither of them are welcome.

UKbride Member 19 Feb 2021

Tell them it's tough shit and they have to deal with seeing each other for 1 day - doesn't mean they have to speak to each other. Remind them it's your day and you want them their for you

UKbride Member 19 Feb 2021

Me and my ex husband really didn't get along. But we both love our daughter and would never have spoilt her day.
You might be surprised x

UKbride Member 19 Feb 2021

My parents don’t speak but they do know how to behave in public. They also know if they try to spoil the day they will be asked to leave. Explain that the other parent has also been invited and give them the option to attend and be civil or stay away if they can’t

UKbride Member 19 Feb 2021

Yep in the same situation xx

UKbride Member 19 Feb 2021

I dont get on my with Mother in law so dreading our wedding. 😭 narcissist people are the worst.

UKbride Member 19 Feb 2021

We find they are ok on the day or you just dont see it as much just enjoy your day

UKbride Member 20 Feb 2021

I had this situation and honestly felt like there could have been 1000 problems. I invited all and decided to let them just show their true colours should they need. There was a slight disagreement but it was shut down very quickly by others who were there. It in no way ruined my wedding or made my dya any less special. Obviously your situation may be very different but you shouldn't have to pander to anyone else's silliness!

UKbride Member 20 Feb 2021

Dan Round 😂😂😂 well we will be ok wont be hardly any of my lot there

UKbride Member 20 Feb 2021

My parents where split up.married a gain.did sep tables for them away from each other,didn’t do normal top table.had best man and his wife and some friends .did all round tables.no hassle.my dad said a few sarcy things but he got told of but other than that went well.he likes to stir things up,likes to wind my mum up.loved my day.hope all goes well.tell them straight.it’s your day.xx

UKbride Member 20 Feb 2021

It's easier said than done but don't worry about anyone else. I had family members not turn up and others egnore each other cuz of the hate. Yes it broke my heart and it is hard but just remember to look at the people who are their smiling and and keep looking at yourself Inn the mirror thinking damn I'm looking fine today 😂 because that's all that matters

UKbride Member 22 Feb 2021

My 6 year old has special needs. He was 4 when I got married. His condition makes him very unpredictable. It was a constant worry about whether he would do what he should be doing or if he would just run off. He is also very clingy to me, but I was amazed on the day by his beautiful behaviour. He was an angel.

Comment

Before we add your comment, please: log in to an existing UKbride account or join UKbride
Why Join?